Sexual Relationships
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I'm curious and a bit confused about my sexuality/gender identity. I'm not sure what I'd be "considered as"?

I never put much thought into my sexuality and gender identity because it's never been a problem for me. But recently I've become pretty curious about it. When it comes to attraction I consider attractive men and women beautiful/good looking but in like piece of artwork kind of way, like a beautiful portrait or a marble statue. I'm only really attracted in a sexual way to feminine looking men e. g. slim figure, longish hair, soft facial features, and I find eyeliner and nail polish attractive on them too. There have been some exceptions because personality does play a role in my sexual attraction to people. As for my gender identity, I like to think of myself as a girl, I like to dress like a girl, I like to do girly thing and act girly, but I also like dressing up in a more masculine way and I enjoy things that aren't really considered girly. All of that isn't that relevant because it could just mean I have a tomboy side. In my relationship I like to do things that the guy would typically do e. g. get my boyfriend flowers and chocolates, when we sit on the couch together I put my arm over his shoulders etc. Weird but not too unusual. Now the that makes me wonder is how it effects my sexuality, I like sex the usual ways, I also like being dominated and dominating, but I'm turned on by taking on then role of the guy too, basically wearing a strap on while having sex with a guy. I'd probably still be turned on by using it on a girl but not be turned on by the girl. Like the idea of filling the role of the guy is what turns me on. But like I mentioned I also like to be dominated by a guy. Possibly unrelated but I really like boobs, I like to look at boobs and I have a preference on which ones I like and dont like, I'm not turned on by boobs but I appreciate looking at a nice pair and watching them bounce, I also really like playing with my boobs. Anyways back to my question, is all of this normal and just not spoken about much or am I like gender fluid or something?
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Superb Opinion

  • Gender fluid people are individuals whose gender varies over time. A gender-fluid person may at any time identify as male, female, agender, other nonbinary identities, or some combination of identities. They may feel more like one gender on some days and another gender on other days. Gender fluid has more to do with gender identity and not sexual orientation. In fact, gender fluidity does not affect sexual preferences or orientation.

    Don't waste your energy trying to change opinions. Do your thing, and don't care if they like it. Owning your story and loving yourselves through that process is the bravest thing that you'll ever do. One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”

    • Thanks, I love myself the way I am and don't really care about what others think of me, I'm just curious because i haven't really met anyone who is similar to me and was wondering if I am "alone" in the way I am (which is statistically impossible) or if it's more common than I think. For instance if I did "fit into" some known category it would basically be like "hey here's a group of individuals that may be similar to you".

    • It's OK to not pick one label over another if you don't want to or if you identify on a spectrum because your identity is more fluid. If you feel safe and comfortable, you can speak up and share how you identify—even if how you identify is to not label yourself. Pomosexual. A term (not necessarily an identity) used to refer to those who reject sexuality labels or don't identify with any of them.

    • Hmm thanks you've given me something to think about. For now I'll just stick to identifying as a girl with possibly unusual interests.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I would really try not to label yourself, just enjoy life and live it to the max.

    If you are bisexual, gender fluid, etc, does it really change who you are as a person, you are still you.

    Some days you like wake up and think one thing, other days something else.

    Attraction is always a hard one and I pretty much give up with it lol, we are attracted to who we are attracted to, often with no real reason behind it or it’s complex.

    if you were really really interested you can get an assessment done.

    There is also nothing wrong with bouncing around between D and s side of things, it’s about exploring your limits and boundaries and that of your partner (s).

Most Helpful Girl

  • You don’t need any labels. Just be your own person and enjoy.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 12

  • You're you. You like what you like. I doubt there's a single word to define that. Just because I'm straight doesn't mean I like all women. Just because I like petite women doesn't mean I like all petite women.

    • True, I am me and I am happy the way I am. No idea if I could be considered "normal" but hey at least I'm not boring lol.

    • In all seriousness though, attraction and sexuality is pretty complex. It will never be able to be simplified enough to fully categorize people. People can be similar and have similar thoughts and feelings but no one will ever be identical.

  • Tomboy and gender fluid is a similar thing.

  • Are you refering to like drawing or sculpting a model? I've bedn thinking about doing life modelling

    • Sadly I have no artistic talent in that sense but I view Male and Female beauty the way others may view a sunset or a breathtaking landscape. To me the human body is a work of art and every "flaw" on it adds to it's charm. I like to admire peoples looks the way most people admire natures beauty. If I was any good at drawing I'd probably draw them but sadly for now everyone will have to settle for a picture of a disfigured stickman.

    • Let me know. U gotta practice somewhere

  • You're human, why try to put some label on you, just because it's what some others do.

    You sound perfectly normal to me. Accept who you are... without a label.

  • I think you're a straight woman.

  • Does it have to be defined? You do you.

  • That's hot you would wear a strap on :)

  • Labels are only helpful for quickly conveying ideas, they dont mean anything and you dont have to be a particular thing.

    I would describe you as a straight cis female switch with a preference for slim emo guys.

  • Gender fluid is a fad. In 10-20 years no one will consider themselves gender fluid short of serious mental illness. Most of the things you have talked about are style or sexual kinks. They have no bearing on your gender identity and little on your sexual orientation.

  • You're a pretty little girl. That's your gender Identity. Stop labeling yourself. Never try to define yourself. You're a girl just like how you said you are.

  • Nothing you have described would suggest you have an gender identity issues, your feeling around gender are mainly based on sex and that is not the same as feeling like a man when you're a women. It's more to do what the everyday things that make you feel that you should be a man. Regarding your sexuality you sound pretty straight with some fluidity and kinks towards the female form and male roleplay. I don't think you have any sexual or gender identity issues at all.

  • You are female. You were born a female. You will. always be female. You cannot change gender. Your gender is in your DNA code.

    • Technically speaking yes, but I can also be whatever I want to be, my only limit is my imagination.

    • It doesn't work that way. You can say what you want, but you will always be female.

    • Physically yes but in my mind I can be anything, even a potato if I really want to be.

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  • You would be considered a clown

    • A funny clown or one that murders people?

    • Neither

    • That's probably for the best because the only jokes I can make are terrible puns and I'm too short and weak to murder people in a physically demanding way. I could probably kill people handing out poisoned cotton candy but I don't think I'd have many victims like that. Alternatively I could be a depressed clown that artists like to paint pictures of for some reason.

    • Show All

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