My boyfriend feels bad because he “can’t” make me cum?

[Anonymous]

How do I encourage my boyfriend and help him help me reach an orgasm when we’re together?

[mstbooblover]

An embarrassing situation not to be under estimated. If you trust and love each other, first thing to do is dare to talk openly. Tell your boyfriend casually what arises you, what spots on your body you'd like to be taken care of. There are also some interesting positions where during intercourse you can finger yourself. Maybe you can show him how you masturbate in order for him to understand, be it already only because every normal person has fingers to use... I don't think most female orgasms occur during plain intercourse... My idea is often "ladies first" ;0)

[Finchie40]

Tell him what turns you on , when a guy loves a girl he wants to please her if she isn’t pleased he feels like a failure , Is he ejaculating too fast? Or do you just have a rough time getting there? Maybe slow down in bed , think about what really turns you on , Do other things to each other before penetration occurs , Have him eat you out or have him watch you play with yourself , once you feel ready tell him to stick it in , you got to remember you both aren’t mind readers so to make sex better you both have to express what turns you on the most

[mandyfire98]

Communication is key. Everybody is different in what makes them tick. Don't just have a mentality of he should just figure it out. It's not a game. Communicate to him what you like, what you don't like. Show him when it's possible.

[OlderAndWiser]

Tell him what makes you feel aroused and then make some kind of noises - moaning, groaning - so he knows when he is doing something right. If necessary, give him a show and demonstrate on yourself. Use positive reinforcement and don't be too negative if he tries something that doesn't work for you. Instead of "don't do that" or "that doesn't feel good," try "it would feel even better if you _____."

[jshm2]

Practice.

That's the thing about good sex, you reach it eventually and sensually.

[20yearsolder]

Can you orgasm when you masturbate? If you can, let him watch you masturbate and point out exactly what you're doing. It will help him learn to pleasure you

[wilxcool]

You just have to guide him and tell him what you like and don't like. Maybe try foreplay, toys, maybe finding out any kinks you have.

[Nmdr3]

Maybe get him to use toys on you or ask what his fantasy is or urs? As in he could tie you up if your into that but has to be consensual and have safe words, etc.

[AviatorTom]

Show him how you pleasure yourself, masturbate for him and encourage him to help out.

[UniquelyBasic]

Learn to give yourself one first then you can teach him what feels good for you.

[Fireguy17]

Let him know what works for you, what position is best.
I had an ex that could only cum when she was on top, so while we did just about any position during, we always finished with her on top, so she could have her happy ending
So people have a difficult time cumming during intercourse, so get a vibrator and hold that while he is going at it.
Sometimes that is all you need.
Don't worry about it talk to him and work it out.

[AustinTXGuy]

Can you get yourself to orgasm? If yes, then show him what to do. Every woman is complex and there is no shame in using communication to find out what works for someone. Also, if tension has built up during relations bc you and he both know he's trying his hardest to get you off, get all that off yalls chests before trying. All that pressure to orgasm is just going to make it that much harder for you to be relaxed and ready to orgasm. If you have a hard time finding orgasm, lets chat more.

[bowenw]

A few girls I've been with have had that same issue and touch themselves during sex.

[Subarugirl]

Comunication

[genericname85]

well i think it's appropriate to feel bad about this as a guy. though since you're not running away and giving him the opportunity to learn and improve... that's like... you can't do more than that for him.

[ImNoOne111]

It might be he thinks he can't. If he gets performance stress, his performance will get a decrease in quality. So he might need some help with confidence. And 90% of girls can't climax with clitoral simulation. Teach him how to focus more on it. If you think there is something wrong, there is no problem with going to a doctor

[Philyouup]

magic wand the big plug in types.

[RuthlessAggression]

I don't know because I still believe the female orgasm is a myth. However try googling it to see if there are some ways you can get to "orgasm" quicker

[DizzyAster2]

Has he tried oral, particularly the clitoris? That has a high success rate for female orgasm.

[bamesjond0069]

Just tell him what he needs to do.

[justaskme555555]

talk dirty and play with yourself and find what makes him hot

[In_Trance]

Encourage him? What do you do, wave pom-poms? " good job buddy, you got this"!!

[OnTheLevel]

Show him what gets you off. Give him instruction as to what feels good and what is just passing time.