My husband want me to have a “white girl” personality.. ?

[Anonymous]

Yeah, the tittle is real lol.
long story short, I’m a Latina, born an raise in Colombia, I came to USA and I meet my now husband a American man, well lately we been having some issues, my husband want me to have a “white girl” personality as he told me.. all his exes were white girls, not the typical white girl, they were ratchet, hood white girls, he used to be a drug dealer on this younger days, so he is used to that kind of woman, I’m totally the opposite, so I honestly don’t know why he is with me, he told me that I’m “ sexually basic” , nobody had ever told me that, and I know that I’m not, one thing that I knew is that sexually I never had any insecurities until I met him.
He likes hardcore sex and threesomes, but he hide all those feelings from me, he told me how he did all kind of kinky and crazy sexual stuff but he NEVER have sex with me, and he never do anything of that with me.,
I’m undergoing surgery soon, because I’m thinking that he will like me more if I get more prettier but I honestly don’t understand him. It is something wrong with me?
***** I’m sorry if my writing isn’t perfect, English is my second language. *****

[Adam1978]

Sounds like he is the one with issues and you can't fix his issue by going under the knife. You made a bad call when you picked him. Drugdealers should be rejected as the lowlife criminals they are. And in my opinion so should guys that sleep around. But that must come from a majority of women. Aslong as women sleep with bad men, bad men will sleep with them. Only you women can decide what traits of men that survive to next generation. You can cull human tendencies and over thousands of years it will change if the culture sticks to it.

[globetrotter22]

With all do respect your husband sounds like a selfish piece of shit. Are you married to him for financial and/or green card reasons? If yes he sadly has leverage on you and he knows it.

The irony is American white women particularly liberal white women (and most white women i let are on the left) have some of the most conceited, self centered and miserable personalities on the planet. I have traveled extensively and I often feel frustrated and ashamed about how my country’s women behave.

Anyway you do deserve better than this. Again are you married for money reasons?

[Asker]

He has control over me. And we have a baby, he threatens me all the time that he is going to take her away from me. I live a miserable life, with a man that reminds me everyday how ugly, and skinny I am, is constant abuse. But I can’t just change my race, this is who I am and I can’t be white like he want me to.

[globetrotter22]

Are you a naturalized citizen?

[Hangry06]

Maybe he is bitter that you aren't sexually adventurous

[ohshee]

Give him a little present next time you go to the store get a training bra and some red lipstick and tell him you're just going to act like a little girl and you might as well dress like one two

[DonkeyDan]

There is nothing wrong with you, and everything wrong with him. Stop trying to be somebody else for him, and divorce that son of a bitch.

[Asker]

Thank you 😞

[slatyb]

Cancel the surgery and the marriage.

[Dargil]

That means "main stream". You can do it. Italians have maintained two cultures for generations.

[Dargil]

Please don't alter your body for him. He should accept you as you are. My wife is Philippine. Not much up top. I would never ask her to have a boob job.

[Wester1967]

Run for the hills. Read Frantz Fanon's book "Black Skin White Masks"... It is a real shot of triple espresso

[awkward_author]

Don't get surgery for anyone, aside from yourself. If he wants to change you completely, you deserve better than him. Find someone who appreciates and loves who you are. That being said, if it just comes down to sexual stuff, would you be willing to explore that a bit?

[FýrdracaDócincel]

At the very least drop the latina personality.

The neighbors don't need to be woken up by your screaming.. and your husband doesn't need to be made fun of everywhere he goes because you gave him a black eye.

[Cowboy6666]

I am sorry to say but he doesn't deserve you.

[Asker]

Do you think there’s something wrong with me? I’m trying to be enough for him, but every attempt that I make is just not enough, he don’t even let me kiss him, he get angry every time

[Cowboy6666]

Sounds like he lost interest already or seeing someone else

[LaMiSch]

Don't undergo surgery just to please him. Please. If he doesn't value you for who you are, then I don't see any point in your relationship. sorry 🙈

[Anonymous]

HAHAHAH

and he picked a latina lol
good luck

[Anonymous]

Why did you marry this idiot? My advice is to run and far from him, don’t alter your looks for him

[Anonymous]

I don't know why he's with you either, or more importantly, WHY ARE YOU WITH HIM? He wants a different person. You are who you are. You can't change that. Forget surgery please! It's not going to change anything. I'd really give some serious thought to why you are with him, because I truly question his feelings for you, or respect. And used to be a drug dealer is another huge red flag and a completely different set of concerns. I'd question the marriage honestly. Consider ending it I think. It's what I'd be doing.

[Anonymous]

Is your husband a black boy?

[Asker]

No, he is white. Really white

[Anonymous]

Why are you in this ridiculous situation?

You shouldn't be getting surgery; you should be getting a divorce.

[Asker]

We have a daughter. I been trying my best to be enough for him but is impossible. The rejection from him is hurtful, I just don’t feel enough.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, that is extremely unfortunate. Only you can decide if you are better off with him than without as the world isn't perfect and although I would like to say that you should just leave, in the real world there are bills to pay and being trapped in a situation can be very real even if its never healthy. What I would stress though is how vital it is that you completely stop trying to please this person, you must live for yourself and make sure you are happy and healthy within yourself. You absolutely should not be getting surgery. Children do not learn from what you tell them, they copy what you are. People will treat you as well or as badly as you allow them to, its past time that you learned to respect yourself and demand that others respect you too.