If the girl wants sex the one day into the relationship, is that a bad sign?

chriscdi Master

im not in this position, im just asking 🙃

0 0

Superb Opinion

DrunkAss Yoda
+1 y
For me, sorta, because I like to be the one that makes the move. It's all weird and confusing to me if she makes the first. I'm supposed to be the one that wants sex on the first day. She's supposed to be the reluctant one that is second-guessing herself while I persuade her with my touch. My whole universe goes out of flux if there's no persuasion required whatsoever -- at which point I find myself the one she's trying to persuade. I don't like girls so aggressive that they're the ones removing my shirt, you know. I prefer to remove their clothes and remove mine along the way.

I guess it depends on what you want though. Anyone who is truly willing to lay their hands and lips on another person with the intent of sleeping with them on a first meeting isn't usually the type to take sex so seriously. I don't either. I slept with my wife on the first date and I still married her. I see sex as another form of chatting and getting to know a person. But I like to initiate.
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- chriscdi
  +1 y
  so you dont like getting effortless sex?
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  The short-term, absolutely. And maybe I am coming off very ignorant right now but in the long-term, I never met girls who are aggressive like this who don't want you to take control at some point... and I mean even in innocent ways like: boyfriend: What you want for dinner? girlfriend: I dunno, not sure what I want. boyfriend: What do you want? girlfriend: Whatever you want. boyfriend: I just want whatever you want. Let's do what you want. You get into that sort of dynamic and girls consistently lose interest in the long run in my opinion -- and that carries over to everything -- including sex. Even the aggressive girls who like men who are softened by their aggression -- at some point they turn girly. They want the guy who says, "This is where we're gonna go, this is what we're gonna do," in my experience. And I never had much luck with aggressive girls cause it's like a guessing game as to when you're supposed to do that.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  there's nothing ignorant about it, my dawg likes a challenge, nothing wrong with that lol
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- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  I'm a weird one though. I was completely open to sex on the first date. Who isn't unless they're so strongly bound by ethics that abstain before marriage? I was never bound by such ethics. I have a conscience but not that type of ethic. But I also desire long-term -- more than short-term satisfaction -- I'm thinking about the future all the time -- "investment" if you will over "spending" if we put it in ruthless terms. Every girl I dated, however misguided, was a potential "future wife" for me -- even the ones I picked up in bars and night clubs. And so I was looking for a dynamic I could handle -- the girls who get all touchy and completely unrestrained to me are ones I didn't think I could satisfy in the long run -- not the short run, mind you -- I can have a pep talk with my equipment and satisfy them that way -- but in the long run, I found those girls made it confusing to me how to make them happy over months, years.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  I didn't know how to be "manly" for them to put it plainly.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  that is interesting
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  Cheers well -- actually, I don't know if I like a challenge. It's just the girls I dated like this who was so aggressive and so eager to head to the bedroom like this turned out to be very easy in the short run but very difficult in the long run. I've never been wise. I'll marry a loose girl if a tramp stamp if it works out. It just never seemed like that worked so well for me. Maybe you need to be like a hardcore badass to continually satisfy those girls -- and the more difficult satisfaction for me is outside the bedroom. I'm not a hardcore badass. If people are eager to step up to the plate and lead, I'll follow. I'm the type who only steps up to lead when everyone else is reluctant to do so. That's where I find what little sense of badass I have. But you need to be a badass with most girls in my experience, and girls who are at least slightly reluctant not to jump into bed with you make it easier to be a badass.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  You don't summon your badass that takes control of situations and, in my experience, with those girls so eager to sleep with you ASAP, they'll like you -- maybe even adore you -- if your sexual skils are up to par. But soon it feels like you are boy toy -- and it's hard to know when to step up, be manly. The more sub types of girls make it easier to know when to do that -- even if they are just playing along.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  thats not true bro, im a good guy and i got girls coming from left and right, you just gotta be a guy willing to protect, love and support them and you gucci, not only that, all these simps and horny bastards make it easier cause guys like us stand out, im not complaining lol
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  I have the horny bastard and a twist to the simp side. But I think a real simp understands what women want, or at least sorta. And none of my understanding of what women want in my younger experience suggests they want anything close to the stereotypical doormat simp. At some point, I've always found it important to maneuver myself in an executive position for long-term relationships. You gotta get it so when there's a difficult situation, the girl looks up to you to protect her. And it was tough for me, anyway, to ever find that situation with the type of girl who throws herself at you immediately.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  yea i can agree with that, simps know what girls want but dont know how to act around women, or they just come out as desperate and to be fair everyone is lowkey a simp, it all just depends on the girl 😂
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  For me, long-term, it's like I never wanted to be one of those pussy-whipped husbands. I am older so I got to see my share. And I saw even what I saw was a complete badass of a lady's man, construction worker, turn pussy-whipped when he dated this super aggressive girl. She tamed and domesticated him too much -- in ways that seem to dissatisfy them both. I don't know if what I'm saying makes much sense. I can't articulate it well. But girls who throw themselves on guys and tear off their shirts and wanna conquer the situation -- they don't let the guy conquer the situation. They don't let him become the captain of their own ship... which would be fine if they stayed happy with that in the long run. But I've never seen that. Those girls usually lose interest and want a man who is the captain of his own ship. And it's hard to be captain of your own ship if you aren't setting the terms, like when to sleep together, where to date, what to have for dinner, where to send your kids to school.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  You sleep with a girl on the first date on your own terms and now you are being captain of your own ship. And that can work -- works so far for me (married over ten years -- won my wife jamming emergency stop button on an elevator on the first date and kissing her). She looks at you that way and that can work for decades. But not if she sees you like prey -- to tear off your clothes and have her way with you. Unless you can tame that beast of her, probably she will lose interest.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  yea best way is to deny sex every once in a while, it would make her crave sex and keep her interested, she would enjoy it more when she gets it, reason they lose interest is cause you are predictable, predictable is boring
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  That's getting a bit manipulative... which I'm not opposed to at all! I get a bit manipulative about gifts. It's like if you give your girl flowers every week, that's gonna spoil the hell out of her. She is gonna see it as routine, not special. It's not gonna be like the Hollywood thing where she sniffs the flowers every week and thinks she has the most wonderful husband/boyfriend. Instead, she's gonna take the routine flowers as a gesture of love... and get pissed if the guy misses even one week. "You don't love me anymore?" So what you do in my opinion is you get her flowers when she least expects, like not when she's pissed off. Just be an asshole when she's pissed. Then she can storm off and complain to all her friends or whatever. Then when she least expects, get some flowers for her -- like once every two years. Then she will think she has the most amazing guy ever. Well, that is more strategic stuff -- but with love. But I do think this is important too.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  well the female mind its different, men are much more simple, its either that or she will get bored, what can i say, its not manipulative cause if you aren't in the mood then you aren't, we both know that if she wasn't in the mood she would do something she didn't want to do, its more like playing your cards right, not rushing to anything, being your own person making your own decisions
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  I just pulled that stunt with the wife the other day. She had a really hard day and complained to me about it. I sorta ignored her because I was watching Star Trek episodes and Data was being really funny. So I was like, "Yeah, that seems tuff. Uh-huh-uh-huh." Then she said she said she was tired and kissed me and went to bed while I was like, "Uh-huh," and kept watching Star Trek episode. Then while she was sleeping, I snuck off to store at midnight and got her all these chocolates and her favorite food and I drew like a retarded crayon drawing like, "LOVE YOU!" Then she adored me the next morning. Actually I was trying to sleep and she kept kissing my cheek and ear and I was like, "Arrrgh! I'm trying to sleep!" And she's like, "You're the best husband I ever had! I love you so much!" And I was like, "Go away woman, I'm trying to sleep!" Strategy -- you know.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  >> being your own person making your own decisions I'm into a tiny bit of "ethical manipulation". :-D If I was being my genuine self, I'd shower girls with love and affection. My genuine self might be a simp. It'd actually want to buy girls drinks left and right at bars. But that don't work in my experience. It won't work in the sense of making them happy in the long run with me. That is why I call it "ethical". You do a tiny bit of manipulative stuff like reverse psychology here and there, cultivate her idea of you that you're a completely insensitive prick and borderline retarded and stubborn, and that's how you set her up to love you... by defying the expectations here and there. But I've never found any long-term strategy successful with a girl who is like a beast and wants to jump on my dick. Maybe I just failed to find one or lacked the sufficient degree of dominance to continually impress her for months on end.
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  i guess you do whats best for you then lol
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  I don't really think this is true but sometimes it's like the girls who are the easiest in the short run are the most difficult in the long run... and vice versa.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  Cheers! Yeah, I don't know if what works for me works so well for other guys. And I'm really confused if other guys wanted what I wanted when I was younger. On this point though: >> thats not true bro, im a good guy and i got girls coming from left and right, you just gotta be a guy willing to protect, love and support them and you gucci, not only that, all these simps and horny bastards make it easier cause guys like us stand out, im not complaining lol I think you got it -- in a good, conscientious way. Well, I traveled all over the world when I was younger. I lived out of suitcases in hotels for the most part. So I met all sorts of women and the challenge to me wasn't "STRs", but "LTRs". It never seemed a challenge to me to find some girl who would be so happy with me for six weeks. 3 months or so was tougher. And 10 years seemed impossible until I started becoming more "strategic" in my thoughts. :-D
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  im too high right now to read all that lol
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  Me too! Well, just drunk. But high-five!
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  lmao

Most Helpful Guy

Apope16 Editor
+1 y
my longest relationships have come with women who had sex with me after the first date. having sex right away indicates high attraction and interest in you. it does not mean a slut. it is not a bad sign. it is a GOOD sign. YOu need to have sex with your girl early on and often. set the tone for the relationship as physical. sex creates chemicals of bonding. it is called pair bonding. make your mark on her physically and she is less likely to cheat.
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- chriscdi
  +1 y
  it can also show a high sex drive and lack of self control, its why im asking
- Apope16
  +1 y
  That might be true. I think you make a good point. But I dont think you should judge someone based on when they have sex with you. There are many people who have a high sex drive and can have healthy relationships. I would say that most girls in college ride the cock carousel during their 20s. Most girls sleep around and experience sleeping with many different guys during their 20s. This is normal. By the time you start dating a woman who wants to settle down she will be in her 30s lying about how many long term relationships and sexual partners she has had. I would take her number and multiply by 3. If she says she has slept with 5 guys it is probably 15 or 20. There is nothing wrong with sleeping with a lot of people. There is nothing wrong with a high sex drive. The problem is women lie because they are called sluts and made to feel guilty about enjoying the pleasure of sex. Remember guys. Women are just as thirsty and horny as men if not more so. They are just good at hiding their flings and stuff on dating apps and with secrets among girlfriends. They will pick guys off campus or in a different city to sleep with so nobody knows.

Most Helpful Girls

Devilofangel Xper 5
+1 y
It's so hard to say. Every relationship is different. For instance I just slept with this guy after a month of knowing him on our 3rd date. I was single and abstent for 2 years and he got out of a 5 year relationship half a year ago. We've been sleeping together every time we meet up since but, there is usually a huge gap in time due to job constraints on his end. Slowly we seem to be growing to know each other. I felt it happened, at least on my end, because it has been so long and... I do trust him. We aren't boyfriend and girlfriend to my knowledge... at least not as of yet (I'm hoping we will become that. I do really like him.) I'm enjoying sex with him and growing fond of him. Hopefully the feeling is mutual.
0 1 0 0
- JuliaStyles
  +1 y
  @devilofangelGood luck on that. Until then you are just a friend with benefits. Unfortunately some men have a hard time committing to anything but sex.
- Devilofangel
  +1 y
  @JuliaStyles Thanks for your optimism.
- JuliaStyles
  +1 y
  Always glad to state the facts mam. Fact is that someone just out of a 5 year relationship is in no way over it yet - unless it was shit - and still needs time before he will be ready to move on. So there is not much chance that he is ready to commit to another by rebounding into another. If he does he won't likely put everything into it. So sex is probably all he would be interested until he is ready for a new relationship. I hope you will have a different outcome but the odds of a lasting relationship from rebounding is not good.
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- Devilofangel
  +1 y
  @JuliaStyles Maybe you're right.. maybe you're not. The difference between me and his ex is, I'm here and we aren't long distance. Sure he works a lot but unlike her... I'm understanding of it and I'm not pushing him to do anything. Only time will tell what happens. All I can do is be myself. If he chooses to not keep me, so be it. There is no reward without risk. It ain't no better to be safe than sorry.
- JuliaStyles
  +1 y
  That is always a consideration. You don't get anywhere without trying.
Newhead Xper 7
+1 y
Coming from someone who's had one night stands that turned into something more because no one can hit it and quit it with me "wink". I still say it's a bad idea, it is not a spiritually clean thing to do, nor is it morally right. Sex is better with the right person, no matter how good you might have thought the one night stand was, wait until you meet someone you actually love and have a deep connection with. And there is very little chance that someone you met some hours ago is the one, and even if they are you will be happier if you wait.
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- chriscdi
  +1 y
  alright, seems like legit information 🤔

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What Girls & Guys Said

9 15

JuliaStyles Xper 7
+1 y
If you are talking a first date, that is not a relationship. A relationship develops over time. If it's a first date she would seem a little slutty in my opinion and probably has an account on some hookup sites. But if you are on those sites then you must also be looking for sex so you might just be a match.
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Paolaa988 Explorer
+1 y
Yeah that's really soon to br wanting sex..
1 2 0 0
- Paolaa988
  +1 y
  Be**
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  sounds legit
iseekpinetrees Guru
+1 y
Yes if u want a relationship. She just wants friends with benefits
0 0 0 0
TruthBringer Yoda
+1 y
I'll leave you with this: Something that is easy to get, will easily go.
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turkey0 Xper 3
+1 y
It's okay if you're not emotional
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- chriscdi
  +1 y
  i need more clarification on this
- turkey0
  +1 y
  I went to my ex-boyfriend's house on the second meeting. And we had superficial sex, it had been 2 days since we met. Because I was very enthusiastic and curious. I think that girl is also eager and curious. But when you make love from the first day, the relationship is like a fuckbody, it's just a meeting to make love, it can be a problem when you make love without creating feelings, at least for me
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  oh alright makes a lot of sense, yea i see what you mean, thanks 💯
kkirk4442 Yoda
+1 y
I would find it a bad sign for the relationship.
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Sevenpointfive Master
+1 y
into the relationship? you mean she held out that long and you put up with it?
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niya_2006 Xper 2
+1 y
I dunno
0 2 0 0
Gwenhwyfar Master
+1 y
Probably means either it’s just a hookup or she’s gonna be super clingy
0 1 0 1
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  hookup i thought of, clingy, i didn't 🤔
- Gwenhwyfar
  +1 y
  Oh god yeah
pigoat Guru
+1 y
Depends how you wanna go about it

For me i would love it because I'm a virgin
1 1 0 1
- pigoat
  +1 y
  An older virgin at that
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  fair enough
Kabluie Guru
+1 y
One of my best relationships we had sex the first night, there was sexual tensions leading up to it. It just meant we were compatible. I like if the sparks are there, why wait.
0 0 0 0
chubbycrow Xper 5
+1 y
Nah lol some girls (luckily my girlfriend) are just insatiably horny. most aren't but some are.
some j aren't horny and won't sleep forever
3 1 0 0
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  yea you never know if the girl has been waiting forever to get a boyfriend so she can have sex
Aakash_Hangargi Guru
+1 y
I guess some people wanna test ride b4 they could move it any further.

Or they just want sex if not anything with handsome hunk
0 1 0 0
Arichip Yoda
+1 y
No I did before since we just felt a good connection so I don't know I guess its ok
0 1 0 0
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  depends on the situation i guess
Just_Me89 Xper 6
+1 y
It's not something I would do; but I wouldn't say it's a ad sign. I know couple who have been married for years and the girl initiated sex on the first date.
0 0 0 0
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  fair enough missy
Hispanic-Cool-Guy Master
+1 y
Bruh, trust me that's not the kinda girl you would want to be in a relationship with. That's a big red flag of the bat.
2 1 0 0
Twalli Master
+1 y
Oral is fine. I don't insert my penis below her waist until at least 3 months in.
1 2 1 1
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  fair enough 😂😂😂
DaddyDevn Xper 4
+1 y
Not necessarily bad, some want sex before the relationship lol
1 1 0 0
- chriscdi
  +1 y
  yea and thats not a good sign, or doesn't seem like one at least lol
AFellowWeeb Xper 6
+1 y
Yes.
0 0 0 0
Davidstarboy Xper 5
+1 y
It is benefit for me because she is ready to give that pussy to me and I'm a lucky mf to have that privilege.
1 1 0 0
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