Friends with benefits falling in love?

[Anonymous]

He is my friends with benefits. We are both 25. he's a bartender and we met at the bar where he works. However, since the last 1 year or 8 months, he was watching a girl at his university. He never spoke to her nor made any moves but stare at her a lot. The girl eventually spoke to him after a few months when she noticed him staring blatantly.

They exchanged numbers and even went on a coffee date. However, he likes casual relationships and even with her, he was wanting sexual things. She , on the other hand was more interested in knowing him and spending time talking to him rather than intimacy or sex.

They never kissed nor had sex so he got annoyed and stop seeing her. However, he wanted her to text him but she stopped texting him after he didn't reply to her texts. But he always wanted her to text him and seems really bothered that she doesn't. She does chat with him in person and his friend said they get along very well.

He even remembers the things she told him, he notices her hairstyles, her clothes , he checks her out a lot though. He was also pretty curious to know if she was dating someone. To which she said she wasn't.

Then his friend told me that they were in the library , heading towards the lift and when my friends with benefits saw the shelves which contained books related to economics (the subject she graduated in) he stopped and was looking at the racks until she saw them and he ran away quickly. He only said hi to her later on and acted cold towards her.

Then she told him about how her tutor wears a beanie and the next thing I know, he showed up in a beanie. He didn't see her but when he came over to have sex with me, he had his beanie on.

He still keeps her number even though he's very bitter that she doesn't text him and he doesn't text her either. He sleeps with me and texts me. So he doesn't like her at all,?

[MrCommodore]

Friends with Benefits is supposed to give no string sex until one person finds a suitable relationship partner. It sounds like your friends with benefits feels attracted to that girl and maybe has a crush on her, I can't see him simply wanting sex from her, as heis using you for sex.

So my conclusion is that he sees her as a potential girlfriend, he is trying to be the dominant partner, but she isn't that into him.
At this point you should be ending your friends with benefits situation, as he is likely going to date her, and your situation will be enabling him to cheat then.

[Asker]

But she talks to him each time she sees him, he's the one keeping distant from her?

[MrCommodore]

It doesn't matter what they do, he initiates by staring and making it obvious that he is into her. He is playing hard to get, as he knows it increases a girls interest. Look friends with benefits usually suits guys better, as they don't catch feelings by just having sex, they take full advantage of the no strings sex with no intention of ever having a relationship. You need to move on, as the fact you're asking these questions suggests you are probably into him. Don't let him continue to use you.

[Asker]

But how does this work? He's not even talking to her

[charon142]

i don't think this is love or if it is, it's not a strong one
I think he sees her as more of a sex doll rather than a loved one
talking is a big part of a relationship even if you don't have sex at all, and if he can't stand not having sex and neither the talking then he should not even try to get into a fake bubbly relationship with her

[Asker]

They never has sex

[charon142]

So? You can have a relationship from start to finish without sex at all He just can't handle the not having sex part

[TANMAN55555]

Sex tricks you into thinking you are in love

Guess what happens in the future? Cupcake phase wears off and divorce happens

[DonkeyDan]

How many different ways you going to phrase this same question everyday?
He still has feelings for her and is not in love with you, get over it!

[Asker]

He doesn't text or meet her and you say he has feelings?

[Anonymous]

That happens a lot, so it doesn't surprise me in the least.

[Asker]

What happens a lot?

[Opinion Owner]

friends with benefits falling in love.

[Asker]

I'm asking about him and the girl. Did you even read the question?