*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your "Safe Word"?

WHAT IS A SAFE WORD? A safe word is a single word that will immediately stop your BDSM scene right then and there.

WHY ARE SAFE WORDS IMPORTANT? It could be a number of things, the most important being that the scene may have gone too far and you have experienced a level of pain or discomfort above and beyond what you had anticipated.
OMG! ... That hurts so good!
OMG! ... That hurts so good!
GOOD AND BAD SAFE WORDS - KNOW THE DIFFERENCE

What is a good vs bad safe word?

Did you know that not all words are good to use as a safe word?

For instance you would never want to use "STOP" or "NO". But why not you ask?

Let's say that you are roll-playing a scene about "being forced to have sex" ... you know, the "R" word.

You'd really be surprised at what the surveys show about how many girls fantasize about that. In fact it is #1 on her list of fantasies... no, I am not kidding!

Exploring the Top Ten Fantasies of all Time!

So if you are playing that, you have to ask yourself - what words are going to be commonly used in that roll-play scene?

How about "NO" or "Stop"? But in that scene those words will make his attack even more intense and will serve to just excite and stimulate him to get even more dominant.
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
Yes, you must pick a word that will most likely not be used in whatever BDSM experience you are having that evening, right?

THE TRAFFIC LIGHT SYSTEM Now, let's talk about the traffic light system of safe wording. It is really pretty easy and self explanatory. Here goes... If you say "Green" to your partner, that means, "I am loving this! Keep going!" "YELLOW" means, "I want to keep going but slow it down a bit, it has reached my threshold, so don't escalate it any further". "RED" means "STOP IMMEDIATELY, IT'S OVER, I QUITE, YOU NO LONGER HAVE MY CONSENT!"
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
So I was prompted to do this post by a sweet GAG member who asked me what I thought of her trying a forced sex scene. I forgot to tell her to be sure to pick a safe word.

So, this post is just for you my sweet friend :)
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
I have never done a roll-play or any other scene doing BDSM
Vote A
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
I have done BDSM scenes but never used a "Safe Word"
Vote B
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
I have done BDSM scenes and did have a safe word picked out in case it was needed
Vote C
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
I would like to try a beginers role play scene and will definitely take your advice and use a safe word
Vote D
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
I have no intention of doing a BDSM scene, safe word or no safe word
Vote E
*ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your Safe Word?
OTHER, see my comments below, or just open the "BDSM Safe Word" Survey
Vote F
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Girl Guy
2 4

Most Helpful Guys

  • I think that you forgot to say that, the most important thing is that the submissive needs to be comfortable choose. For beginner Stop can be a good option because learn the color system or have the reflex to use an uncommon word can be hard in the moment for a beginner. But I agree that use no as a safe word is not possible because if as a Dom I ask a question to my sub and she want it need to answer no it is confusing.


    It also depends on the type of dynamic. If it the submissive enjoy a lot what’s happening there is not reason to say Stop. With a brat (Someone who likes to disobey) or someone who likes to resist, an special safeword should be used.


    Moreover you didn't mention that safoword can be a gesture/sign, in case the submissive is unable to talk or move. An object can also be placed in the hand and dropped to stop the action.

    • I realized that I should have made this a myTake instead of a question at the end as a myTake allows 10 times as many characters, 20,000 versus 2,000 and I used my max without being able to cover everything. I could have switched to the myTake but it would have taken more time and effort than I have to expend, so sorry it's not an exhaustive study of the subject :(

      Don't spank me too hard... lol
      *ATTENTION BDSM LOVERS* - What is your "Safe Word"?

    • Yes a myTake would have been better. I didn't knew about the character limit. You are forgiven 😏 the intend was good, you could deserve a reward for you text cdn.sex.com/.../20368765.gif?width=460

    • Sadly my sensual gif of a spanking is not working.

    • Show All
  • I'm just gonna leave this right here...

    https://www.youtube.com/embed/1NmYUUv8DUE
    • A definite GOLD STAR! ... that was way too funny Mr O... lol

    • Yeah, this is exactly what I was thinking but I can't recall ever seeing this specific scene.

    • @Shark_61695 They cut most (or all?) of that out of the "edited for TV" version, so maybe that's what you saw. Euro Trip is a hilarious movie...

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girls

  • when i had a partner for that we had it under control... often i'd take a paddle spanking and that was until my ass turned bright red... and then he'd get his blowjob... we also did chain a small chain in my crack that actually felt good because it gave me shocks through my ass somehow... that was never pain where you needed to stop... then there was the belt where i agreed to 20 lashes each time and that was followed by a blowjob... my partner loved blowjobs after a whipping or a spanking... so if there was a safety it was just ok or enough and of course i had to give the blowjob no matter what... i liked it that way as well... and i was often in a panties gater belt nylon heels type outfit... sometimes totally nude... definitely got adrnelaine rushes from the activity and very high alert and felt extemely sexual and hot.

  • I dont do pain, but I do get involved with scenes that involve dom/sub dynamics. Typically if I'm getting out of my comfort zone we roll with a traffic light system.

    • Nice! :)

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 15
  • I've done BDSM scenes and lived TPE (Total Power Exchange) lifestyles. there was ALWAYS a safe-word known by all people involved. To do otherwise is an invitation to disaster. With no safeword, safety is compromised and consent can be too easily violated. That can lead to medical and mental problems at minimum, and could have dire legal consequences when boundaries are violated.

  • Not intended as safe words but I can recall "too much!" and/or "too far!" and/or "enough!" have blasted outta my mouth occasionally.

  • Traffic light system is my usual depends who I'm doing the scene with if it's my regular partner we are very experienced together and don't tend to need one as we know what eachother enjoys and our soft and hard limits and if we ever push those consent will always be obtained first so "safe words" aren't really needed for our dynamic

  • It depends on my sub, how experienced they are, and my relationship to them.

  • B: I have done BDSM scenes and did have a safe word picked out in case it was needed. But i used it once in all these years. The Mrs is not a fan even though i beged her to hurt me more but NOPE. The word was (peach) and i used it because my chest hair started burning and it was close to the beard 🤣

  • I'd say C and F apply to me, I've had various safe words that we had picked out, but I've never used it. ;-)

  • Safe words are for encounters with "pro's". If you're in a trusted relationship, you don't need one.

  • PEACHES lol

  • What’s your safe word?

  • We should come up with a standard safe word, everyone will a accept a safe word given by you to use.

  • "Yo yo yo yo, aye. Let's calm down a bit Ma'am!"

  • We go with the basic red and yellow. Red means stop , yellow means don't go further/harder.

  • It's simple and easy to remember stop say it 3 times in a row

  • If gets rough i use pineapple

  • Seems like too much work!!

    Just fuck. Cum. And be done.

  • Thanks a lot dude, that's informative

  • I clicked on the wrong button. "Safe word" is essential before you start.

  • Mine is I know no safe word

  • Easy to remember words and hand gestures. Slapping the ground repeatedly when she can't talk. etc.