There is an old saying, derived - believe it or not - from science. "For a woman, there is no sex until there is love. For a man, it is not love until there is sex."
Typically, and this is the law of averages - it is not always true - a woman must feel a sense of emotional connection before she will have sex with a man. By contrast, a man will also have sex simply for physical pleasure and relief. This having its origins in evolutionary biology.
For our prehistoric ancestors, the male was seeking to mate with as many females as possible. To spread his sperm and create offspring to perpetuate his DNA. For the man, so long as the female was fertile and could produce and care for healthy babies, she had served her biological and evolutionary function. (Her health being indicated to the man by the size of her breasts and other such physical characteristics.)
The woman, by contrast, could only carry one baby at a time. Further, once born, it required an enormous investment in time and energy to feed and care for the baby. So the woman was looking for a male with healthy sperm who would sire healthy offspring but who would then find food for mom and baby and ward off rival males and predators.
(Just to add, the woman played a little bit of a biological trick on the male. She wanted an aggressive male, but not so aggressive that he would be a threat to his own offspring or even just wander off to have sex with another female. So after she is impregnated - and gentlemen, this is still true - changes in her body chemistry, pheromones ad such, are detected by the male and reduce his testosterone level so that he becomes less aggressive and more protective.)
So the female is looking for reassurance, a feeling of safety and protection and thus she will not have sex if she does not feel intimacy and - in modern parlance - love. The male, by contrast, still has the basic instinct to impregnate the female. When a woman, for lack of a better term, gives her naked body to him, his brain interprets that as love. The physical act is read as emotion.
Of course, we have evolved past the point of our primitive ancestors, and it is far more complicated now. However, the essential biological imperative remains on both sides and still tends to impact how men and women view sex. Thus again, to a woman, she will not have sex until she feels love. For a man, he does not feel deep love until there is sex.
That is, as noted, the rule of thumb. Females still have an instinct to bear young and so - especially depending on where they are in their fertility cycle in the month and their age - women don't always wait to feel love. The instinctive evolutionary need to get pregnant will cause a woman to sometimes break the pattern. However, the overall rule still applies.
The reverse applying for the male. As he gets older and his sperm count declines, thus reducing the impact of his hormones on his behavior, he will seek sex more for love and reassurance and may be less inclined to random sex. The younger the man, though, the more his evolutionary need to place his healthy sperm in a woman makes him more likely to have random sex.
CONT.
Does that mean that women never want casual sex? No. In fact, truth in advertising, I fathered a child with a woman with whom I had a one night stand. (Now a healthy, happy 14 year old boy.) However, the statistical averages are that a woman will be less likely than not, but that is only the averages. Every individual woman will be different - some more, some less. You may be just be one of those women whose sex drive will take off when you meet that man who makes you feel warm and safe and protected and loved. For others, that simple biological urge to bear offspring will be the predominant subconscious at work. Of course, you might want to get a check-up just to make sure that there are not physical factors at play. That is NOT very likely, but it never hurts to be safe. Still, overall, you may be assured that you are not unusual. Maybe a bit to one end of the spectrum, but overall you are acting and feeling the way evolutionary biology made you. Sex is about how you feel and not what you feel.
Casual sex among women has been on the rise, but you sound asexual right now.
You might be asexual.
I for one don't do casual sex but I certainly get the urge - even when I'm single.
I get the urge to have sex and I masturbate a lot.
I don't usually have casual sex but I have done it a few times.
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3 years and don't touch yourself id be gone Crazy
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