He almost raped me what would you do?

Question

my ex boyfriend was a fool. I met him when I was 16 and he was 25 at that time. Maybe the thought of an older guy interested in me excited me.. Then I had issues with my self confidence and he was really good at making me feel better. Then a month after we met February Valentine’s Day. He kept pressuring me to show him a part of me and so I sent myself in a bra. he kept pressuring me to show him my body and he would say things like “ I’m in the club with my friends and their all with their girls having fun in a room I can pick any girl here so why aren’t you showing me when I ask you” he kept this up until I agreeed we broke up a lot and I came back to him. he never texts me or frequently call me. He would text once a month (he wasn’t busy) and when he texts it’s too demand sexy time. I didn’t even know what we were. If I complained he would tell me I’m inconsiderate. One time I gave him money which he said he would return. He never returned it and on my birthday he kept telling me I was really stingy and not able to share with him. He has never ever given me a present NEVER. When I turned 18 he wanted to have sex with meOne day when we spoke he invited me over to his place and I knew it was bound to be sexual so I told him no sex which he agreed. Immediately I came he removed my top and he didn’t even say hi or how are you. He was all over my boobs and the removed my pants and gave me my first oral and I did the same for him. He proceeded to finger me with a finger and it hurt every single thing he did was not satisfying. I had to fake moan he was terrible. And I kept looking over and I saw he wanted to insert his dick in me. Omgggg he didn’t even wear protection this was going to be my first time and I didn’t consent. So I proceeded to beg him to stop the first time I held his dick and then he moved my hand away and he wanted to enter the second time, I was lucky that he stopped. I had to act like everything was okay to prevent him from being angry and raping me.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Im not suggesting in anyway that what he did was acceptable. But why did you keep proceeding forward with his demands? I think you went out of curiosity with the belief you might enjoy it and you learnt that you didn't enjoy it you felt used and hurt. You placed yourself in a vulnerable position alone with him.
You make us good guys look stupid and dumb, because we dont do any of this stuff and girls think we aren't interested at all, infact we get personally attacked for not being a sexual being when girls expect us to.
This guy will have had a 1000% success rate doing what he does.
You knew he was a creep, otherwise why was he only contacting you once a month? You werent contacting him on your own accord.
Ofcourse the argument is that you were groomed (i cannot deny this, guys and girls like this exist who just manipulate the naive so they can use them - this occurs in every day life no matter what age). Having said this, YOU control what you do. You went there, felt violated, stopped it before it got worse. You left i presume? You never went back. Learn from it, dont put yourself in a place alone with someone you do not trust and has demonstrated creepy behaviour.

deshsippingtea · Accepted Answer

Shit like this really is disappointing to hear, like dudes this days r hella weird, tbh obviously u wld be traumatised to date anyone right? Like its bad for him to do tht , he literally only wanted your body n he didn’t see the value in u n he just used you , i fucking hate dudes like this

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Gosh, texting you once a month that too for "sexy time" was such a red flag. Can't believe you missed it.
And I have a feeling that he's a pedophile, because no man in his right mind would ask a minor to send her intimate pictures.
He raped you. I think you should have reported this instead of just tolerating all of it. And seems like he was already sleeping with many.
Trust me, When I was about 19, a guy (27) like this fooled me, he even had a girlfriend and I didn't know. He on our first date, kissed me , touched my boob (I still feel like vomiting when I think about it) that is something that I'm trying to forget. And I was hella uncomfortable, I really felt horrible. And then he asked me to go to his room, I'm a university student and he even came to my dormitory thankfully, my best friend was with me at that time, and she was shocked to hear it and she told me straight "if you go to his room, he will rape you, that part I'm sure", so my best friend helped me to get rid of him by lying etc.
Finally, I came to know about his girlfriend, and I confronted him and he was very angry with me, then I never saw him.

Agape93 · Answer

I’d have killed him.

pizzapizzapizza · Answer

Piece of shit will get what's coming.

chukio · Answer

You should leave him but if you feel unsafe then just file a complaint. You should do both tho

RenegadeSailor · Answer

This was sexual assault. He committed a crime. Also hevsolicited a minor for pornographic material, thats a felony too. Go to the police.

Massageman · Answer

Report him to the police and move on.

EaterPeter · Answer

Get to safety then report.

Deku2009 · Answer

First of all no guy should ever pressure for pics , that’s making a relationship go way too fast (also that isn’t what a relationship is about) . Lastly taking off your clothes alone without content is rape. Him forcing your first time isn’t right either (definitely can put him in jail for longer if he put his dick inside of you ) . You need to get the police involved right alway.