#Scenario If you started dating someone today, whats the longest you’re willing to wait for sex and what needs to be done until then?

[DizzyDesii]

I’m pretty patient in terms of waiting for sex, and am not comfortable having actual sex within the first 6 months... honestly, not even with the first year. But if i feel he’s the one, i’d prob give in sometime after the 6 month mark. I mean, my first ex didn't get it til after that and one other didn't get it until after a year and a half (because we were both trying to wait til marriage but failed lol). Still, for the 1st month or two, I am occupied with pg-13 type foreplay until then. My favorite things are kissing, masturbating eachother, getting these tits sucked, phone sex and hickeys. However, I’d consider oral after the 3 month mark. Most men these days, won’t settle for this, especially if i ever want to be considered for marriage. Most boys would, but theyre just looking to hookup. I’m fine being single but if i get in a relationship, thats all i’m willing to offer for the first 6 months until i’m comfortable and in love. So what do you yourself need in order to wait, and how long would you wait for whoever you date?
#FeelFreeToList #CumFindOut

[Apope16]

I have dated a lot of women. I consider myself a ladies man to be honest. I don't really have a "rule" of women to have sex. I live in the moment with chemistry. I would say 25% of the time I have had sex on the first date. The majority of the time when I have had sex on the first date they resulted in being my LONGEST relationships. One of them was a girlfriend I ended up living with for 2 years. I would say about 74% of the time I have had sex on the 2nd or 3rd date. Again, this has been pretty standard. As you can see about 99% of the time I am having sex by date #3.

Only a small amount of time 1% have a waited longer than 3 dates to have sex. I really liked a girl and I think waited 6 dates which was almost a month to have sex. I just waited for the vibe to feel right. When we finally did have sex I realized that she probably wanted to have sex much earlier because she was hungry for it.

I guess the point I am making is the longest I would wait is no more than 6 dates. There comes a point where if the woman doesn't want to have sex she either has a religious hang up or an emotional issue or she doesn't like you romantically. In my 6 date scenario, she never refused to have sex with me. I simply didn't ask. I set up other dates outside my apartment and she was young and eagerly waiting for me to invite her over to fuck.

My philosophy at age 33 years old and dating a lot of women is to make the sex ask as soon as possible. To set the terms very clearly that I am not some Mr. Nice guy Beta male playing games. Women deserve honesty about a man's intentions. Not only that, women are just as horny as men. They like sex and they want it from you. Stop wasting a woman's time guys. Seriously. If the vibe is right and you are making out on the first date? As her to have a bottle of wine at your place. If you just get a regular kiss on date #1 then on date #2 invite her to your place for dinner and ask her to bring a bottle of wine. No more playing games. She will know what up and a woman is just begging for a guy to take the lead. To treat sex as no big deal so she doesn't feel slutty and feels like a woman. You know?

So these days. I ask for sex by date #3 by inviting them for dinner or wine at my place. No later.

[DizzyDesii]

I guess i have the religious hangup lol

[Apope16]

hey and that is okay. if you are religious and want to wait to have sex. make that clear to a man. the right man will be on your terms. there are a lot of other sexual things you can do other than intercourse too. I had a relgiious chic who wanted to be a virgin humping me with just underwear on until she orgasm'd. she is still a virgin to this day at 33 years old.

[DizzyDesii]

Lmao i be doin that 😂 love dryhumping

[jhnny1331]

My wife passed away last year and we're together for 17 and a half years but we dated for two and a half yearsI was 29 she was 30 neither one of us have been married before or have had kids from a previous relationship in fact she still lived at home I had my own apartment she didn't stay the night. We waited till we were married we fooled around in the meantime but we we waited I don't tell people this often but I was her first. I respected her wishes and any fooling around that we did do was up to her and how she felt about it and what she wanted to do in fact I never even instigated any Acts I left up to her entirely if she wanted to do something that was up to her and she let me know just being with her was enough sex is important but not the most important thing in relationship

[DizzyDesii]

Wow this is beautiful. Sounds like you had a great marriage as well

[Anonymous]

I’ve waited for a little longer than a year with the only man I’ve ever been with lol I was like 17 though and we were long distance so I needed time to get used to him. One dude tried to pressure me and it didn’t go well.


Now it’d depend on how much time we spend together but considering we go on a date every weekend and get together to watch a movie maybe once a week I would probably be going down on him by the second month lol but I’d have sex with him when I’m comfortable really and I have this weird thing where it’s all stages to me. We must’ve had a few make-out sessions to let him go down on me or finger me. Then as he gets used to how my body feels and I get used to his, i’d want to take a shower with him or something I mean I wouldn’t want to just throw my body at him and go full out, going from kissing to sex is just so uncomfortable to me. I think i just want him to get to know me little by little since my body really is far from perfect and I don’t wanna bombard him with all my imperfections and give him the opportunity to cut it off early on, in the process of getting to know my body. I feel if we was to have sex no man would turn a woman down lol like it’d be too late. But then if he was grossed out by her body he wouldn’t call her again. That’s what I don’t wanna be. I would feel so cheap and used that it’d drive me crazy.

[DizzyDesii]

Yea i can relate to this. The first pressured me and the other we took our time

[Opinion Owner]

I never had sex with the one that pressured me. But you were in love with the guy so that makes it a little better.

[DizzyDesii]

Yea i was in love with both. Thats rhe only reasons i truly gave in. Plus with the second we were about to get engaged. I fell for the bs. That engagement got called off when he thought i was pregnant

[Opinion Owner]

I can never tell if it’s true love that’s why I like to wait, I never know if it’s not just the sparks in the beginning lol I need to know the man is worth it. But that’s crazy calling off engagement cause of something like that

[DizzyDesii]

Yea he lied about being ready for fatherhood and when he thought i was pregnant, he backed out. We waited a year and a half before having sex. But yea he wasn't reasy for fatherhood once reality set in

[yofuknutz]

A year-and-a-half and he backed out yeah you've got to work on your Technique girl or somebody in Your Friends and Family scared him off

[DizzyDesii]

@yofuknutz no he was afraid to become a dad plus his parents was hounding him about marriage/parenting young. So if anything his own fam scared him off

[Opinion Owner]

@DizzyDesii this is crazy, I’m so sorry you had to go through that, must’ve been pretty hard.

[yofuknutz]

His own family wow I guess you got a break then maybe they want to keep him for themselves

[DizzyDesii]

@yofuknutz they absolutely do. Newring breakup we found out that his sister may actually be his mom. So im glad i escaped those incestual fcks

[yofuknutz]

Oh no hell no another Ted Bundy situation oh no hell no drop your bra strap and run for the Border girl get away from these people oh hell no did I say that already hell yes

[DizzyDesii]

@yofuknutz lol this was back in 2018. I escaped them 😂

[yofuknutz]

And did not follow you around do you believe in Jesus get on the floor and thank him you've dodged a serious ass bullet I like to shake your hand

[Anonymous]

I think we had sex after 2 weeks or was it 3 weeks of dating? I don't remember.
He constantly talked about marriage.
He proposed after 3 months of dating and we were married 3 months later.

Honestly he was my first everything and i didn't know what i was doing. I felt old at the time and everything kind of went super fast. by the way we met when we both turned 24 and was married at 24.5 years old. So... I guessed i waited till i was 24 to have sex.

[DizzyDesii]

Wow so glad y'all married 😍

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah me too. I can say no regrets on whom i chose to have sex with.

[jennifer_bloom]

I wait until marriage but I’m willing to marry early to shorten the wait - I usually do most of the getting to know the person stuff through flirting and friendship while the dating stage is just in my mind, a short dress rehearsal for marriage but I’ve had bad experiences with poor communicators so I think it’s important that the person is tested before a commitment of marriage happens.

[DizzyDesii]

I feel you on that. I don't know if i could marry within less than 6 months of knowint eachother. I preferred we date a year to a year and a half and be engaged 6 months. But now that im getting older, I don't know

[jennifer_bloom]

Your not as old as me and it is important you find a good conscience and good ethical system when you choose who to date. You don’t want a man that will abuse or use you or a man who will cheat on you. Don’t rush things - your still ver young.

[DizzyDesii]

I dont rush. But I've always wanted my kids before i turn 30. I wanted to be married before i have kids. However, if i stay single, i’ll do ivf to get my kids before 30

[Jamie05rhs]

@jennifer_bloom You shouldn't rush things, either, sis. I'm old, too, but that doesn't mean I want to rush a relationship, let alone a marriage.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I don't have a set time... It depends on the person, the amount of time invested in getting to know each other, when the level of trust is there, and that differs with different people...

[DizzyDesii]

Yea true. I just know i gotta be in love at the least

[razelove]

Oh, you rascal you, I almost got mixed up there. Trick question, if we're "dating" we already had sex and are continuing to, or why would I be putting any titles on anything?

[DizzyDesii]

Lol trick question how?

[razelove]

Well, going out on a date or two isn't dating, having some sort of commitment is, even if it isn't exclusivity, just to answer when the other calls/texts and make time for each other. That takes talking, and meeting up a time or two to establish. By that point you've already been on dates though you aren't "dating", and typically I've had sex or moved on. I realize everyone handles that differently, like the no sex until marriage crowd, but I just don't see the point of showing so much time, attention and resources to someone unless I'm getting attention and relief back too.

[razelove]

Moved on can be friendzoning too to clarify. It isn't like the movie 48 hours where if I don't get some resolution by then I'm burning everything to the ground, just crossing that person off my list as someone to date, have sex with, or spend too much effort on unless it's playing video games, or our kids play together, something like that.

[DizzyDesii]

I talk to guys for 1-3 months before even going on a date. After the date we become official. I’d have to up to 6 months of OFFICIAL dating before sex

[razelove]

Yeah, so we could chat, be acquaintances or friends, but I would believe you were playing games and would not wait that long. Whatever it is you have to offer, I could figure out the same thing from other women in that same time period with little effort. In the past I would have said I was waiting and just done that anyway, but now that kind of thing is just too tedious. It's no offense to you, just when it comes to sex and relationships we are very different in our approach and expectations. The longest I've gone was 3 months because I was isolated from women during boot camp. To wait more than twice as long is logical to you, but absolutely ludicrous to me.

[DizzyDesii]

Like i said, i have to be in love first. Im not gonna be in love in less than 6 months

[JuliaStyles]

Some people don't even go with the 3 date rule before jumping into bed, and that can sometimes wind up bad.

Here I come! Shiiittttt!

Hot damn! Getting sex on the first date!

[DizzyDesii]

Hahhaah

[OlderAndWiser]

Five years ago, I was in a relationship for about six months before we had sex. That was no nudity, no fondling, no hand jobs, no oral sex, nothing more than passionate kissing. And we were dating at least once every weekend and sometimes twice. I thought she was worth it so we waited. I'm not sure how much longer I would have waited, but maybe another 6 months.

[DizzyDesii]

Thats very good tho. I say its ideal

[JuliaStyles]

Six months and nothing serious happened like a committed relationship? Do you fee like you wasted your time? So what told you it wasn't for you and was it you or her that did it for you?

[OlderAndWiser]

@JuliaStyles We eventually began having a sexual relationship, I spent weekends at her house, and we were extremely compatible in many ways. But she never fell in love with me as I loved her and I realized that it would never happen, so I broke up with her and walked away from the last woman I loved.

[yofuknutz]

She might be incapable of love and it has nothing to do with you the best thing you can do is move on which sounds like you have with respect I Ask of this was she good in the sack you know I'm asking for a friend?

[OlderAndWiser]

@yofuknutz Yes, our sexual adventures were satisfying but only occurred about once a week, not as frequent as I would have preferred. We enjoyed spending time together. Yes, I concluded that she was incapable of giving love and I deserve to have a partner who loves me as much as I love her, so I left in hopes of finding a better woman.

[yofuknutz]

Not trying to sound like a misogynist jerk but it does deserve to be answered could you have kept going with her while looking for somebody else emphasis on the while part? And after you guys had sex she make you wait once a week did she allow you the full girlfriend experience you know the ability to ejaculate inside her this is quite interesting.

[OlderAndWiser]

@yofuknutz Yes, our sexual experiences - when we had them - were very satisfying. I could have continued dating her indefinitely but I decided to not do that. The best way to find a good partner for a LTR is to be ready and available and I needed time to recover from the relationship with Ivy before I moved forward.

[yofuknutz]

That's a very interesting take the need to recover I never thought of it like that

[JuliaStyles]

I guess some women, as well as men, have no idea what love is or what holds a relationship together. Hint - it is not sex as that is mostly a perk of true love.

[OlderAndWiser]

@JuliaStyles Right. Sex feels great, and it does make a couple feel emotionally closer to each other, but. . . there are 168 hours in every week. How much of that time is devoted to sex? Depending on the couple, probably not more than 5 hours, and probably closer to 1-2 hours per week.

[yofuknutz]

That is pure tragedy that's less than 1% good analysis spot on amigo

[ohshee]

I think I'm very patient like if we started dating this morning at 8 am. And it's 1136 am right now I'm think noon is perfect

[DizzyDesii]

Haha :D

[CriticalDiscourse]

I don't personally like the idea of moralizing when/if to have sex. To me, what matters is consent first and whether or not that consent is ongoing.

For me? I will have sex with someone I'm in a relationship whenever I feel comfortable. I don't have a timeline for it. Maybe we'll be together for a couple or months, maybe longer? Maybe a few weeks? I don't know. It's all based on what feels right.

[David7825]

Hello can you chat with me

[DizzyDesii]

I understand. I just have to be in love first

[David7825]

What

[DizzyDesii]

@David7825 talking to critical

[psychoticanimallover]

Mick, Dick, Rick.

[DizzyDesii]

Girl stop spamming 🤣

[psychoticanimallover]

Harry, Larry, Gary.

[BlacklightShade]

8 inches is the longest I'd wait.

[DizzyDesii]

Lmao 🤣

[yofuknutz]

Girth or length? I'm asking for a friend

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

Forever.
I'd make it clear we'd have sex only to procreate, and even then she could do it in vitro instead of molesting me.

[DizzyDesii]

I also feel sex is for procreation but pleasure is the secondary purpose in my opinion

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

I don't feel much pleasure honestly, so I don't see a purpose in it

[Itsroxxie]

How can you not enjoy it? Ejaculation is pleasant for all guys I think...

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

@Itsroxxie I don't come 9/10 times.

[Jjpayne]

I'd say cuddling also right away. Like a date thing but making out a little bit later and sex for me, either at marriage or right before marriage when I know we are leading to it. Like having a good moment after going out and we get back to her place and we are just both feeling it's the right time so I'm willing to have some flexibility but I'd want to know we were exclusive and serious by then

[Jjpayne]

*almost right away

[DizzyDesii]

Right

[ShortCircuit]

If I started dating someone now, the minimum amount of time I would want to wait is 2 years, but I would be willing to wait as long as 5 years. All I would need until then is nonsexual physical contact (hugging, kissing, etc.).

[DizzyDesii]

Wow amazing

[Birdlegs]

I literally could wait a year and beyond. Sex isn’t super important to me I won’t even be attracted to a girl until I really know her

[DizzyDesii]

This is beautiful to hear

[Dongtai]

I don’t even commit anymore until a sexual relationship has been established, but that’s because sex is one of my needs. It’s one of the ways I express my feelings. The longest I’ve waited has been a month, which I think is a fair amount of time.


6 months though is ridiculous. There’s no way I’d wait half a year just to have sex with a woman. Move in with me? Sure. That’s a fair amount of time to wait before giving her a key. But putting a definite time table on when you’ll have sex with someone has always seemed weird to me. Sex shouldn’t be and usually isn’t the glue of a healthy relationship.

[DizzyDesii]

I say that because i know i won't be “in love” until sometime near 6 months and well i definitely ain't having sex until then

[Dongtai]

That’s actually a really good perspective. For me, if the relationship hasn’t crossed sexual boundaries I don’t feel like I’m “hers”. I don’t feel embraced as “her man”. It feels like a formal friendship. I can develop deep feelings for a woman without sex, but sexual rejection makes me feel like those developing feelings are being rejected, regardless of what she might say. Sex is part of my love language. Without it I don’t feel fully connected/accepted to a woman. I’ve been in relationships where the sex wasn’t present and I didn’t feel fully connected until we had sex. It’s hard to explain. I don’t believe I could be completely connected to a woman without sex.

[Hans222]

Haha 45 years Desi. You know what I mean 😉

[DizzyDesii]

Haha :)

[laki36]

Dated a virgin. We went through all the fun stuff and got to sex after 1.5 years. She was so enjoyable.
And we are together for more than 15 years, married for 8.
For your scenario: 3 to 6 months minimum (meaning I would not push for sex in relationship before that). If she is enjoyable, fun to be with and shows potential for fun also in bed, even longer.

[DizzyDesii]

This is good to hear

[slatyb]

I certainly wouldn't wait a year. A couple of months sure. Beyond that I would wonder if the woman had any interest in sex. I wouldn't beg her for sex, I would just say "I don't think this is going to work."

[DizzyDesii]

Totally respect that

[slatyb]

But if she were an honest and considerate person, she would have told me her feelings about sex before we even had the first date, instead of wasting her time and mine.

[DizzyDesii]

I def tell before then

[DanaeAdam5]

It really depends on the person. I honestly don't have a limit towards how many months/years we have to be together to have sex. When feel like I'm ready (and if the person feels ready as well of course!) I would do it.

Like I'm the type of person that sometimes has sex on the first or second date and other times waits from 4-7 months.

[DizzyDesii]

I hear ya. But no i gotta be in love first

[Avicenna]

I'd be willing to wait until marriage for the the right person, but in general, for a woman who's my age, a few weeks is plenty.

[DizzyDesii]

Lol ok

[Avicenna]

You might be surprised how horny women are in their 40s and 50s

[DizzyDesii]

Lol believe me i know. My grandma 67 and still tryna get laid since her hubby won't cave

[Avicenna]

Wow, OK, I haven't been with a woman over 58, but I can believe it. And the older ladies will hit on a guy she finds attractive.

[DizzyDesii]

Absolutely. Theyre not shy at all. I’d say it starts at age 25 honestly

[Avicenna]

To some extent yes, but it really gets crazy around late 40s. I get hit on by women that age a lot.

[DizzyDesii]

Its that menopause and hot flashes lol

[Avicenna]

Yeah, but the most aggressive ones were past menopause (they were in their 50s). Not to be cocky or anything, but I'm told I look a decade less than my age, so that might have something to do with it as well.

[Egirl28]

I want to be in love before i have sex!! I still want kissing and other things before sex.

[DizzyDesii]

Yes i agree