Sexual Relationships
+1 y

What do you think of guys, men, who committ suicide, because they didn't lose their virginity until late in life? their sex life started late?

just asking because, i know of a couple of guys, who committed suicide because they lost their virginity late in life, such late, near the end of their 20s, or sometime in their 30s or more, while they did eventually start having a sex life, the more times they had sex, the more it made them sad, depressed, because they didn't get laid earlier in life, such as their teens, or beginning of 20s.

I found these incidents, stories, heartbreaking, depressing, they end up being bitter and jealous, resentful of people who lost their virginity or started their sex life in high school, their teens, or beginning of their 20s.

At the same time, people will say to them: "

What exactly do you gain or accomplish by being angry, depressed, upset about what didn't happen in the past?" While yes they are right, but at the same time, they feel depressed about it and suicidal, because they feel they didn't grow up having a normal dating/sex life like most people do it seems, and upset because they feel everything is their responsibility because they are guys. They feel they missed out on the best years for sex.

Anyway, what do you think of guys who commit suicide over being a late bloomer to sex?
Updates:
+1 y
it reminds me, i like to believe, feel, think, that women are the only gender that have a right or are entitled, owed to sexual relationships, dates, but men are not
+1 y
i like to feel that prostitution, escorts, should be legalized in the U. S., and regulated a lot, that way the sex works don't have STD's or just very little, or i don't know how to say this, i kinda doubt it will ever happen, but the goverments or society of the world, they should place higher importance to make sure teens or people going through puberty, to learn and develop the imperative social-skills or social-behaviors so people know how to establish a romantic/sexual relationship.
+1 y
i know feeling this way won't help at all, but sometimes i hate women due to the fact that nature or evolution gave them the power to control the access to sex, or just the way that nature made it out to be, that men usually it seems end up celibate longer than women do it seems
+1 y
these guys, men, they are entitled and have a right if they want to take their own lives
+1 y
i know this will never change but it has always angered and enraged, pissed me off, that it seems that it always comes down to a mans social-skills or conversation ability, the way he talks, walks, sits, stands, certain social behaviors, among other things, that determines a mans ability to get a girlfriend or attract a woman, i never liked it but i know it will never change, it just fills me with anger and a lot of rage, i hate the way the world has to be
+1 y
i read this statement somewhere, it was depressing and enraging to read, don't get me wrong, i don't disagree with it, but it's just a reminder of stating the obvious: "The fact is you can't go back in time. There's essentially two options. Resign yourself to being alone and living a solitary life, or become open to the idea of having these "firsts" at a later than average age." it makes me think, i really hope that after we die, i hope that reincarnation is real
+1 y
me and tons of other guys, or people, would love to come back to life as a human being and start over, to make sure and work harder to make sure they grow up experiencing certain social milestones by a certain age, obviously guys will have to work harder than women do
+1 y
"they are still young and there's still sex to be had", i got mad hearing that, because those guys were still late to having sex later than normal, like 10 to 15 years late
+1 y
"They chose to kill themselves right in the moment their suffering was starting to END and right when what they finally wanted all this time, they finally got? Killing yourself because you fucked late, but still got laid, is pathetic. You don’t go for two weeks without eating, finally eat, and kill yourself right after. Eating is infinitely more important" those comments really angered and enraged me, pissed me off
+1 y
reminds me of a guy, who told me he is a virgin in his later 20s, he gets mad and enraged when he hears his neighbors having sex in his apartment next door, he says he feels like barging in on them and whacking them with a baseball bat, because the sex noises reminds him that he is not getting laid, and that men are dealt with the burden of seduction or work of making a sexual relationship happen or start
+1 y
man, sometimes it makes me feel this way, when i see a teenage couple and early 20s couple, it makes me feel like walking up to them and beating up the girls boyfriend right in front of her, would love to make him squeal like a puppy as i break his fuckin' neck
+1 y
"They chose to kill themselves right in the moment their suffering was starting to END and right when what they finally wanted all this time, they finally got? Killing yourself because you fucked late, but still got laid, is pathetic. You don’t go for two weeks without eating, finally eat, and kill yourself right after. Eating is infinitely more important" That made me very mad, because the suffering ended when they didn't want it to end, they wanted it to end much earlier, sadly nope it didn'
+1 y
because all the years of being celibate for so long, the mental and emotional scars are forever permanent
+1 y
its also another reminder how my mindset and mentality towards dating, relationships, has changed over the years, but i get annoyed, irritated, enraged, when people call it a skillset or something you learn, learned behavior, and when people use the word "practice", that enrages me even more, its long and difficult to explain, so what if there is still sex to be had? i don't think its the same as you reach or get to a certain age
0 0

Superb Opinion

  • I think sexuality is critical for mental and physical development. You can grow older, have a career or business, own a home, etc. But you're always missing that thing you feel like you were "supposed" to have -- and you certainly will lack experiential development in that area.

    So basically it boils down to: How do you have a formative experience when you're older? Seems tough, especially with hostility from women if you're in that position. They need formative experiences, like a high-school romance or sex after a party or something like that, anything even stereotypical will do as long as it happens at the time society says these things are supposed to happen. But how do you have an experience like a high-school romance when you're 30? It's exactly what they need, yet also seems impossible to have.

    Do they settle for single mothers, or spent party girls, or aging career women keen to get hitched? No matter how established they are in other aspects of life, I don't think you can just shove people into way of living others are expected to be at. So for example, a well establishment guy who has the unfortunate position of being a 40yo virgin who then has sex, cannot suddenly be treated as feeling like he's in the same place in life as a regular 40yo dude. We think of those position as having had experience with relationships and sexuality and probably being at a point where he's ready for a family -- if it hasn't already happened.

    Did the 40yo virgin suddenly become like that after sex? Somehow I doubt sex alone will shift a persons mentality to be like someone who lived with years of a set of sexual and romantic experiences -- and that's assuming the life without sex hasn't taken it's own toll of negative experience on the virgin.

    So again, how do you have those essential formative experiences by then? How do you unfuck that situation? I think you try to do something, but it's not what was needed and was disappointing. I think it's like growing up without a dad: People still grow up to be adults and sustain themselves and be productive, but it often leaves people fucked up after a decade or two in that messed up situation.

    To answer your question, what they got fell short of what they needed and it seemed impossible to find something satisfying and wholesome -- at least before they had sex the promise of it being satisfying and meaningful probably kept them going.

    They needed a formative relationship with an comparably inexperienced teen girl or early twenties girl looking for the same introduction to sexuality and romance. But that's nigh impossible to find when they're just going to look at you like your a freak and a creep -- and not because you did anything wrong, but because you did the same normal things as the guys their age did in conjunction with the crime of being older.

    I think it's perfectly possible that they could progress quickly to where they should be in life, through good experiences. But they have to start at the beginning and that's tough if you're an inexperienced older guy. Tough to find anyone, let alone the right person to have that formative journey with.

    • so yeah, sounds like for guys, men, who have a delayed start to their sex life or losing virginity, can have a negative mental, psychological impact on them, that can't be reversed

    • And the attitudes expressed by women in this question simultaneously show how deeply unpleasant being in those men's shoes can be as well as depicting why escaping it is so challenging.

    • yup, even if they do escape it, i don't know if they will ever remove all the emotional turmoil of all the years of celibacy that went by for them

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • Its getting worse all the time. Society keeps pushing sex and sex appeal as the new normal and tradition keeps pushing men into it lest they are not "real men". On the other side, society also demeans and demonizes men for wanting to have sexual urges and with women being more and more picky with the legal system behind them in full force, its almost impossible unless lawyers are present with contracts filled out beforehand. To say nothing of how men are supposed to know how to pick up girls just because they were tapped by nature at birth or something.
    I won't even go into male suicides caused from divorce or other post-relationship reasons.
    Its a mess. And its only going to get worse.

    • i'm sure this is no doubt one of the several contributing factors as to why the suicide rate is male-dominated

Most Helpful Girls

  • Seriously? I have never heard of committing suicide for something as frivolous as this. Although most people who commit suicide usually do so because of mental illness and I would definitely classify this as mental illness. I feel very strongly about people who commit suicide. I myself have had a very hard life BUT I have never considered ending it all. Most who commit suicide never really share why they did it. Last Summer two young men placed their burdens on the general public when they decided to commit suicide. Within two weeks of each other, they visited a local gun range and rented a gun kill themselves on the indoor range. Of course the local news stations picked up the story and it was all over. I am quite sure the second guy who was obviously down on his luck saw all of this news coverage and he decided this was the best way out. He too, rented a gun from yet the same gun range and ended his life. In my opinion it was a selfish act. They didn't think about the aftermath, who might have been an unwilling witness to these gruesome scenes, the first responders that had to bag their bodies, or the private business owner whose business got unwanted attention. Then there is the expense of having a crime scene cleaner come in. And last but not least, the family who was immediately thrust into debit over funeral arrangements. More often than not, suicides leave more questions than answers. I truly believe that not everyone can be saved and once one has determined that's what they want to do its hard to convince these people that suicide isn't the answer.

    • well the suicide rate has historically been male-dominated

    • I agree that more men commit suicide than women, but I agree with you about what precipitated this suicide. He sounds very unconnected and unhinged to end his life over this. While with a Sky Diving club, one of our members, a 19 year old girl, APPARENTLY was so upset with her breakup with a club member, she went up, and jumped, and went into the ground without ever attempting to deploy her parachute. Sad? Yes, ! People do deadly serious things for the strangest reasons.

  • It's sad, it's a big loss for their families and their friends. They put an end to their lives because of something that had a solution. For instance, there are people who were born with diseases, people who survived to car crashes but lost a part of their body, people who lost everyone they loved, people who lived in poverty their entire lives but still they want to live.
    I understand that guys are more pressured into losing their virginity than girls, but if they lose it in their 20's or even 30's is not the end of the world. Instead, they should enjoy their sex life to the fullest.

    • what do you mean it had a solution? ya but not having had sex when they were young, can psychologically mess up a person, they missed out on the best years

    • They could have sex later, that's what I meant by solution. Yes, it might be frustrating but I still think it's a not reason to commit suicide. There are people with bigger problems, people who are sick but they don't think about ending their lives. I'm NOT diminishing their suffering, but still I think there are worse things that could happen to them.

    • yes but people are the most sexually active in their 20s, i have been led to believe that the quality of sex declines with age, less stamina, lower sex drive, less powerful orgasms, etc.

    • Show All

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

If you had the power to snap your fingers and make something happen instantly what would it be?
Can men catch feelings after sex?
Do women really squirt or is that a euphemism for orgasming?
Are married men really happy seeing the same T&A and screwing the same woman every night?

What Girls & Guys Said

13 23

  • Really stupid reason to end one's life.
    There's people that can't EVER have sex or lose their ability to have sex and they don't commit suicide.
    So to say they did because even though they were having sex, they were still so depressed that they didn't years earlier? That's just ridiculous

    • who are these people that can't ever have sex?

    • specifically, who are these people who can't have sex?

    • who are these people who can't have sex?

    • Show All

  • Well they will enjoy sex even less then. But then they won't be able to commit suicide over it again. How have you held off so long at your age because you sound like you haven't been laid in awhile either.

    The closest some guys have come to seeing boobs.
    The closest some guys have come to seeing boobs.

    • why will they enjoy sex even less then?

    • its also obviously very easy for guys, men, to hold off on sex, because historically, it should be obvious, men have always done the heavy-lifting when it comes to starting a relationship

    • That is because pursuing women is their job. Women don't do the pursuing. At least not most of us.

    • Show All

  • That’s incredibly sad. My heart breaks for their families. Their mothers. Everyone has loved ones. If my boys felt this way one day and died by suicide I don’t think I would ever recover.


    In case anyone needs it:
    https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.



    Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It feels permanent now, but it’s not. Seek help. Life is worth living. ❤️

    • well those guys feel they missed out on the best years to have sex, to have a sex life, which they will never get back, since they can't change the past, they committ suicide

    • I know they feel that way now, but with age comes perspective. They are young and there’s still sex to be had.

    • ya, but they lost their virginity either near the end of their 20s, or sometime in their 30s or more

    • Show All

  • That they should have been in counselling, that their families should have offered support more than they did.

    that there is a toxic culture among men that certain things must happen in life or you are not a man.

    also potentially... a number may have had sexuality issues but live in a country, culture society where they could not be openly gay - that’s that toxic culture at work again.

    so all those that are anti gay men and live in that type of culture society, and are happy with anti gay things, those lives are sitting on your shoulders.

    lack of acceptance for a problem in your life is a key driver for suicide with a lot of people.

    • says someone who had a normal dating life, sex life in their teens and 20s

    • Yes but that does not over look what I said. If someone lives in a toxic culture say to sexuality where homosexuality is banned, scorned and people get kicked out of families. Then that society and those people need to shoulder the responsibility. Among teens, sexuality. Body shaming, etc are some of the biggest. Reasons for suicide, shoved under a large depression, self harm side of things. These guys that had it late in life, who supported them? Everyone carries emotional baggage through life, often when we get to say 30, some of our stuff we have had locked in a room, gets triggered and comes out. Often it’s the arrival of your own kids that triggers a bad memory that was locked away. Oh and for record mine was anything but that

    • well at least you still had a normal dating life and sex life like i described

    • Show All

  • It’s really sad, there is too much pressure around losing your virginity. It’s sad that people feel the need to take their own lives because of it. When really it means nothing.

    • ya but they missed out on having sex young, their youth, years they will never get back, thats why it hits those guys very hard mentally

  • Sad.

    • why?

    • It generally feels sad to see sad people. Especially ones who aren't gifted, whether physically or mentally. And it's sadder to see them succumb to a fate they always feard to have.

    • Feared*

    • Show All

  • Good riddance. Anyone so aggressively self-obsessed and pathetic to think the only thing in their life that matters is when and how often they have sex would be doing the world a favor by dying.

    • well there is no denying the fact that sex is a huge or major part of humans lives

    • Sure there is, plenty of people are perfectly content without it.

  • Evolution in action.

    • yup, i think its just a fact that far more men than women die virgins, or if they don't, lose their virginity late in life

  • A person doesn't commit suicide because their sex life started late. They commit suicide because of a spectrum of issues, including serious depression. Many people are virgins all their lives, are happy and fulfilled. It's not lack of sex that fuels a suicide.

    • yup, 99 percent male of people who end up like that

  • As a 25 yo virgin that's a petty reason to kill yourself.

  • They’re pathetic. They killed themselves because they got laid later than normal? They still got laid, what the fuck are they seriously complaining about?

    • ya well they missed out on their youth, missed out on the best years for sex, their sex life didn't start for them normally like it seems for most people

    • It’s pathetic to kill yourself over it.

    • why is that? sex is obviously one of the most important or biggest, major things about humans lives

    • Show All

  • So you finally getting sex why the hell still depressed about it? Better to show up then not show up at all.

    • @naughtybynature719 For real I can't wait till I have sex. Sucks that I didn't have it sooner but oh well but better late than never

    • because they feel they missed out on the best years for sex, since apparently, people have the highest libido, sex drive, or stamina, in their late teens or early to mid 20s, or just 20s, they feel they missed out on their prime years, and since they can't change the past and get laid when they were younger, they kill themselves

    • So time passed is time gone, so what npw? Guy is gonna sit and cry over the past? Npt gonna help anyone.

    • Show All

  • Everyone misses out on stuff when they young and cannot go back. I was 22 when I had sex for the first time. I guess I was a little on the old side but I had a girlfriend for 5 years that was a virgin and was saving herself for marriage. I never cheated on her even though I had a couple of chances to do it and there is no way she would have found out. It certainly was nothing I would commit suicide over. Even if I was 30 I would try to make up for it by keeping myself in good shape and having as much sex as I could for as long as I could.

    • Well stated.

    • well how long were you with that person you lost your virginity to?

    • Five minutes.

    • Show All

  • Sucks that happen but I would never kill myself over not get laid later in life.

  • Honestly... in one word... Pathetic. Sure it's sad that they kill themselves, but their motive... because they're a virgin... pathetic.

    • why is that a pathetic reason?

    • Some people struggle financially can't find food or shelter, are really sick, have their loved one taken away... and out of all heartbreaking and lifethreatening reasons... this one is because one can't get laid. That's a big waste to me. Dying over that sounds like such a waste

    • well sex is a major part of humans lives

    • Show All

  • In the present world men may get ridiculed for everything, from the size and shape of their penises to the age at which they decide to have sex. A 50 year old virgin man having sex for the first time with a much younger girl may be fodder for the cruelest of jokes at his expense and she may join in ridiculing him too. If he isn't good in bed, the girl may leave him and move on, perhaps to someone younger. It is a miracle, given present day society, that I have never heard of a man killing himself for that reason... yet.

  • They committed suicide when they finally started having sex? What? Source please.

    • just stores i heard from people, yes because they were depressed over starting to have sex late in life compared to most people, sad they didn't start having sex in their teens or early 20s

    • I still don't get it. You said they committed suicide after they started having sex. It makes no sense. Sorry, I'm not buying it.

    • because they were depressed, sad, upset, over having lost their virginity late in life, their sex life started late

    • Show All

  • I've heard a lot of reasons for suicide. But never this.
    It may be why they were late dating.
    Not the fact of being late starting.

    • well being a late starter is depressing

    • True. But is it through a bad up bringing. Putting you at a disadvantage to start with , making you a late starter.

    • what do you mean a bad upbringing?

    • Show All

  • I think its a damn lame excuse.
    Enjoy what you have now.
    Its not like they missed out they can enjoy sex now.
    Never to old to learn.

    • ya but people are the most sexually-active in their teens, especially 20s, more than any other decade in life, thats when the libido, sex drive, is at its best, peak, and stamina, thats what it seems

    • Its not a good enough excuse. I never had sex tell I was 27. I didn't let it destroy me.

    • how long were you with that person you lost your virginity to? as in, dating her

    • Show All

  • I never heard of that. It must be a new syndrome. I'd say they're probably excessively preoccupied by sex.

  • Show More (16)

Latest Questions

What’s your favorite part about going down on women?
Higher levels of dopamine and testosterone by 0.3% population? Is abnormal sex mania a good thing if there is self control and discipline?
I have been questioning my sexuality lately, Am I Bisexual?
Why would any man believe a real raped victim is damaged goods?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > What do you think of guys, men, who committ suicide, because they didn't lose their virginity until late in life? their sex life started late?