Guys, Will you Marry a Girl who was raped?

Question

Have you ever met a Girl who was raped?

DJB72 · Accepted Answer

I wish fewer of my female friends had been assaulted and/or raped.

Being raped by someone doesn't change who a woman is at her core. It DOES mean how she relates to men might change.

I'm very blessed in that two of my closest female friends who suffered this horrific assault on their body felt they could turn to me for support. They're like little sisters to me to the point where neither of them is prepared to tell me the identity of their attacker because they know I'll end up doing time if they do.

I consider rape to be worse than murder. At least if you kill someone it's over. Raping scars emotionally. My best friend's daughter was raped aged 3 ten years ago. The prosecution "counselling service" interviews her twice a week to make sure her story is consistent. The defence has dragged it out now for a decade so this poor child is emotionally raped twice a week until the trial finally happens.

Again, my friend refuses to tell me who did it because I'll crucify him and feed him his own balls. Sorry if that thought upsets you admins. I came up with it before I watched Reacher.

shanshu · Accepted Answer

I would but I wouldn't know how to proceed forward if we got physical id be too afraid to touch her incase she hesitated or if she was ok with it is still be afraid incase she froze and I didn't realise.

I guess for awhile we would just take our relationship slow and cuddle up to a film or something and get used to us being physical in a non sexual way so she feels comfortable around me and with me.

Then I'd talk to her about the next step and say if we did have sex I'd like her to take control like be on top just so I know she's ok with it and then go slowly from there to meeting on top or behind and if she feels close to a fear or panic attack she should tell me and I will stop.

jeffiner · Answer

I can't answer that question, per-say, so I will answer from what I think is most women's point of view..
After rape, there's 1 of 4 ways she will transform.. she'll either Hold on to it, fall into it, run from it or she'll grow from it.
Holding on causes the fear of intimacy, sex, abandonment, depression etc. Relationships with this transformation don't ever last but are difficult and draining to the very end
Falling into it makes them detached from sex but yearning to feel the passion and never finding it. They search constantly, moving onto the next in no time. They don't have relationships,
Running from it causes them to suppress it which in turn gives them fears that they can't explain and eventually it all comes out at once. These ones have relationships that are rocky usually because there's a lot of blaming and a lack of trust.
When they grow from it, they face it in their own way (could be by telling a friend or by going to therapy, by reporting it etc) and then they let it go. These ones have relationships that aren't effected by what they went through before/during/after the rape.

If your question has nothing to do with her emotional stability and it's because of possible damage to her body, or it grosses you out for whatever reason then you should look up how a doctor is able to tell if rape occured and then learn if those signs of rape cause damage and how much.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

The fact that a girl was sexually assaulted would never disqualify her from consideration by me.

Berethor · Answer

Defiled forever trope, I rather not, she likely messed up that point, I don't need that baggage.

SnowedIn · Answer

Of course. Nothing bad about her because of that.

mrmonogamous · Answer

I’m already been married for 34 years so I don’t count with the youngsters. But to answer the question, she is a SURVIVOR. That is something that requires strength. If I was younger and me a woman who had been raped, it would not be a dealbreaker.

Sevenpointfive · Answer

yes, i would never touch one

exitseven · Answer

I sort of met one I would have no issue at all about dating her

bowenw · Answer

Yes and yes.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Sure... the fact she was raped doesn't make her any less of a desirable woman.

Dingsbums · Answer

I wouldn’t discriminate based on that. I only talked to girls online who said that they were raped before. That topic never came up with someone I know in person

Googlemyahoo · Answer

Dated a girl who told me she was raped twice on separate occasions & the second time was gang raped. Her story didn’t line up nor did she press any charges. I continued to seek explanation when I suspect she wanted just condolences and sad face but my inner bullshit detector was going full tilt.

I kept probing until she finally admitted it was her other job. You see she worked at a 7-11 where I met her & we went out a few times & she kept talking about her other job.

She was an escort

soe11 · Answer

Why not? Tell me

Luopio27 · Answer

Why should a girl be rejected over past horrors of rape that wasn't her fault?

AndrésC64 · Answer

Yes to both

Havthrills · Answer

Yes and yes.

Sparkie460 · Answer

If we had a connection, yes I'd marry her. No I don't know anyone who was raped

lucas262 · Answer

Depends on how traumatized she is. If she takes responsibility for her mental health I don't see why not.

omnivert · Answer

This shouldn't be a question, but an order.

BJP21 · Answer

It really depends on how emotionally compromised they are. Being a raped doesn't always mean undatable.

Twalli · Answer

Probably. I think my sister is marriagable, not for me but for someone, she's been raped at least 4 times. She has a lot of therapy, but isn't terrified of sex.

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