Sexual Relationships
+1 y

I lost my virginity recently at my current age 22 years old but why do some people feel the need to judge you for not waiting till marriage?

I totally COMPLETELY respect people who have certain beliefs with marriage and sex after, loving that person at least before sleeping with them etc but i felt ready in my heart to have sex and it sorta was a random hook up but i dont have any regrets because he was cute and he made me feel comfortable the entire time. I notice girls losing their virginity at 13 years old or 15 so so young and i feel like as almost im being treated like a child when people say stuff because im a woman and it's my body and my individual choice. I dont get why society thinks they can come in sometimes and force people to do what they believe. I do believe in God and i am spiritual but i don't see what is so bad about sex. It's a fun, enjoyable act. I feel like the more people try to pressure or make others feel bad it makes you wanna do something more. My dad wanted me to wait for marriage but i honestly could not do that. I wanna make sure we have that romantic spark before i marry a guy and i believe marriage is a beautiful thing but look at all the failed marriages these days because people are doing it out of family pressure and society and they dont take enough time with relationships and getting a divorce is more expensive at the end. Once again i am NOT judging i just don't understand why people make it a huge deal if you chose not to wait😞
0 2

Superb Opinion

  • Hey Paolaa don't let people bother you, this is a question answer chat site no matter who it is including myself when you ask a question everybody is going to give you their answer for me I give you answer the to my heart in the most positive answer I can give you there are some other people that like to just spit out words and they don't care how they affect you see because is you take it seriously they don't they forgot the question 5 seconds after they has been or they forgot their answer 5 Second after they answered it so this is your the only one that counts if you are pinion it's your beliefs it's who you are nobody else's opinion I know when you read words they probably hurt you but don't let them there are people that say certain things just to affect you because they are happy in life they want everybody else to be unhappy look at you made a choice you like that choice you are happy and that's all that counts fuck everybody else like I said if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all but those are the people that mostly say something because they are miserable so relax okay don't take it so seriously if I was you I would have done the same exact thing that you did and I would be holding my head up high wanting to do it again

Most Helpful Guy

  • You dont want to get divorced so you had sex. Smh. You just invited divorce into a future marriage if you even do get married now. In a time when marriage is at an all time low and divorce at an all time high, you have statistically increased your chances to have it all go south on you. There are tons of men who will never ever marry you because you didn't wait. So hope none of them were you're true love. I've had to have that convo with girls before... i love you were perfect we want all the same things... but you didn't wait for me so im never going to give you a ring we can be together but no ring. And especially how you did it i find personally disgusting. You gave away your most precious gift to a rando. Sorry but i dont even have respect for you after that specific part. You 99% are going to experience the "fuck boy" phenomenon now. In which many men will date you for sex but not for marriage. I hope it works out for you but you really shot yourself in the foot if thats what you want out of life.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Some people still have outdated thoughts about being sexually active and all. Which there's nothing wrong with as long as you keep your values to yourself. I think sexual interactions is pretty important when you're dating someone, since I believe it brings you closer physically and emotionally, however it isn't like that for every person. I know that there are some people who wait until marriage and once they've had sex, it wasn't enjoyable and that kind of stuff can ruin a relationship. But like I said, it isn't the same for every person. If you feel comfortable with sexual relationships before marriage, that is totally normal and you shouldn't be or feel judged for it!

  • I have no idea why people feel they have to judge others just because they have a different viewpoint. I actually completely agree with you end recommend to everyone to enjoy and practice sex way before marriage.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

If women don’t enjoy penetration then why do they like sex?
What makes someone of opposite sex good in bed for you?
Is getting a circumcision the right answer in my case?
What is the safest way to dispose a used condom that was not your husband?

What Girls & Guys Said

7 26

  • ok... It's really messed up that you are being made to feel guilty for losing your virginity at 22.

    Your father is holding you to a standard that is unreasonable. All but the most extreme have softened their view on this to more align with what you said here.

    I really like what you explained and argued here. Except you were maybe a bit too understanding and non-judgemental... of judgement from judgmental people. It makes me angry.



    I can tell you that I judge people if they are trying to tell you that you don't have every right to lose your virginity whenever you feel is right. As you said. At 22 you aren't a child. Your father really has no business concerning himself with whether or not you have been penetrated.

  • I'll link the source, you'll find similar from multiple sources
    I'll link the source, you'll find similar from multiple sources

    You had a one time hook-up and are still focusing more on how he made you feel. Women tend to form bonds when they have sex. I've completely forgotten women I've had sex with, and they have gotten upset about that when approaching me again.

    How likely is it that you'll simply forget your first time, the feelings, or care?

    Men and women have different reproductive strategies. There aren't as many studies on the causality of men and their partners relating to divorce because we don't recall our partners as well. Casual sex is casual for us. Women do vividly recall their partners by and large.

    I don't care, because the chances of us meeting, or being partners is statistically insignificant. The chances of you getting a divorce has risen significantly though. It's a funny world.

    https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stability

  • People just like to be judgmental

  • Because they see you being happy about the choice you have made and it makes them feel insecure and probably a bit stupid about their own beliefs.

    In life, nobody cares about what you do, really.
    It's their egos that are crying.

  • Most people dont care

  • Religious matters. And one of the dumbest, to boot.

  • I think it's often influenced by their religious beliefs that they love to shove down people's throats.

    "God says XYZ" -

    No, your interpretation of religion or religion in general tells you to live your life a certain way and if you want to do that, go ahead, it doesn't make you a bad person, but stop acting as if everyone believes in your religion and as if the rules apply to all, including none-believers, so even if a person does believe in the same religion, to what extent they follow it is their own choice and not for you to decide.

    There's probably other reasons too, like societal factors, personal beliefs that don't involve religion, family tradition, etc, but religion is the first that comes to mind, I mean I understand and respect the fact that religion means sometimes to people, but don't be a dick about it.

  • People of all persuasions, tend to judge people by their own beliefs, and their own experiences.

  • Well because if u say your Christian you well know that pleasures off the body are a sin if done out off marriage its not somthing I believe in so for me its just a moral choice and I equally see it as fine as for why people push there beliefs on others thats just human nature

    • Realisticly tho you just need to understand we all judge people some just like to be vocal about it in which case ignore them

  • No girl should be “judged” — at least not for a history of having loved and bedded more than one man. That said, any person (of whatever sexual or gender affinity) should be accepted or avoided on the strength of their present integrity, thoughtfulness, tolerance, and capacity for meaningful participation in others’ lives. People who simply “screw around” without regard for consequences in sexually transmitted disease, and generalized drama in their own or others’ lives, tend to be emotionally insecure and manipulative. Those aren’t attractive traits of personality, quite apart from any issue of virginity or sexual availability.

  • You did the right thing. I lost mine way before you did.

  • Not judging but I am waiting until marriage for several reasons. As a Catholic pre-marital sex is a huge sin, but that is not the only reason why I am waiting, there are other reasons.

  • You are doing what feels right for you. Not everyone has the same views on sex. To me it is a big deal that should be shared with someone you love but lots of people see it as a hookup. That is up to them.

  • How do they know you lost your virginity?

    • I was writing about how i lost it with the pain and stuff asking general questions and i stated in some of my questions how i was a virgin before and some people who follow up are supportive, but some are like why tf did i do it and i feel kind of judged..:(

    • I think it depends on how you said it, I don't know the full context. But no matter what you do people are going to judge you, if you lose it before marriage you'll be judged, if you save it for marriage you'll still be judged, even more harshly (speaking from experience). I'm saving it till marriage because I'm of the belief that sex is sacred and should be honoured and practiced only in marriage, I'm a Christian so of course if someone is having sex outside of marriage as my duty as a christian I'll warn them, and tell them that what their doing is dangerous and if they continue living a promiscuous life they won't inherit the kingdom simply because fornication is out of God's will for them. But hey, if you choose that route cheers to you, but please be careful, you might enjoy it now but might regret it later. Sex is something pleasurable but intimate, if you eventually choose to be promiscuous leaving a piece of yourself with different people will cause you damage. So please be careful 🙏🏾❤

  • Some people just bold extreme views about certain things

  • Old fashioned people judge for religious reasons usually

  • Ignore them. They have no right to judge you

  • A small number of people in western countries wait. So while it used to be vh to maintain purity, that isn't necessary anymore. Funnily enough the wedding dress shouldn't be white if you aren't a virgin. The white dress, likewise, was a symbol of virginity and purity.

  • The choice is yours and none of anyone else’s business!

  • Hey Paola's don't let people get you down. People can be judgmental and insensitive.🐼

  • Show More (13)

Latest Questions

Sexually frustrated, am I in the wrong?
I caught my girlfriend reading erotica on her ipad -- should I be concerned?
How to stop feeling self conscious about my butt?
Girls- Do you like to swallow a guys cum or is it nasty?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > I lost my virginity recently at my current age 22 years old but why do some people feel the need to judge you for not waiting till marriage?