Is it okay to break up with a guy just because he's not good at sex?

Question

How can I politely break up with a guy who is not good at sex?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Do you like the guy otherwise? Do you see a future with him outside sex? If so. I think it's rather short sighted to simply breakup for this.

I'd suggest at least trying to train him first. If it's just being clumsy or not having a good rhythm. You can teach him to do what you like.

Be more verbal in bed. Give him cues like faster or harder. Grab his hands and guide them with yours to where you want to be touched and how to touch you. Say stuff like that's it, gentler, a little lower. Push him off you to change to a position you want.

Basically, be the coach.

Because it'll be way easier to train him to be better in the bedroom. Than to find someone who's an emotional match for a relationship.

Slingblade1126 · Accepted Answer

I broke up with a girl because she didn't satisfy me in bed. She was very timid, NOT uptight but timid. Didn't want to explore anything sexual. It was always me on top or her on top. I thought as she grew closer to me it would change but it never did. I talked to her about it but that is ultimately what lead to the breakup. Once you talk about feelings are hurt and sex becomes awkward. You don't want them to do things they despise just toake you happy. Sex is one of the most important things in a relationship. If you're or your partner aren't satisfied odds are it won't change.

snowgirl123 · Accepted Answer

well if you don't like him it is okay to break up with him as long as you are kind when telling him so. I think that if the problem is sex, why not learn together? there are so many other problems that can destroy a relationship. the most important is that the both of you take care of each other and love one another

Little_Bumblebee · Accepted Answer

I think it would be a good idea to think about why he's bad at sex. And whether or not he improves.  If that is your only reason to break-up. But no one should feel forced to be with anyone.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Depends how long you've known him. Different lengths of time warrant different sensitivity and respect/details.

nayans · Answer

I wonder why you should date a guy in the first place if all you care is about sex?

Daniela1982 · Answer

Weren't you bad at sex at one time? After all a girl has to just lie there and be good while a guy has to work at it a bit. So give him some slack.

SnakeBoop · Answer

Have you actually tried to help make the sex better first? if not, then just say you lack sexual compatibility and its important to you and be on your way

TangBang69 · Answer

This is why sex should not wait until a relationship and feelings are developed to then discover this. Sex is a large part of a relationship and physical attraction largely what starts one, of course it needs to be good. One does not commit to buying a car without wanting to test drive it first, why commit to a person you're going to be riding without doing the same?
The longer it waits, the more awkward the situation is when finding out the two are not compatible in it.

ushagomez · Answer

I guess U have tried to train him? If that has not worked then let him know he is not making a he grade as long term partner material so you won’t mind if he goes off with someone else.

slatyb · Answer

If he calls just say "I'm sorry, it's not working for me. I wish you the best." If you have done of his stuff arrange to give it back.

SarahP080102 · Answer

Just be honest

buddysboy16 · Answer

Why don't you just teach him what you like? Sex is all about communicating

imjustadude · Answer

Yes, but let him know where he is going wrong and give him another chance if you think he is worth it.

exitseven · Answer

Maybe you can practice with him and he will get better. You will feel pretty bad if you dump him and one of your friends starts going out with him and you have t hear how awesome he is in bed,

ShySara · Answer

Why don't you tell him what you like instead?

Manchild2018 · Answer

Well how do you know he doesn't think you aren't good at it? lol

genericname85 · Answer

sex is a team sport. gotta train with your partner till it works out xD but of course there can be big differences in personal preferences or physical missmatches that just won't ever be fixable.