Are you a bottom (submissive) or top (dominate) when making love with your lover?

[Samantha-harris]

[MrOracle]

You're actually confusing the terms (a common mistake), so I'm going to clarify.

Dominant: Takes charge, makes the decisions.

Submissive: Allows someone else to be in charge and make the decisions.

Top: The "giver" of a sex or a BDSM act. If tying up is involved, this is the person tying. If a paddle is involved, this is the person swinging it. If fucking is involved, this is the person penetrating.

Bottom: The "receiver" of a sex or BDSM act. This is the person being tied up, paddled, or being penetrated.

While it is the exception to the rule, it's still very possible to be a Dominant Bottom or a Submissive Top, so Dominant should not really be equated to Top, or Submissive to Bottom, as if they always go together - even though we know that it's the most common arrangement.

[DJB72]

I'd disagree about penetration. A guy can be a submissive bottom by the woman simply choosing to put him inside her for her own pleasure, essentially using him as a human dildo. A sub/dom relationship based on tease and denial for example

[MrOracle]

@DJB72 I suppose that's an argument that can be made, but but that's an even tinier niche.

[Bobsyoruncle]

I’m 68, with a dicey ticker, bad arthritis, two game legs and sketchy erections.

Only one position/approach still works consistently for me...

I lay on my side, behind my wife who has her back to me. She bends over at the waist as far as she can and pulls up the ass cheek thst’s on top so that I can mount her and I go to town.

It doesn’t take long.

If it’s a fizzle, it’s ‘no harm, no foul’.

If I’m able to ejaculate I owe her ten dollars, payable in cash just as soon as I pull my penis out of her.

She has a nice, loose vagina that gets wet quick and she doesn’t mind that I seldom need more than a dozen or so thrusts to get off.

She gets much better sex from her ‘friends with benefits’. And I can have a far more satisfying ejaculation by jacking myself off as I sit by the bed and watch them copulate, so don’t feel too sorry for either of us.

[Lliam]

Top or bottom, I am dominant either way. I love gripping a woman and fucking her hard. It's great to move her around, position her legs, and even lift her, bounce her up and down or back and forth, grasp her hair or wrists, and swat her ass.

But I also like to have her ride me and use my cock to pleasure herself. In that position, it's great to watch her, but also to have her lean down and dangle her tits so that I can play with them and suck her nipples. And even in that position, I can grip her hips and jack hammer her from beneath.

No matter what position, my goal is to make her cum.

[ChrisMaster69]

Real world stuff 24/7 365 and Dom.

[summiter]

Both can be fun with a hot girl

[DonkeyDan]

I thought they were terms used in the gay and bi community?

[Jakekk7634]

its for straight bi and gay!

[MotorcycleMan]

Neither. One of us does not have power or dominance over the other. It's a mutually shared power of love.

[exitseven]

We were doing a lot of cowgirl and reverse cowgirl lately so I will go with that.

[elizamichale1]

I do both but i m not a dom though

[rcljr]

Whatever, just as long as she stays away from the butt.

[Massageman]

Definitely!

[es20490446e]

I'm everything good.

[FinalFantasyBro]

I always prefer the dominate role

[Jakekk7634]

im verse but i MUCH perfer being bottom, Im a bratty bottom.

[Iron_Man]

Top dominant

[NorthwestRider]

I am the sub mostly

[Jamie05rhs]

Please learn to spell before you start having sex.

[okeydoke]

The word you’re looking for is “dominant”. “Dominate” is a verb and not appropriate for this context.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Top. Submmisiness isn't in my nature unless its towards Jesus Christ only.

[FireFox001]

I like to be on the top, but it's not about domination. I like a lot of other poses as well.

[HimaniS]

Submissive

[NightOwl8801]

Top for sure