Should I be worried when my friends with benefits says he won’t eat me out?

[Anonymous]

i’ve been friends with benefits with this guy for a couple weeks (since like the week before Thanksgiving) and everything is fine he’s already well in tune with my body and me with his for the most part. he’s been very clear that he’s more worried about pleasing me rather than the reverse, but when i say i wanna please him he doesn’t complain (which makes sense). this last meet up we had, he was laying between my thighs, kinda using one as a pillow as we watched this movie that came out in ‘08 and after it was over he was kinda in the mood and so was i. he was like really close to down there so he was like “alright i’ll try” and i wasn’t gonna say no as i’ve never had any bad experiences with guys going down on me. he ended up stopping almost immediately and we just did the normal thing we do yk. later that night (i stayed over) he told me that the first girl he went down on didn’t take good care of herself and it tasted like how propane smells, so i kinda get why he’d be put off by it but he also mentioned a lot that i wasn’t bad, just unique. now he’s never forced me to go down on him so i’m not gonna force him to go down on me. i’m just curious if he’s likely to be saying “i’m unique” because i wasn’t as clean as i thought i was. i did shower when i got there and i changed into clean clothing but i’m still not sure since i’m kinda familiar with how my body smells and can be really paranoid.

should i be paranoid about this or is it something i really don’t need to worry about?

[mk200195]

Fear of the unknown and fear of being really bad at it. Most guys have a hard time letting their ego get in the way, especially when it comes to sex. We want women to think we know everything there is to know about sex, when the truth is most of us don't really know shit about female anatomy.

I was fortunate to have a girlfriend in college who was very enthusiastic about receiving oral sex and very patient to teach me how to make it the best for her, but I can tell you that up to that time, I would not do it because I was afraid I would have no idea what to do once I got down there and thus come off like an idiot.

That experience gave me the confidence to do it with other partners and the more you do it, the better you get. Now I love it and can say that it is one of my favorite activities, but I would have never gotten there without an enthusiastic teacher. ( I can't totally discount the age factor either, the younger guys are the more selfish we tend to be about sex. I don't know how old the OP is, but you might have to date a little older to find an enthusiastic oral sex partner. )

My advice is be patient, but willing to let your partner know what you want and how you want it. But you have to do it in such a way that it strokes his ego as you are teaching him.

[Anonymous]

That bad experience is "ingrained" in his mind. It's like if you ate something that was bad (food), and got sick, you're probably going to be turned off from eating that again, even if it's perfectly ok right? Same here. Either that or he's worried about STI's, especially if you guys aren't "exclusive"? Or, maybe he's just not a fan of it in general? But my guess is it's that bad experience that has turned him off of it. So you can try talking with him about it, if you can "convince" him to try, he might realize yours is nice and enjoy it again? lol But I wouldn't take this personally. It's not you likely.

[kyleelyn199723]

Sounds like his own personal excuse on why he won’t eat you out. He probably pretended to want to please you, when in reality he’s more about pleasing himself. A guy that wants to please you won’t make excuses

[DaveJord]

If he is only a friends with benefits, no you don't have to worry that's the point of just being friends with benefits. If he isn't't doing it for you then find another one.

He has the right to not do that. I only eat out women I am serious about, I have no idea where or who else a friends with benefits has been or is being with other than myself.

[Avicenna]

I don't think it has anything to do with you. However, most guys won't go down on a woman they assume is also having sex with other men (which you usually assume a friends with benefits does).

[Zebadee88]

All bets are off when you are dumb enough to set up friends with benefits. Just my opinion. Get a true partner and he will eat you until you beg him to stop.

[Twalli]

I don't think you need to worry. It doesn't sound like he knows how it's supposed to taste.

[In_Trance]

Not sure what they're is to worry about

[andy530]

My opinion: if he won’t go down on you frequently you need a new friends with benefits

[Oh-canada]

Way to long a read for me. But yes. You should. Either he doesn’t do that which is a red flag or you smell bad. That is also a red flag.