I’ve never had an orgasm during sex (without sex toys). Any advice?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend of 9 months hasn’t made me orgasm from sex. We’ve tried a few different things and positions, but the only thing that works is using vibrators. I love him to death and I know he feels bad that he can’t make me orgasm, but I refuse to lose hope. He will make me orgasm eventually, we just need some more advice. Yes he’s tried eating me out. Yes he’s tried finger me. The thing is, I don’t know what to think about during sex. I mostly think about what it will take for me to cum, and when I will do it—but that doesn’t end up happening because I can’t cum! I feel like there is something wrong with me. We’ve had sex over 100 times. We’ve tried different positions and stimulation techniques and I get VERY close but then it doesn’t happen and it’s a major fucking let down. I feel like my boyfriend is slowly losing hope because he doesn’t finger me or eat me out as often. Do I need to go to sex therapy? I just want to be able to be normal and have a completed sex life without having to worry if I’m like fucked in the head or something. So any advice? Or can you relate? Thanks

[summiter]

I'm sorry to hear you are having difficulty ... a lot of people have trouble with orgasms especially women. I'm happy to hear that a vibrator can get you off!!! Maybe try a few things:
1) I think your boyfriend may be trying too hard. Fingering usually does not do the trick for a lot of girls.. it feels ok but it may not get you to orgasm.

2) I would use the vibe or have him use it (showhim exactly how you like it) to get you very very close to an orgasm. Do this several times (edging) and then try some slow sex.

3) Don't try so hard to have an orgasm! Just slow down and enjoy the good feelings, and one may sneak up on you.

4) Don't rush sex and do not just let him start jackhammering away. There is a difference between fucking and making love. Try the slow approach and make love.

Can you get an orgasm by masturbating without a vibrator? If so show/teach your boyfriend how you do it.

Your thoughts?

[Browneye57]

If you know what makes you cum, then SHOW HIM.
And if you can ONLY cum with a vibrator, then let him do you with it.

Most women cannot orgasm from penetration alone - there needs to be direct clitoral stimulation. Either by you OR him.

I've never heard of a woman that doesn't cum from the 'come-hither'. Simultaneous licking of the clit, while doing the come-here motion with a finger on the g-spot. Nearly instant orgasm. And then they're soaking wet and ready for a pounding. LOL They'll usually cum again then.

Anal sex can also produce giant-O's, but takes some practice. It's surely not for everybody.

[PrettyPriya]

Ok, maybe I can help. Can you give me a bit of clarity about if you’ve tried to do it on your own and your technique? I know, personal question but will help me give better advice.

[PrettyPriya]

I realize I was away a bit and asker may not be on, so here it goes: Finger penetration doesn’t do much for me. Feels good, yes, but never gets me all the way there. Also, if the guy misses a beat towards the end it can ruin it. So, get yourself some privacy and relax. Prop a couple pillows up so you aren’t lying and not sitting. Spread legs and get really comfortable. I use index and middle finger to really slowly and gently brush against my labia. Almost like a tickle. This starts to build arousal. Once wet, use your fingers to spread your labia. Use your fingers to get all areas sufficiently wet using your own natural lubrication. This is at the point where girls differ but I use the two fingers mentioned held together to slowly start stimulating my clit. I go very light and slow, almost teasing like. You will start to feel that flush feeling. That’s when I begin increasing pressure and speed a bit. When I’m close, I got much faster and harder. The absolute key for me is direction. Not up/down but across almost at a 45 degree angle. Everyone is a bit different but that never fails me. Make sure to have privacy and time so you don’t feel rushed. Please feel free to ask more questions. Thank you to @wise4myage for tagging me.

[Rudon00]

PrettyPriya MHO here. Couldnt have done anymore justice to it.

[Rudon00]

PrettyPriya may I ask you something. I see that you live in India. Is India still taboo around the issue of sex toys and masturbation?

[PrettyPriya]

@Rudon00 Thank you for your kind words. It is hard to say if you are comparing to other cultures. What I can say is that times have changed and many things that used to be considered sexually taboo or really not. Probably still isn’t nearly as open as Europe but not as bad as what it used to be.

[Rudon00]

Okay I see. and yes I was comparing cultures.

[PrettyPriya]

@Asker Should mention this can be applied to oral and during sex. You can use whatever technique works while you are on top. Can also pass along what feels good to the boyfriend for oral. I was simply giving advice on stimulation without toys. ❤️

[Wise4myage]

You're welcome Priya. :)

[Jamie05rhs]

Wow- I always thought India was the least taboo. Don't they have the best sex teachers? Didn't they pretty much invent sex?

[PrettyPriya]

@Jamie05rhs You are thinking Kama sutra. We didn’t invent sex lol. Sex existed since the dawn of time. No sex positions, that dates back a long way here.

[Jamie05rhs]

@PrettyPriya I know. Lol. Just saying, through. If you didn't invent it, you perfected it. Plus, every girl from India that I ever talk to seems to have a much better understanding of sex than anyone else. So you should be proud! :)

[PrettyPriya]

@Jamie05rhs I would say I’m proud. Sure, proud. I guess I know what I’m doing for the most part. 👍

[Jamie05rhs]

@PrettyPriya I mean of your heritage. Lol. But yeah, I'm pretty sure you're very skilled individually as well. ;)

[PrettyPriya]

@Jamie05rhs I think it goes without saying that most people are proud of their cultural heritage. Most, not all.

[Jamie05rhs]

Yes; everyone except American Democrats. Lol

[PrettyPriya]

@Jamie05rhs Not too familiar with your politics over there, so left to take your word. 🤷‍♀️

[Jamie05rhs]

Haha; okay. No problem.

[PrettyPriya]

Thank you for mhg ❤️

[Rudon00]

Hey PrettyPriya. Good morning. just checking up on you. Haven't heard or see you around this morning. Hope you are keeping well.

[stevie123]

It can be frustrating, but some girls just can't cum easily. Keep trying different things. Maybe a cock ring to stimulate you or even better, a vibrating ring that will make you both hot.. Clear your mind during sex.
Hope it works out for you..

[FunkyMonkee]

Teach him what you want done or get someone that knows what they're doing.

[Sam_The_Savage]

It's all depends on guy how he take you to the heaven of sex.

Sex is art and not everyone is Great artist.

[es20490446e]

Slower and longer, enjoy more the preliminaries.

[genericname85]

Have you tried not using a toy in sex or Masturbation for like 3-4 weeks. Could be that you conditioned yourself to only cum with toys.

[Bobme]

You need to guide his fingers to your clit. I assume it must be tiny. That's alright size doesn't matter. Teach him how to tease it. Circle it with his finger flick it with his tongue. Slide his other hand up to grasp a breast and stroke it and tease the nipple. Slide the hand slowly on your body as he sucks on your clit and flicks his tongue pressing firmly as he rubs just about the clit and sliding a finger or to into your wet warm kitty. Pushing hard with his tongue against your clit then licking all the labia and juices. Then sucking hard and grasping a breast you will squirt and orgasum like never before. Now that the foreplay is over. Short pause, then start again. You will orgasum even quicker the second and third time in a row. And I'm sure you will jump on his lucky rod and give him some glory.
I am available to teach you how to have multiple orgasums and squirt like a firetruck.
Lol

[Jamie05rhs]

Relax. Just use the vibrators!

Are you having fun? Do you love each other? Then who cares? What's the problem? Are you afraid you're going to run out of batteries?

[Wise4myage]

Nothing is wrong with you, and when you get really close then don't stop. Also, try to relax more and stop thinking about not being able to have an orgasm because that can screw with your head. No pun intended, lol.

[Twalli]

I think because you are thinking about cumming it's becoming harder. Because sex feels good just loose yourself in the feeling.

[Yourman84]

Sounds like you just need to relax more. Maybe less focus on the outcome and more about what is happening.

[MasterKS]

get a better man.

[Asker]

Nah :)

[lycanthrope3]

I had one wonderful girlfriend that could only cum if one of us was rubbing her clit,

[Anonymous]

I think more for play and dirty talk, really get kinky and grind each others gears than fuck like animals

[Anonymous]

It might be worthwhile looking into tantra practitioners, essentially teachers and sex coaches.

[Anonymous]

Have you been able to have an orgasm from sex with other guys? If not, I suggest speaking with your doctor. Some women I have been with have had a similar issue but were able to have an orgasm if they fingered themself during intercourse or oral.

[Anonymous]

Literally nature telling you that you're in an unnatural relationship with a beta male and you aren't listening. This is why "Life is suffering". Stupid women.