How long do you wait?

Mark987 Yoda

In a relationship with your significant other, how long do you wait till you have sex with that person?

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Superb Opinion

DrunkAss Yoda
+1 y
I never really did. The longest was a couple of months with my very first girlfriend, but more because I didn't know how to put on the moves. I wasn't waiting so much as confused about when to make the move.
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- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  Oh wait, I did one time for one long ago. Slipped my mind, but I did make a move on her on the very first date and we started making out and getting frisky, but then she stopped me and said I was moving too fast. So then I never tried that again on her until she practically invited me to my house and gave me permission.
- Mark987
  +1 y
  thanks for the honest answer
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  * invited herself to my house
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- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  Cheers. Well, I think it is kind of normal here in Japan for both people not to wait. We don't have the idea of abstinence before marriage here or this concept that a girl is so easy if things heat up quickly.
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  I love that you don’t have that stigma.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 Sometimes I think it hurts people more to have it because I think it encourages a lot more judgmental thinking but, perhaps more perniciously, deception... like young men telling virtuous women they love them when they don't at all to try to get into their pants, then possibly abandoning after they satisfied their sexual urges, or pressuring them and taking advantage of them. I think in societies that don't focus on such things, it encourages a more honest approach to dating and sexuality.
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  I think you are right. Honesty is always my policy. I hate being lied to. And I hate sex shaming.
- Mark987
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 YES... we are in 2021 no reason for that anymore
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  Amen
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 Another thing I find strange is people calling themselves "virgins" by seeking pretty much every loophole besides intercourse... like engaging actively in oral sex, anal, and possibly with numerous partners, but still "virgin". Well, I do not mean to disrespect people's religious beliefs but that seems very odd to me. Also, I've seen claims and even papers that those who abstain from marriage tend to have more successful marriages, but I suspect that the stigma has a part to do with that. Again we don't have this abstinence before marriage idea or the idea that virginity is sacred and Asian marriages are quite stable.
- DrunkAss
  +1 y
  * abstain from sex before marriage
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  I never subscribed to that belief. My parents’ sex talk with me was don’t have sex before marriage. I was 12. Even then I though, I’m going to do whatever the fuck I want to do.
- Mark987
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 did you follow their advice? I never got " the talk" and I was fairly young when I first had sex
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  @mark987 hell no. I had sex when I wanted to. When it was right for me. 5 years before marriage. My mom had the birth control talk with me when I got engaged. I had a really hard time not laughing. I love her but she is dense.
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  I wouldn’t even call it advice. Bossing me around about my own body. I didn’t take well to that.
- Mark987
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 hey at least you had the talk lol... I was in high school when i lost mine... and as a high school kid you just wanna lose it... even if you don't know what you're doing
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  I can’t disagree with that. I lost it a week after graduation. Lol
- Mark987
  +1 y
  @Ewgies01 if only our parents knew what we did lol
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  Mine would shit a brick and die. They can never know.
- loves2learn
  +1 y
  @still-alive you agree with the philosophies here? 🤔
- Still-alive
  +1 y
  @loves2learn yeah i pretty much can see what he's talking about here. i wish the stigma would go away everywhere
- loves2learn
  +1 y
  @still-alive yup. Sad. My parents tried to push it on me but I did not accept.

Most Helpful Girls

Brainsbeforebeauty Editor
+1 y
I think it depends on the two people involved and how fast or slow they bond, build that level of trust, so I for me I can't say an exact specific amount of time
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  You always give great answers :) THANK YOU
- Brainsbeforebeauty
  +1 y
  Thanks 🙂🤗
Ewgies01 Xper 5
+1 y
Depends on the person. If I were on the market again I wouldn’t rule out a first date. If I wasn’t feeling it then I would wait.
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  Yup depends on the chemistry right?
- Ewgies01
  +1 y
  Yup. Exactly.
- Still-alive
  +1 y
  @loves2learn this person is pretty sharp ;)
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- loves2learn
  +1 y
  @still-alive indeed she is.
- Still-alive
  +1 y
  @loves2learn i wonder what happened to her? left the site forever i guess :/

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What Girls & Guys Said

10 3

DizzyDesii Editor
+1 y
At least 6 months and must be in love and in a long term committmed relationship
0 1 0 0
loves2learn Master
+1 y
I used to be shy. I’m not anymore. So I wouldn’t hesitate to sleep with someone on a first date if the chemistry was right.
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- Jamie05rhs
  +1 y
  Wtf? You're married.
- loves2learn
  +1 y
  @jamie05rhs these are all hypotheticals.
- loves2learn
  +1 y
  If, knock on wood, my husband died or divorced me for some reason.
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- loves2learn
  +1 y
  Not to be morbid, but 2 of our 39 year old friends died this year. It happens.
- Jamie05rhs
  +1 y
  Noooo! Don't say that! 🥺 Think positive, girl!! 💪
- loves2learn
  +1 y
  I know. It’s been a tough year. Made me look at things differently. I am a realist. But I’m not cheating on my husband if that was how it sounded.
- Jamie05rhs
  +1 y
  Well, that's good!
- Jamie05rhs
  +1 y
  Sorry it's been a tough year. I hope things get better.
Dazed0N0Confused Yoda
+1 y
Depends on the chemistry.
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Ms_Vanderquack Guru
+1 y
Typically 3rd or 4th date.
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  For me being a guy.. majority of time it is on average about a month with someone I am seeing or dating so sounds about right... thanks for the answer
- Ms_Vanderquack
  +1 y
  It can take a month or two to get to the 3rd date.
- Mark987
  +1 y
  Yes I agree
Gwenhwyfar Master
+1 y
At least a month
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  Do you have a set amount of time or you just go with how you feel?
- Gwenhwyfar
  +1 y
  I just go with how I feel
Laciandmaci Xper 7
+1 y
until engaged or preferably married!
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Alexandrubaschet08 Guru
+1 y
1 week
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Josh4206 Xper 6
+1 y
Couple dates
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  Thanks for the reply
JessicaNeo Xper 4
+1 y
If I love that person I would definitely wait for him
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WinterBabe Xper 2
+1 y
Longer than 6 months get to know each other’s quirks and likes, dislikes their overall personality
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Anonymous
+1 y
My current boyfriend who I've been with for 3 years we had sex twice on our first date.
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- Mark987
  +1 y
  thanks for the answer... I am guessing you two had good chemistry?
- Opinion Owner
  +1 y
  Yeah, we still have very good chemistry
Anonymous
+1 y
i would say a few weeks
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Anonymous
+1 y
If I really like the guy I like to do it as soon as possible.
1 0 0 0