Man-child boyfriend making me fantasize about women more?

Question

My boyfriend and I started dating in our teens and we are still together at 25. I have never been with anyone else except one girl before him who took my virginity. He's gorgeous and great in bed but I have lost all attraction for him because I feel like his mother.

He always had a mountain of laundry, takes lazy shortcuts with the chores so I have to do even more of them, won't look after a pet he begged for us to get, dresses badly most of the time, is super unorganized and flaky, and I feel like I have to help him manage his life like I'm a single mom and he's my teenaged son.

He always complains about his pizza delivery job but he won't look for something else, I know that's a big ask during a pandemic but I literally did just that and he acted all jealous of my new job! Instead of being jealous make an attempt at least!

Anyway, I am very resentful of how much he leans on me for everything without putting forth much effort in return. Then I've had all of these very independent, mature, organized, dependable women flirting with me! It's like they can sense that I'm falling out of love FAST and they know it's their moment to strike! The worst part is that it is getting to me, I've had dreams of one of these women, who's 30, doing things to me. I still want her to touch me after I'm awake and out of the dream.

I feel so bad but my boyfriend exhausts and drains me and I feel like I'm dragging him kicking and screaming into young-adulthood and it's so unattractive. It feels incestuous to want him sexually at this point, I'm basically his mom! But these other women are so put-together and polished and dependable, spending time with them feels refreshing and intriguing instead of when I'm with my boyfriend and it feels like parenting. Has anyone else experienced this with a manchild? I do still care for him but my sexuality has left the building and it's skipping along behind some business woman's coat-tails!

ohshee · Accepted Answer

I am really glad you posted this I have always wanted to understand this I have friends that I watch there wives doing the same thing and have always asked myself why would these women allow this I have talk to one of my friends wives after they split and asked her ,, you sound just like her and about being with another women as we talked more I felt she did want to be with a women but also used it for a little bit if a cover up on what she wanted then asked me if she could come over some time I told her yes but it was a bad idea because we both know where we would end up. I really wanted that but I told her we can't he's my FRIEND and I wouldn't like it if the table was turned and he did it so I can't ,, i told her dye her hair change her name i would think about it,, i hear you tho and i kinda seen what your going threw with others i also have another friend she says she's single sges on the east coast im on the west but be talk on the phone i dont hsve her number she calls me with a private. Number and it's all good but I believe she is GOING threw the same thing and call me to just release we have phone sex and its better than reall sex ,, now thats hard to believe but it is the truth. I think because I can't take her away from what's she's goibg threw you should try this to you won't believe what you feel after words my friend voice changes kinda of I can feel she feels like a new person. You have to experience something before u can under stand it

Wiredone · Accepted Answer

You two need to sit down and talk about this. First, a pizza delivery job is for extra cash, not your main income. He needs a real job. Does he know how to do the laundry? Maybe nobody showed him how to use the machines. Show him how to use it and Tell him he's in charge of the laundry. Tell him if he doesn't grow up and start helping you out, your going to leave him.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Lol you should probably dump him now. You can't do nothing with a man child.

Twalli · Answer

A surprising number of guys are okay with their girlfriend being with another girl. They realize that a girl can provide some things they can't. At the same time they know that their girlfriend will always return to them because no girl can have the same mind of sex with her. Your boyfriend may not approve, but you may be surprised if you bring it up. On the other hand he may ask for a threesome.

Valnac · Answer

You just answered your own question. Dump the whiney boy, and get whatever makes you wet.

msc545 · Answer

You need to break up with him.

Knightoffire · Answer

You would be amazed how some man are a lot closer to those women you speak of... I just think your subconsious mind is more drawn and tied to women because your first experience was with a woman but as a personal advice in the long run try to keep an open and neutral mind it is not unlikely to find a lot of passion maturity that would led to a complete and complex happiness in the arms of a man.

berserk945 · Answer

Tell him your frustration and if he fails to grow up then dump him.

harry7825 · Answer

Are you a maid service for him I think so

Anonymous · Answer

Put demands on him. Like no sex before laundry. If he is a child then... raise him i guess.

Anonymous · Answer

Well no one likes a lazy ass person, you should rather leave him or change him because he can't be a responsible husband too If you are planning for that

Man-child boyfriend making me fantasize about women more?

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