Do you share your sexual fantasy or secret with partner?

[oncpl]

If yes, does your partner like it and responses positively? Or otherwise?

[Sangita93]

I am from a traditional Indian Hindu family, and we follow most traditions about our marriage and social life. Word for sex – intercourse in our local language and Sanskrit is SAMBHOG, which mean pleasure equally enjoyed by both. If you both want to enjoy it equally, you should share your fantasies and secrets with each other. We both, my husband and I do share them. Everyone have sexual fantasies — and plenty of nonsexual fantasies, too. It makes sex more exciting. Most girls and guys fear - whether it is a good idea to disclose our fantasies. There is no right or wrong answers to this, but it depends on your trust and closeness with each other. One thing to consider about fantasies, though, is that they can run counter to other values we hold. We all have preferences about which fantasies will be easier to hear and which will make us more uncomfortable. Greater disclosure offers many benefits, but may also carry with it the price of not being happy about everything we hear. Because fantasies are completely mental, one can never fully know what is rattling around inside someone else’s head. It therefore comes down to trust. Basically, we need to take our partner’s word for it that they are not holding back on us. It is possible to keep a fantasy completely to yourself. If you are holding back on disclosing something to your partner, why is that? Fantasies drive relationship growth. Intimacy and disclosure can be challenging. It can be scary to share our deepest secrets, particularly around a sensitive topic of sex, for fear of our partner’s reaction. Speaking of fantasies, it can be tempting to view intimacy as a process of unconditionally supporting and validating each other. Perhaps this is easy and possible in the early days of a relationship. This is where the real work of relationships begins. Sensitive disclosures require the ability to be able to be OK with ourselves even if our partner gets weird, reacts badly, or gets judgmental about it. Having everything out on the table makes it more productive discussion of what to do about any disagreement and it is good for long-term happiness. If you and your partner can figure out the answers to these questions, then you will benefit from enjoying your own fantasies more, as well as enjoying each other’s fantasies. It probably is not always be easy, but that greater comfort with each other will benefit your relationship in other ways, too.

[oncpl]

Very comprehensive and logical. I must appreciate great understanding between both of you. I have read a lot about Indian society and know well psychological and social bases of trust and mistrust when sex discussions and sharing of fantasies come forward. I agree that Sambogh is an excellent and exciting relationship provided we understand. Unfortunately in subcontinent so-called ethical, moral and religious are too dominant to allow free expressions. At the same time I must appreciate openness in Hindu society comparing Muslims. I am from Pakistan, my elders hail from India and converted to Islam (I don't know exactly when and why). I share freely and frankly my fantasies with wife, discuss sex, and thankful to her for enlightening me about many psychological, emotional and sexual aspects hidden to me, or less known. This was possible only because of sharing with each other. I express my thanks and regards for your detailed response.

[Sangita93]

Thank You

[oncpl]

My pleasure.

[ChrisMaster69]

You sort of mention them, it greatly depends if the other person is vanilla or not.

trying to discuss kinks with someone whose vanilla can be awkward lol.

not vanilla, then they usually know not to kink share and that it’s just being open and that not everyone likes the same thing,

you definitely do not walk in and place kitten ears, a collar and furry tail attached to a butt plug on the table next to her 😂

[The_Maphio]

Of course I do, and she does as well. We tried a little bit of everything in our earlier times together and well... some fantasies are just that. When realized is most definitely not as hot or interesting.

[exitseven]

Not the ones I know she would not like.

[jahaims]

Duh.

[oncpl]

Unable to decipher.

[Pterodon]

Of course

[OnTheLevel]

I've learned over the years that being totally open about your kinks and things you want to try is the best way to go.

[oncpl]

I agree.

[CubaPirate]

Not all of them he he

[oncpl]

I can understand. Thanks.