Is he cappin? ?

[Anonymous]

This guy I've been dating for a few months says he's got a medical issue where he's always horny. We don't get much time to be together so when we do I want us to talk and chill and just hang out, not spend it always on sex. So when I refuse him he acts cold towards me and says if I don't give him sex when he asks for it then he won't give me any more attention and I get the minimum effort. When I argue with him that he's giving sex too much importance he goes on to play on my feelings saying it's a medical condition and he really can't help himself and sex is that important to him because it affect his daily life. I don't know if he's really troubled by it or he's just bullshitting me.

[PrudentGuy]

Yes and no.

Yes:
The "medical" part is too extreme. He for sure won't die without sex.

No:
True with guys like us, without sex, we lost focus and our worklife could he affected.

And we may get depressed.

Suggestions:
1) understand that us guys intepret sex as an expression of love from you girls.

Yes, much like you like to have private talks, romantic times, and hear "I love you", we guys just need sex to feel loved.

And conversely, denial is like telling us, we're not good enough, need to change, etc.

2) communicate more and negotiate "win-win". Be creative.

Yes, tell him what you need to feel loved. (Yes, he just need sex.) Then come to an agreement and draft a plan to filfill the need of both.

To conclude, sex could be a little thing to you because your need is different from us guys. In fact, what you want is as unimportant to us as sex is to you. Hence empathize and your relationship will go a ling way.

[mayur1598]

Well, I don't get the medical condition or not...
But if he sex is not all in relationship...
So, he need to take medical care about this...
And if he refuse to do that... Then maybe he is fooling you and just in the chance of taking advantage of you...
And if so... I suggest leave him...

[Asker]

He refuses to visit a doctor, says there's nothing to do about it. And I'd feel bad for leaving him because of something he has no power over.

[mayur1598]

Well, then problem is not in him... Its in you... Don't take me wrong... But you need to rethink about what do you want and where its all going in between both of you... And what can you do about it...

[chriss]

I don't think he loves you, I think he sees your relationship sexually only which isn't healthy.

How do you feel? Would you be able to accept it like this?

[IveGotNoName]

Doesn't sound legit tbh

[Asker]

Yeah, been thinking the same

[RyanK9b]

There are illnesses like that but super rare. Sounds like normal hornyness to me.
If he has that illness, he would think about it non stop. Literally non stop and you had noticed

[Asker]

He is horny almost 24/7, he'd still be hard right after spending but he's only been making this sex or nothing thing recently so I don't know

[RyanK9b]

If he's really diagnosed with that he surely have paper/documents that says so. In his private documents or with his doctor.

[Boytoy98]

Sounds quite toxic to me

[Asker]

It kinda is