Sexual Relationships
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I couldn't cum from Vaginal or Oral sex? tried 3 times so far?

I have anxiety and I am on Anti-depressants and other medication for almost 6 years and never had sex before but I wanted to try and I met 3 h00kers on 3 different occasions and had oral and vaginal sex (with condom), I can stay hard but couldn't feel a thing. and they couldn't get me to finish in about (30-40 minute session they were rushing me but, I don't think its the issue, Problem is I couldn't feel anything).

is there something wrong with me? is it going to be the same case if I get a girlfriend and have sex with her too?
0 1

Superb Opinion

  • There are a number of factors at play here.

    First thing, Condoms. While it was wise to use a condom while being with a prostitute, or anybody new you met for that matter, condoms deminish sensation in the penis by a hell of a lot. You have a layer of laytext between the nerves in your penis and everything else. They are also usually quite tight, so there's constriction involved where your penis and the skin don't move/flex as much as it would without a condom.

    For me, I barely feel anything with a condom on and feels more like I'm performing glorified push ups. I feel body heat through the condom but that's about it. So that's one problem.

    The second is of course your worries and over thinking during sex. (anxiety) if your head is elsewhere and you're not focusing on what's happening in the now and what you're trying to get pleasure out of, then you have a mental disconnect compounding the physical disconnect with the condom.

    Additionally, when I started having sex, which involved a condom the first few times with my girlfriend, I also didn't orgasm. With my next girlfriend a few years later, the same thing occurred and I didn't orgasm until after the third or forth time having sex. Same thing occurred with my next girlfriend / now wife. No orgasm until a few attempts later. For me, I believe this had to do more with getting to know the other, getting to know their body and mine and how we both do things during sex (moving, grinding, speed and such)

    And even to this very day, no girl has ever made me orgasm through just Oral, despite some really good efforts by some lol.

    Either way, as I see it, it's normal. At the same time though, trying to figure things out using prostitutes is probably not the best way to go. You're going to want to figure out your sex stuff with an actual partner/girlfriend you know more about, who you feel comfortable around and whom you can take your time with and not have a clock ticking and money involved. You need to remove all those pressures and uncertainty of being with someone you know nothing about and be in an environment where you can focus more on the pleasures and just the two of you.

    If later down the road you want to kick it with prostitutes or sleep around with more people or do whatever, that's your prerogative... But starting out, you're better off with someone you have some connection too.

    • That was very informative man, thanks. I also noticed that My dick would always slip out very often is that normal. I am just 5 in length and 2.5-3 in girth?

    • I don't know measurements and such, other than between 5 and 6 being about average length. Slipping out happens more often with smaller penises, sure, but it also happens from lack of experience and knowledge towards your partner. It takes time between two people to figure out your grooves and grinding rhythms. That's also why it took me a while to get to an orgasm point with my partners. They'd do what they knew from past relationships, while I did the same. Sometimes they'd be on an angle that doesn't sit right with me and sometimes it was me on an odd angle or we'd bounced together out of rhythm and it'd slip. After a day or two, we'd figure each other out, things would be more smooth and the level of pleasure for both of us increased. Each person is different in both shape/size as well as what each likes and doesn't, so only time with each other will improve the experience.

    • Thanks

Most Helpful Guy

  • ok brother there's a few things you can do. #1 get a penis pump. this will improve overall vascular development in your wiener. #2 resist jerking off. wait a week or so and have sex again.

    a lot of what your experiencing is going to be psychological and possibly side effects of drugs for depression.

    definitely find a situation where you don't feel rushed and try to take a tantric approach. if your solely focused on blowing your load your not focusing on the moment.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 12

  • Pretty sure your anxiety is getting the better of you. Work on that and things will improve

  • Read the list of side-effects for the antidepressants you have been using.

  • Anti depressants can mess with a male orgasm. Talk with your doctor about switching to a different med. Can you orgasm when you jerk off?

  • It's the anti depressants I'm afraid, some are know to have this side effect. Go speak to your doctor about it and look at changing to a different one.

  • Could have been the condom or because u was anxious

  • Diabetes

  • I don't know if you are on Adderall, but that can make it very difficult to have an orgasm.

  • And if you masturbate? Do you cum then?
    Perhaps you need the security of a real relationship to open enough to cum.

    • Yes, I can cum from masturbation, but I think it is also one of the reasons, I use a lot of pressure and friction

  • That's rare maybe you are affected by medication. Try to stay away from meds for few days and try to have sex.

  • Try to replace meds with workout and meditation, find a girlfriend and lose the condom. it might take some time for you to figure out how to do it right but you will get there

  • It’s the medicine that you are taking that is causing the problem so you’ll need to stop taking the medicine for a while

  • This question reminds me that I'm considering an escort just to end a dry spell and gain more sexual experience

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