Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Is sex without a condom a must? please look at the additional details?

I am a virgin in my early 20s and the reason for that is because I simply was not ready for sex before, but now I feel like I am.

Anyways I read on here that a lot of guys want sex without condoms in relationships and if I am completely honest I do not know if I am ready for that just yet.
I am not saying that I am against it, but I am saying that I would probably need a couple of months even to warm up to the idea.

Is this a turnoff? Is sex without condom a must?
Updates:
+1 y
When do you go from sex with a condom to sex without a condom (in a relationship)? A guy in the comments said after 6-8 months while another guy said after a year. What do you think?
0 1

Superb Opinion

  • Sex without a condom isn't a must, but it has definite downsides.

    First, it shows lack of, for lack of a better word, partnership. I mean, if a person is sleeping around, they're stupid not to use condoms to protect against STDs. But when two people are in a committed relationship, a condom signals lack of trust and commitment. It also signals sexual inhibition, as if a person is afraid of sex or doesn't care about the quality of the sex. It means that they don't know what good sex is like and don't want to learn how to fully revel in the experience.

    Second, condoms detract from the sexual experience. Neither of you can feel the sensation of skin sliding against skin. And the guy can't feel your juices on his shaft. I liken it to petting a soft, furry kitten while wearing surgical gloves. What would you feel?

    Would you only give a blow job if the guy was wearing a condom? So why is your vagina any different? Would your guy only go down on you if he used an oral dam? And what about kissing and swapping spit?

    I can't understand why a woman who is ready to grow up and indulge in the joy of sex wouldn't just get on the pill. There are many other forms of birth control, too, but the pill is simple, comfortable and non-invasive. It is at least as effective as condoms in preventing pregnancy.
    Every girlfriend I ever has was on the pill. It made it possible to engage in sex any time, any place without the awkward ritual of first putting on a stupid condom.

    If two people are in a relationship and decide that they want to engage in sex for the first time, it's not a bad idea to go down and get tested for STDs just to be 100% sure.
    It also helps to hopefully know your partner well enough to know their past and to trust that they aren't having sex with anyone else but you.

    In the end, though, real sex involves reveling in wonderful, sticky, slippery, male and female juices. I wouldn't be involved with anyone who didn't love that.

    • Just to be clear, I am not against it at all and I will use B. C. I probably just need a couple of months to truly warm up to the idea because right now I am not completely comfortable with idea of having sex without a condom and the risk of birth control failing

    • I totally understand. Your inclination to work up to it sounds healthy to me. :-)

Most Helpful Guy

  • A must? No. More desirable? Well, you can feel more, sure, but it's higher-risk. So let's break it down. There are two reasons to use condoms while having sex: to prevent the spread of disease, and to prevent pregnancy. If you both get tested beforehand (which you should; it's not a fun time, but it's better to know- and even if you're both virgins, you can get every STD out there another way, and some you can even be born with), that won't be an issue so long as you stick with each other, so you're safe on that front.

    But pregnancy's another matter. Sure, there are other methods of birth control, but given the life-disrupting realities of getting pregnant when you don't intend to, would you want to rely on only one defense? There's an obvious compromise, though- use condoms for vaginal sex, and go bareback for oral and digital. There MAY still be a risk with that if, say, you give him a handjob and then masturbate yourself (I've heard both "yes it can!" and "no it can't!" with equal vehemence; check with your doctor for actual facts), but if you're careful and creative, you should be okay.

    Ultimately, you have the right to set whatever limitations you want in your willingness to have sex- but remember that your prospective partners do, too. Discussion and reasoning with people usually gets better results than angry ultimatums.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Do NOT be pressured into having sex without a condom if you’re not comfortable/ready for it!!! Only have sex without a condom if both you and your partner have been tested for STIs and if you’re on some form of birth control — it’s not only about pregnancy it’s about being safe!

    I do have sex without a condom but only with my long term boyfriend because he says it feels better, and we both got tested.

    • After how many months did you and your partner decide to stop using a condom?

  • It depends on the guy.
    My boyfriend obviously likes having sex without a condom better but he's fine using them if that were to make me more comfortable.

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What Girls & Guys Said

8 36

  • Do not start having sex without condom! Sex without a condom is perfectly fine for a couple but that comes way, and I mean way down the line of the relationship, when you trust and are comfortable with your partner. If you are in a new relationship whom you don't fully trust and are comfortable with, then it is a 100% requirement. Everyone is different but for me, I say don't even think of having sex without a condom until you two have been having sex for at the very least, six to eight months.

    Even then make sure guy has a medical record stating he is clean of all STDs and STI's, and make sure you are on some birth control for at least three months before partaking in condomless sex. And do not let him badger you into accepting anything less, as it is your body and health and you have every right, I'd even go as far as to say an obligation, to see they are protected to the highest degree possible.

  • It isn't, and if any dude says it's a must, then they don't deserve access downstairs XD

    • UPDATE: the sex with no condom is basically when YOU are comfortable with it. But unless you want babies, get on another form of birth control, and I would always advise both to have std checks ( they're free here in the uk, but obviously may not be for you depending on where you live ) :)

  • It's your choice, but by going each way you would be better able to decide which you like best.

    If you go without, use reliable contraceptives & make absolutely sure your partner is clean!

  • as my mom once told me, condoms suck ass. they just ruin the good feelings. but without them, there is a lot of risks. trust the person, and use other forms of birth control if you aren't ready for a child.

  • it's really nice without but i understand your concerns

  • I always say condoms prevent minivans.

  • Do whatever makes you more comfortable, of you want a condom, use a condom, nothing wrong with you wanting to use a condom.

    • There is no set time that you have to go without a condom

  • It's not a must and definitely not a turn off. If the woman is not on birth control I would wear condom. You can make using the condom sexy, either rolling it on him, or watching him put it on.

    Going without condom is also very intimate. You need to trust him and be aware that if he doesn't wear condom he could ejaculate inside you. It's more pleasurable for the guy to have sex without condom but with condom is still very pleasurable.

  • Never without a condom, 1st sorry if any my word's hurt you, dear now day's in this modern world everyone have a nature of use and throw, I don't mean your boyfriend is not loyal or honest but no one knows what happen in future, so never try sex without condom or some boys seduce girl's that don't worry I pull out my penis when my sperm ejaculation occurs and mostly not control and done inside vagina and if some control sperm ejaculation then precum mean little amount of sperm enter inside the vagina may be chances of pregnancy occurs, so dear please don't try sex without condom..

  • Any decent guy will let you decide, and I don't mean after he badgers you that he will not wear one. If you are not ready for going without a condom, then don't do it. It is YOUR body.
    Most 'mature' guys will abide by the ladies request and wear one if they want to do the nasty.
    Most macho a-holes will say they will never wear one... stay away from those guys.

  • No it is not a turn off for me to use a condom. If that is what you prefer for me to have sex with you I will! Also if you are not on the pill I will use a condom!

  • Definitely not a must.
    Any man that you have sex with should be willing to respect your wishes when it comes to safety and comfort.
    Sure, it feels a hell of a lot better without, and men will use any excuse, but we're pigs that way ;)
    Keep yourself safe and comfortable with what you are doing.

  • Do what you are comfortable with.

  • No it's not a must and a man who refuses to use one is not worthy of your time.

  • It’s never a must, it’s a privilege

  • No, it is not. Just be sure you get the plate number off his car or his license number and let him know you will pursue maternal care and 18 years of child support.

  • He needs to wear a condom. If he cannot except that. It is his loss.

  • Right now stick with condoms. He will yield to you to get the vag

  • No it really feels the same for us just not for guys. If you ever want to not use a condom make sure that that person takes an std test first and make sure to be on the pill at least 21 days that’s what I did with my boyfriend

  • not at all compulsory...

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