What do you tell the hospital when you've injured your penis?

[purplepoppy]

It seemed like a good idea at the time. After all, What could go wrong if you stuck your dick in it? But things didn't work out as planned, instead of mind blowing orgasmic pleasure you're now in agony being rushed to A&E.

You know they're going to ask what happened so are you going to tell the truth or what is your go to excuse?

[Ez-Bri-Z]

"Oh man, autocorrect screwed me over BADLY here. I was trying to just get a hot sexual experience to get my sausage serviced if you catch my drift. Anyway, I was told do a Google search for this thing called Grindr... long story short... can you get this thing off me and save my dick?"

I dont care that this was for the guys. I still like telling jokes.

[wingattebaby16]

kinda hard to break a penis..

I know there is a Shaft Break thing.

More likely, "sir, how did you get a knitting needle stuck in your penis?"

or, "so sir, how did you get a billiard ball stuck up your butt? and is that a vibrator the xray shows inside?"

[silkjames]

That's would be funny I would lol and tell the truth I get the whole staff at the hospital lol 😂 but thats if I had to go which would be NEVER lol I gone all day and night plenty of times just give me a bag of ice and 10, 15, 20 mins I'm good to go again hey my home boy be hurting IL troop through it saying OUCH I'm good ouch bahahahaha lol 😂🥰😂!!!

[AustinMan]

Just say I've injured my penis. Trust me, they've heard it before.

[MrOracle]

"Help Doc! I broke my dick!"

[Lliam]

I swan dived into her but miscalculated.

[molonski2]

Question with a question? What do you tell the hospital if you have a large beer bottle trapped in the virgina? Possibly its the same answer :)

[dustybiker]

That’s a hell of a pickle.

[NathanDavis]

I tripped on it...

[DonkeyDan]

Well while not actually Dick, but Tom and Harry having been injured, after a heavy session of piledriver,
and having to be rushed into emergency surgery. I told the whole truth in graphic detail. I think they all got a kick out of it.

[Citizenkirk]

Don't lie to medical staff, because you will regret it if you do. Chances are, you are not the first knucklehead they have had to treat for such an ailment.

[exitseven]

I know a lot of paramedics and they have all kinds of stories about people doing this. The people in the emergency room have seen it all and already know what you have been up to.

[Angelo75]

You could start singing the song:
"Nico & Vinz - That's How You Know feat. Kid Ink & Bebe Rexha"

Look it up. The video is hilarious.

[genericname85]

yo tell them what happened. because lying to them will likely mess shit up

[Iron_Man]

My girlfriend Broke me in half

[Wise4myage]

The truth.

[nocturnalbreed]

I would say a wild night or fell down the stairs trying to close the zip

[LegendaryIcon]

wouldn't it depend?

[whosnumber1]

would be more embarrassing I think to still have that thing you stuck your dick in attached. like a bottle or something. lol

[Honestguyopen]

Honesty is the best policy.

[emperor90]

Just be honest and tell them

[hhhffg7889]

I'd just tell her I think I broke my dick. She's 28 and really cool about stuff

[LaMiSch]

Rule number one in everything you do: How do you explain that to the doctor? If you don't have a meaningful explanation, leave it

[Waldoe]

it happened many years ago, I lied, I said I fell... he know I was lying, but let it go...