How does one become good in bed without having a bunch of sexual partners?

How does one become good in bed without having a bunch of sexual partners?
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Superb Opinion

  • I think pornography can actually be helpful, IFFFFFFFFFFF you can separate fantasy from reality, and take it in with the proper grain of salt. Probably good to balance it out with porn naysayers opinions to do so. Like you can learn how to functionally perform the techniques and positions you might see, whose leg goes where, shit like that. All the “theatrical performance” stuff, I don’t know if I’d take my cues from that, or at least not until you’re comfortable with someone and ideally discuss things beforehand. If you read around the internet enough, it’s easy to find the women griping about the hardcore shit some dude tried to pull with them, haha.

    Or to a lesser degree, my girlfriend and I always laugh about the sex advice she’d see in Cosmopolitan magazine, when we were first dating we’d read those articles together and laugh and laugh and laugh. Goofy shit like “take a hair scrunchie and wrap it around his penis, and tickle his balls with an ostrich feather.”😂 Ladies, do NOT do that, that’s ridiculous, or again, at least have a discussion first. Honestly, not even being mean, I think I wouldn’t be able to control myself and would literally laugh a chick out of the bedroom if she did that😂😂😂 Maybe thats just not my jam, but I don’t think all those props are at all necessary. That’s where I’d say watch some porn and see how the pros do it, maybe minus the grand theatrics, unless she’s up to it. Basically take the techniques from it but leave the questionable etiquette and advanced stunts.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I lost my virginity at the age of 27 years old. The first time I had sex I made my female partner orgasm. I did not orgasm by the way.

    You actually don't need to be good at sex by having a lot of partners. Most of sex is emotional chemistry with another person. So it is more about emotional connection rather than skill. that is number one.

    Number 2... to answer your question. I was able to be good at sex as a virgin just by educating myself for like 15 years before having sex. So I was always researching the female orgasm, parts of the female body, reading stories about sex, reading karma sutra and other sexual technique, watching educational videos on youtube, reading the Feminine Mystique and other books. Another education was porn. Not the kinky hard core porn. I would watch soft core porn. The most educational porn to watch is actually Lesbian porn. Because via lesbian porn you get a sense of sensuality and erogenous zone that women have. sites like GAG are helpful as well.

    Lastly, girlfriends. For years my closest relationships were women. So they would tell me a bunch of their sex stories and everything.

    hopes this helps.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Don't rush things and take time to find out what your partner likes and what works well with them. It's really helpful to have a conversation and be open about what you bouth like and don't like. If she says she likes something your doing in the act don't go faster or change up things like a lot of men do just keep doing what your doing.

    Also really helpful to read up on sex and learn on the opposite sex body works and do lots of research and don't be afraid to try new things as long as you are comfortable with it.

  • Having a bunch of partners means nothing when it comes to the quality of the act. I can see how it could be helpful in reducing any fears related to the way we interact, but having more partners doesn't mean you automatically have skills
    As with any other thing you want to become good at, you need passion, understanding, quality practice and curiosity/desire to learn.

    • Well the more you drive a stick shift vehicle the better you can take those hills lol

    • I agree many partners doesn't automatically give you skills and quality. But if you are focused on being a good lover, having different lovers will give you more experience with the wide variety of preferences and kinks people have. Not everyone does it the same or wants the same things, so having just one single partner can limit your knowledge. Not bashing on having just one partner, and I completely agree with your final statement, which applies regardless of # of lovers.

    • the metaphor about a stick shift can be expanded to illustrate. Learning to drive a stick shift, various types of street bikes in different engine classes, stick vs. automatic, SUV, semis, formula one, stock race cars, or heavy equipment like a DC-10 or smaller stuff like a riding lawnmower or Bobcat. Dirtbikes, etc, etc. Not everyone is built the same, either (haha the DC-10 made me think of heavy people).

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Am old school male that needs to have love for sex to be productive. No love no orgasm. And at 44 still have more fingers that sex partners and am proud of it. Had relationship with a slut I dare say slightly skanky girl and surprisingly was best relationship I've had. Was because she was open-minded so communication was easy took no effort. I never had to lie or not tell her things. The sex was unbeatable! Again communicate is key. She had no problem telling me what worked for her at that moment. Clitoruses are so much like a puzzle. Need to crack the c9mbo before it shoots love clear out to sidewalk out front. Is like 50 fucking yards. Will need a gallon of fun to have a chance.

  • Practice, practice, practice.

    Sexual virtuosity is a skill like skateboarding, surfing, singing, guitar, violin or piano playing or dancing. You need to practice with a loving partner regularly.

    That's the only way to get better at it.

    • I want to chat you in private

    • @Shivraj12s About what? Something general:? Ask away.

    • Sorry I feel shy here But not forcing you

  • You can be the most technically gifted person in bed and still be terrible. You can know everything about the other sex's anatomy, know every place to touch, stroke, lick, and kiss and still be bad. You might get a few repeat performances, but being technically good isn't enough for the long run.

    If you want to be good you need to know how to engage the mind. Learn how to evoke passion and emotion in the other person. Being technically good isn't as good as being able to bring out the raw animalistic passion of the person you are with. If you can learn that, the rest will eventually take care of itself.

    People will remember the emotion they felt a lot longer than the physical feeling they had.

    • Nailed it!!

    • Thanks Justme143.

  • It can be true there are those who can manage innately.

    Others will have to communicate, lastly never think so much into it and enjoy.

  • Show & tell lol🔥🔥🔥

  • Easy it's quality not quantity... Only takes "one good sexual partner" and lots of sex... And being open-minded, adventurous and openly, honestly communicate also helps... More partners don't always mean more sex or better sex...

    • Being openminded I think is a very good point... since their really isn't any experience there. And having a few drinks before hand doesn't hurt either lol

    • You're wrong but I do agree with most of it. But having sex with different people... Some like certain things and some like other things. You cannot have sex with one person and then say you are good in bed. One girl may like to be pounded aimlessly and another doesn't and likes another way. Talking to the girl and figuring out what she likes is better. Awareness and caring. Over time you may have experienced many different type of women and what they like. Making you a pro in a sense but truly you can never really say you a good in bed unless you are referring to just 1 woman or the woman you already had.

    • @TrainingDay and I disagree with you... Every person is different and gets off on different things, fucking twenty females won't make you an expert on how to please the 21st, if she has different desires kinks, get to know the person you having sex with at that time, get to know them intimately inside and out, and that's when truly great sex happens, 🤷🏼‍♀️

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  • Easy, having a lot of partners DOES NOT make you good in bed. It simply makes you a little less self-conscious at best.

    I got better in bed from my long term relationships, if I know something is just for fun, why would I bother putting in the effort to strive for greatness to begin with? I don't care about them and they don't care about me.

    In actual relationships where I do care that they enjoy themselves, feel good around me, and I feel the same from them, that pushed/pushes me to be better, not just in bed but as a man.

  • Do research, watch porn, get to know your own body, go several rounds with that same one person until y'all find what works for you... its not that hard. But hoes look for excuses to hoe

  • Do as the majority of people do, keep playing with your partner and have fun together. Don't need a group of partners, just one, you love each other and no end to the fun you will have.

    • and may I add, talk about what you both like

  • Do research, ask around both genders/sexes, read the Kama Sutra, etc. I don't normally suggest this but you could practice on inanimate objects or sex dolls (they are getting really advanced and have AI now). Just research, observe, and practice, that's how it works with anything to be honest.

  • its not the number of sex partners, its the quality of sex partners, I think I became good in the sexual bed because of my first lover, he had the patience to teach me all the sexual pleasure points on me as well as to him now seeing as everyone is different you can't get it all right but over all its good

  • Research, communication, and get creative and have fun.

  • Lose the Ego and genuinely ASK for candid feedback from your partner.
    Explain YOUR pleasure is voyeuristically derived from witnessing HER unashamed GENUINE responses.
    Explain if she fakes HER participation that she's not only short-changing herself but YOU as well.

    If you CAN break through her societally-promulgated hesitancy & reserve; you BOTH will enjoy a very special intimacy and life experience that will make memories you'll cherish for a lifetime.
    I speak from firsthand experience! 'QUALITY' over mere 'quantity' ALWAYS! ---

  • By talking to the girl (or guy) and listening with not only both ears, but also how they tell you things.

    communication with your partner is really essential to finding out what works, what does not and what just happens in porn films.

    learning body language of your partner, learning how they do non verbal communication to certain things, all works towards improving BOTH your sex lives and also makes for a deeper relationship.

    cummunication helps with Fornication

  • Practice together often

  • Well for me. I think dildos helped a lot!

  • Study
    but overall it’s a bit tricky especially for women cause for those of us with fibromyalgia
    We are more comfy in missionary and as you know there isn’t much for us to do in that position ya know?

  • I think curiosity is the key. Its about exploration of the body of your partner. So why not to take some time to really get to know your partners body by touching, kissing, licking different parts and learn from their reactions just being curious and excited to touch and play with them a little bit. A guy who has 2 weeks experience just by being curious and patient and communicating with partner what she likes can be much better than a guy with year of epxerience who is used to go directly down there and destroy her within 5 minutes.

  • I don't think it's about number of partners. It's all about strong communication skills, and puttin in the reps.

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