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Confused about my feelings for a former tinder fuckbuddy? Am I actually in love with him? Are they actual feelings? or do I just like his attention?

nocturnalbaby
So I matched with a guy on tinder early last year (almost 2 years ago now), & he lives in another state, so I matched with him on tinder when I was visiting his state over the weekend.

I only saw him about 5 times last year, because the state he lives in is 3 hours away from me by car, and he didn't have much of a reason to come here, but when he did, he came for something business related, & it was during those visits that we met up to have sex.

The sex was good & pretty kinky & adventurous, I tried a lot of new things for the first time with him, but it was always really quick & rushed, & he always asked me to leave the room straight after & used the excuse that his cousin or boss who came with him was staying in the room next door & was about to come in to discuss something with him.

So we never got to spend any time together, & we also didn't chat outside of our meet ups except for an occasional 'hey' and 'what are you up to', which isn't even a conversation. He even treated me kinda badly, constantly annoying me about whether I had any friends I could bring when I went to see him so we could have a threesome.

We stopped talking about 3 months ago, when he deleted me on snapchat after we had an argument about him cancelling our plan to meet up, in his city.

So I'm just wandering, how did I even fall in love with him or get any sort of feelings for him after only 5 rushed sex sessions, no conversations & no time spent together? are these even feelings? or is it something else? like an obsession or pleasure from feeling desired by him or something?

or could it just be physical attraction? I don't think it is though, because recently I found out he has a girlfriend & that she was possibly his girlfriend all of last year, even when I met up with him, & I started crying cause I felt so hurt. So it's probably not just physical attraction.
Confused about my feelings for a former tinder fuckbuddy? Am I actually in love with him? Are they actual feelings? or do I just like his attention?
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