Just had the worst sex with my boyfriend, is it me or him?

[Anonymous]

So me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now and normally the sex is okay.. But this time it was really bad. Thinking it's partially my fault but, I don't really get when he initiates it. So usually he will just make me suck him off or initiate it when I'm not in the mood. Also most of the time whenever we do have sex he doesn't do ANY foreplay. I mean he won't even touch me down there. Just kisses my neck. I've talked to him before about this before and everytime a he says I don't do any foreplay or he's mad that he's the one who has to turn me on. That's his answer everytime. So basically I have to do it myself. He may also have a porn addiction but I'm not sure.
Anyways last night I was on top (which will be the last time I ever do that) and he always has to use a condom. I got myself ready since he can't do it for me. But then he was completely soft! So I couldn't put it in! And then got mad at me and insulted me saying this your first d*ck? It was the WORST. And the whole time it's like he didn't even enjoy it then just ignored me the rest of the night... so now he's blaming me basically for his issue.. or do I not turn him on? He even laughed at me while I was on top... like really? What's his deal?

[ChrisMaster69]

Hmm sounds like he has something going on in his mind.

yeah could be porn addiction or he thinks about something else, however the not wanting to do foreplay etc could be a few things.

personally, I would be thinking about a change of boyfriend, this type of thing can lead to longer term issues.

sex is supposed to be a mutual experience with trust etc.

Not what you are going through.

it’s sounds like he has something going on, I can think what it could be but either way, if he is not receptive to discussing it, I would seriously move on.

[Asker]

Yes I told him it's a mutual thing and he says I don't give him foreplay when he forces me to everytime we get intimate.. or says that I don't want to. I'm sorry if it doesn't excited me to have the same sex over and over, give him a bj, and not get anything in return.

[ChrisMaster69]

That’s pretty shocking from my point of view on how relationships are, the trust, respect etc, Force has no place in a relationship (apart from if role play). I would definitely be looking to leave or leave his balls on the table one morning as you slam the door behind you ( I have a flair for the dramatic).

[PrudentGuy]

40+ but when I read the Details, I thought he was 20+.

Hence I think the issues are more than mere ED or foreplay or physical.

You wrote nothing about your relationship except the sex and the bickering thereafter.

Perhaps think beyond porn. He's 40+ hence i think he knows enough about porn and masturbation.

It probably lies in his love for you and perhaps, like others wrote, a side chick.

You should find out and then decide what to do. in my opinion, the reality could be heart breaking. Sorry...

[Asker]

I'm not sure but he gets mad at a lot of things... for no reason. Like if I wear makeup, if I'm texting, he's always on his phone but gets mad when I go on mine. And I'm never on my phone. He gets upset if I walk around naked yet he sits at home naked all day.. just a whole lot of double standards. He even got mad when I told him I was getting my first tattoo and he has several yet I'm not allowed apparently. Then he can't get over his ex and hides me from his social media but his ex is all over it.

[PrudentGuy]

And you allowed all these? Come on! You're a free woman. Please don't enslave yourself under him. Let go already and move on. That's my opinion, and I think it's for your best interest at heart.

[ftewolde]

The way he treats you (in this situation) is unacceptable regardless of whether he is going through something or not. Sex should be a mutual effort from both parties to please themselves AND their partners. He needa get his shit together.

[Asker]

he's at the age where this is him.. I needs to go

[OlderAndWiser]

This really doesn't sound very promising.

[HeyMikeyLikesIt]

Holy shit that guy sucks!!! What a fucking idiot. Now this is personal, but do you have any issues with your vagina? Like a bad smell or does he have a preference for public hair or something stupid that’s stopping him from eating you out, or at least fingering you and rubbing your clit? I know that would keep me away if there was a foul smell.
it sounds like you have a shitty relationship honestly. Like really shitty lol, he should be getting you off every time, or at least attempting to

[Asker]

I do have a issue with smell but I already fixed it months ago and no he's only done it once. Last night I heard him watching porn. I asked him if he was having fun lol and he acted like I couldn't hear it... he started a fight saying I was acting weird. And tried to cover up the fact that he's watching porn. He has a addiction. He doesn't even masturbate to it anymore. So he basically is trying to make me seem crazy and that it's not happening. Manipulative as hell. And he doesn't like doing any type of foreplay because he thinks that it shouldn't be his responsibility to turn me on. His words, not mine.

[JPrez]

OK, I'm gonna skip any advice and cut to the chase. Dump this guy. End of story.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

You are sexually incompatible, stay with him if you want to be miserable.

[bowenw]

I suggest he see his doctor regarding the erection issue and the two of you should go for couple's counselling. If he's not interested in going it's probably time for him to find a new girlfriend. You deserve someone that will treat you like a princess.

[Mr1derful]

It's him. Dump him! Sounds terrible all around and is not into your needs whatsoever!

[okeydoke]

Uhh sounds super awkward. You may just be really sexually incompatible.

[Asker]

Well he constantly watches porn and doesn't even masturbate while he watches it.

[Meatunnel69]

If his boner doesn't work that’s not your problem

[bullforcucks]

honestly not worth your time

break up with him or cheat on him

[Valnac]

Believe me it’s not you.
He is only thinking of his cock and doesn’t care anything about you.
Kick him to the curb and find yourself a real man that knows how to treat a woman.

[Anonymous]

How did you and him first meet each other? There are always going to be times when sex is awkward or just not the best

[Anonymous]

It's both of you Lol. Your his little f***hole. That's not to say he doesn't care about you at all ( i don't know i don't know him). But he can f*** you when he feels like it and doesn't really even have to talk you into it. That's ideal for a lot if guys. So Where's the problem? There isn't one from his side.
But YOU have allowed him to treat you this way by not demanding more of him.
Good luck.

[Asker]

I agree.. he has a porn addiction. And then acts like I don't know when I blatantly does it.

[Anonymous]

He sounds like whining baby, leave him because he is toxic, selfish and most importantly irresponsible person.

[Anonymous]

how literally how? you are 18-24 i suposse he is young as well. but how does he have erectile dysfunction at such young age bizzare.

[Asker]

No he's 40... but to be honest he told me about the porn issue so I'm 90% sure that it's because he's watching too much of it. He shows sign of porn addiction and even myself if I were to watch it all the time like that sex would probably become boring. I've even masturbated too much before and the same. thing happens to me dryness, hard to get aroused... porn is not really a healthy thing. it affected me several times in life and I'm 24 and a female.

[Opinion Owner]

y'all need to heal and take a break, thats my advice for you. ofcourse yalll genitals dont work if you overwork it and over do it. it will take healing. read nofap 90+ days plus quit porn. if that didn't work take 100 days if that didn't work than do 1000 no masturbation no sex no orgasm no porn etc..

[Opinion Owner]

So in short take a time off pleasuring each others genitals. it needs cooling. and oh yea wait for marriage he's 40 he should be married already..

[Asker]

Yeaaahhh... well I learned when it was too late that he had been divorced 3 times.. so they all left him. But luckily Im never marrying him.. or anyone for a good few years or at all. I'm learning marriage isn't what it's shacked up to be.