Advice on my current friends with benefits situation?

[Anonymous]

So, I was recently introduced to a girl through a friend. Initially, I wasent attracted to her and viewed her as a friend. Long story short, after a few months I have discovered that she actually possesses a lot of the qualities I look for in a woman and she could actually be quite a good fit for me.
Here's the issue, as soon as I mentioned that I like her and could see her as a potential partner, she pulled away. I also noticed she never initiates contact with me, she didn't really initiate it from the start. So basically, I have fallen in love with her and she's pretty much out the door! Should I chase or did I blow my load too early! (sorry)

Further information.

-She would always reply to my invitations with, 'I'll let you know' or 'let's go with the flow'.
- She is 31 and I am 34.
- She's a good girl, or so it would seem?
- friends with benefits situation for a few months.
-I have a 5 year old son with my ex partner, which I've told her about.
-I'm a decent looking dude, bit of a renegade at times. Decent income. Slightly under 6ft. Lol

I feel as if she has masterfully manipulated me into submission because I said we would make good friends first! Does she want to teach me a lesson? Do women do this kind of thing and if so why? Is she trying to boost her self esteem here or what? Or worst case, was she just not into me from the get go!
Hope this all makes sense! I'm ADHD, the real ADHD.

[Secret6620]

I think she only wanted a friends with benefits situation. You admitting that you want something more, more than likely pushed her away. My advice is to never be a friends with benefits.

Go into relationships for the long term that way you're both on the same page.

[Asker]

May I ask why women actually bother with a friends with benefits situation?

[Secret6620]

I don't believe in friends with benefits. So I don't know.

[Secret6620]

Yay! Superb opinion ✨️

[RobT312]

Dont be so submissive and desperate and give her space. Girls don’t like desperate and weak guys.
Go try and date some other people... be in high demand... go with the flow as she says and maybe she will come around... she’ll realize what she’s missing... give her a challenge

[Asker]

I'm far from weak my brother, I've dated some real bad bz. Haven't mentioned it because I'm not a dick. Truth is she caught me by surprise, she's a sweetie and I overlooked her. Sad really.

[RobT312]

Good to hear. Anyways if u really like her I wouldn’t give up,

[Asker]

Mate, if I were you stay off these sites because literally everyone who has offered advice was WRONG. I've had a heartfelt chat with the bird and I literally got it all wrong. I was right all along. Trust your Instincts!

[Avicenna]

Well, if you can tell she doesn’t want more, don’t force it

[Asker]

The sad thing is, I think she actually did want more but she's in a fragile state of mind herself. Thanks anyway.

[WhitneySnow]

I don’t think she’s that into you. She does like the sex though or she wouldn’t be your friends with benefits. You’d just be regular friends.

[Asker]

Fair play. You win some you loose some.

[Anonymous]

You are thinking about this friends with benefits situation too much. Just go with the flow.

[Asker]

Yes, I am a chronic overthinker! Thanks.