How to ask my husband to be more aggressive in bed?

Question

I’ve actually asked him 1-2 times he said okay but nothing changed. It’s just very spontaneous.

Sangita93 · Accepted Answer

Do not ask, just take action. There are some traditionally known aphrodisiac foods that boost libido -arouses sexual instinct, brings on desire, or increases sexual pleasure or performance. Try them without telling him for few days, result will be surprising. For example - Maca a sweet root vegetable, related to broccoli. Tribulus terrestris, also is an annual plant that raise testosterone levels and boosts sexual function. Ginkgo biloba is an herbal supplement and traditional Chinese medicine uses it to treat many ailments, including depression and poor sexual function. Ginseng is a popular herb in Chinese medicine, particular type — red ginseng — is commonly used to treat a variety of ailments in men and women, including low libido and sexual function. Fenugreek seeds are most commonly used in Indian dishes, but it is also popular in Ayurvedic medicine as an anti-inflammatory and libido-boosting treatment. People have been eating pistachio nuts since 6,000 B. C. to lower blood pressure, manage weight, and reduce the risk of heart disease. Males who consume pistachio nuts regularly experience increased blood flow to the penis and firmer erections. Saffron is also popular for its potential aphrodisiac properties, men who took 30 mg of saffron per day for 4 weeks experience higher levels of arousal and increased lubrication. Some other popular examples are: Chocolate: Chasteberry: Honey: Epimedium: (also known as horny goat weed) and Hot chilies: I never advocate for Alcohole.

“More aggressive” can be part of domination and submission play. That can be fun. If you want him to be more aggressive, you need to be submissive. Any sort of discussion feels awkward in the first place here. But there is a time and a place for everything, and in the bedroom, with your husband, you can have those talks. Use whatever words come to mind. Something like “I know you are a strong man and I want you to show that it in the bed” is a great start. Is there a scene in a movie or TV show you find exciting? Show him the scene; (it is very likely to be on YouTube.) Is it something in porn? Show him that. Yes, saying and showing may be embarrassing first time, but he is your husband, he loves you, he should be fine with you saying and sharing these things. Men are visual creatures.

Taking bath together is almost compulsory for us on every Sunday. Guys just love making out in the shower. Kissing under a shower is a sure fire way of getting the sexual action kick started. Work up lather and sensuously wash each others' bodies. It will leave you feeling fresh for the real action. Men love a bit of naughty teasing dirty talk. Whisper sweet something into his ear describing all the things you would like to do to him, or have him do to you. Erotic dancing is great tool of seduction. Foreplay and sex does not need to be restricted to the bedroom.

Caramelpie · Accepted Answer

Act crazy on bed and drive him crazy. Go down on him! Rip off his clothes, kiss him aggressively! Kiss him here and bite him there. Tease him a lot during a foreplay and never let him have you unless he is fully turned on and can’t fight the urge. Some girls don’t know what to do on bed then complain how their boyfriends gets bored or never get wild on bed. You are a girl so use your feminine features to turn him on.

PenkWing · Accepted Answer

Find a moment to talk and be completely clear and explicit about what you want. Spontaneous doesn’t cut it when people are educated to think that “certain things” are not ok. You need to be deliberate, and maybe when he finds his own way, with time, it will feel spontaneous. It’s a learning thing for both of you: learning how to interact with the other, and learning how you feel in a certain role.

In the end, it’s possible that he will find out that a more aggressive role is not good for him. Be prepared for that outcome, but leave him time to experiment and learn. If he just doesn’t feel like it, you will need to think of different solutions.

Jjcatt · Accepted Answer

I hate to say this but some men just aren’t aggressive during sex, I can’t understand why, when I get in bed I’m absolutely turn on by my lady,, mayb try a lot of foreplay, I wish you luck because the best part of a relationship is in the bedroom, by the way this could just be me but I’m so turn on by the cologne my fiancé put on her body, it cost over $200 but it’s worth it, mayb he could be turned on by a sexy smell too

DonkeyDan · Answer

Have you tried pissing him off before sex? My ex wife used to deliberately wind me up and piss me off before initiating sex because she knew if I was still annoyed with her I'd fuck her really rough and be more aggressive.

slatyb · Answer

Have you been specific about what you would like? For example, would you like him to just fuck you whenever he takes a notion, without asking or foreplay? Then tell him that. Maybe you have already?

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Maybe you need to tell him in the heat of the moment?

Alexandrubaschet08 · Answer

cuckolding is alwase a solution, he can watch and learn and you can try for that moment even something new.

VikingWarLord · Answer

You're too kinky for his ass, you need to open the relationship up because you're eventually gonna cheat on him with a hot, dominant, sadistic bastard like me who will push ALL your fuuckin boundaries!

Cnlngler · Answer

Maybe his is just not used to that, maybe he feels its wrong because he loves you and doesn't want to hurt you.
I would sudjest buying a whip or handcufs something to ease him into taking more control over you.

Watch a porn movie that shows how you would like to be handled and tell him that it turns you on, Reward him with something he likes you to do.

Wise4myage · Answer

Be more aggressive with him?

kellytheman · Answer

Tell him what you want him to do to be more aggressive. Tell to pull your hair pin me down slap my ass stuff like that and usally he will listen. Maybe get aggressive with him and he might return the favor.

Twalli · Answer

When you're having sex ask him to be rougher or go harder. If you do doggy ask him to slap your ass. In the moment he may do it.

Cowboy6666 · Answer

Use curse words when he is about to start or when you ride him :P

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

Ask? Do it! Be more aggressive yourself!

OnTheLevel · Answer

Don't just tell him to be rougher, give him specifics. Tell him exactly what you want in the moment.

YalancıBahar · Answer

Maybe you can wear different things in bed? Has he any fetish?

Seppel · Answer

I am not into being aggressive during Sex.
If my girlfriend would ask me to be more aggressive I would Break Up because I would never be able to give her what she wants.
I would never be aggressive while sex

jimmy2 · Answer

Well teach him. This is the way i want then dobit to him

MasterKS · Answer

be open he is your husband not others.

Sampan2017 · Answer

You make him aggressive

FixatedPixelation · Answer

Watch porn together of what you are into and tell him ahead of time it turns you on. Then he‘ll know your limits.

Anonymous · Answer

Set and example or show him some porn that features what you'd like him to do. Reward him however he wants if he complies with your wishes.

Anonymous · Answer

Be more specific. How do you want him to be "aggressive" with you in bed?

How to ask my husband to be more aggressive in bed?

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