Why are so many girls such whores these days going around and spreading their legs for tons of guys?

I don't understand why it's so hard for so many girls to have some self respect. Most of the girls I know have multiple sexual partners at once which is so disgusting. They are willing to accent a friends with benefits title which is actually kinda insulting because it's like the guy is saying "I'll screw you because you're an easy piece of ass but take you home to meet my mother? Introduce you to people who are important to me? Take my time and money to get to know you then give you the title of being my girl? No." In my eyes, a guy who will have you as a friend with benefits is basically saying you're a sex object; nothing more, nothing less. Yet because some girls have no self control, they don't mind that at all! what the hell! Then some of them are actually dumb enough to sincerely say "Welll I'm using him too so it's okay" No, it's not okay. Then it's like they're actually proud of their slutty behavior like it's some badge of honor that they have sexual experience. When in reality, it makes them look like used goods. It's nasty for a girl to have had so many penises in her mouth or to have had a lot of guy's come and penises in her. I'm sorry but that just seems like a vagina would be dirty and smelly after that. A key that can open many locks is a master key but a lock that can be opened by many keys is just a sh*tty lock.

I just don't understand how a female can have such lack of proper respect for her body. Sex is viewed as recreational activity these days! It's ridiculous. I just don't get it, someone please understand. It's also really frustrating when girls like this try to get girls like me who do not want to give my body to any guy unless he really cares about me and has given me the title, to whore around with them. Why do they do that? Girls, if you're like this please explain why. Guys, what do you honestly think of girls like this? It seems like you like them because hey, they'll give you all the orgasms you want but at the end of the day I've heard a lot of guys are not cool with that. I dated a really hot guy who was really bothered by the fact that his girlfriend had slept with five other guys.

*accept a friends with benefits title, sorry
it's important to me because I feel like sluts ruin good guys and turn them into players, shrinking the population of satisfying men out there and increasing the number of pigs. Then good girls like me have to deal with the scraps :( <------ the entire motivation for this question.
I feel that whores keep the cycle of selfish people who have passion misplacement growing. That cycle effects people who have more to offer than whores and players and us good people get cheated out of something. Whores and players do what I like to call 'a robbery'. They take away a person's passion, spark, and ungaurded self; things that some people never seem to get back. Not only do they suffer, but people who actually would have deserved them and ENHACNED them suffer as well.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Your a rare breed, I only wish more girls had your vision and mentality, because your right, girls are being used, left right and centre, but they don't believe it, and they think its cool to only have a friend if she sleeps with him, otherwise the bloke wouldn't want to know her, so by a girl doing this, not only is she showing other men how easy she is, but the reputation she gets, is going to stick with her as she gets older, and guys will remember, that she had yoyo knickers and a buttery crotch and dirty oven. Not something a girl wants when she is 25 plus, because that's when she will be seriously thinking of settling down, but what will she have to offer? nothing, she would of shagged all her talents away, so any nice guy worthy, won't want to touch her with their mates penis, let alone his own, so I admire your vision, a lot of girls have a lot to do to come close to being close to your mental attitude, you have talent, and that won't go unnoticed, good luck,x

    • that's what I've been trying to say! I am around a sh*t load of guys ALL THE DAMN TIME! More guys than any girl should ever be around! As if I don't already have enough male cousins, but they seem to think they're my damn brothers and like to be in my house A LOT and bring their male friends then before you know it, there's a sh*t load of guys surrounding me D: including all of my male friends too. I know so many guys who express the things you just said. It's like girls wanna get so

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    • wow, that's insightful

    • Thank god this post was created 4 years ago, things have changed. Feminism is gone and women's right are controlled by the government instead of a construct. I've seen men holding hands with their woman as relationships are starting to "glow".

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What Guys Said 19

  • Basically, its grown out of a few trends

    1) shortage of men in certain environments which really destabilizes the dating 'world '. Specifically, inner city areas where a significant portion of young men are in jail, university campuses, especially liberal arts schools where there is a serious female-male ratio difference, and even in some urban areas. Big urban areas actually have more women then men, and those women tend to be pursuing a subset of men with 'good' jobs. Anytime more women are pursuing fewer men, monogamy starts fading. If you have 8 women and 6 men, the two least desirable women don't sit home being sad, they sleep with other girl's boyfriend. And that girl then figures if she's just sleeping with some guy, she might as well sleep with the 'best' guy. And the more that continues, the more the most sought after guys start being totally uninterested in relationships, which reinforces the whole thing.

    2) female empowerment. Women used to look to men as providers, etc. A lot of guys with weak social skills who may not have been good looking could still have a decent job and be a decent husband by old definitions. As women are more able to take care of themselves, they view men as an enjoyable add on. Fewer men are that much fun, and its likely that many women now would rather have sex and fun with a super fun exciting guy (who is also sleeping with three other women) then have a stable relationship with a boring guy. She doesn't need the stability, so she doesn't _really_ need monogamy. Most guys can only financially support one woman, but if all a woman wants is sex and fun, she can 'share' a guy.

    The long term impact if girls do this during their peak years of attractiveness, then decide they want to flip to monogamy is unclear. The most sought for guys are loathe to embrace monogamy, and when they do, many seem to prefer to pick a girl who has not slept around - and they can do so. Meanwhile, there's a pool of guys who were ignored who are not that excited about settling down with a girl who's had her fun when he's just ready to START having fun - and quite often now has a better income, and in fact can more easily get women then when she was ignoring him.

  • What is the difference between the male and female perspective of friends with benefits?

    You said a friends with benefits for a guy means, "I'll screw you because you're an easy piece of ass but take you home to meet my mother? Introduce you to people who are important to me? Take my time and money to get to know you then give you the title of being my girl? "

    Guess what? It goes both ways. The girl is saying the exact same thing to the man. He's hot, he's a good screw, but he is not husband material.

    Women are not the innocent, reserved and naive people you make them out to be. I have girl friends who feel their mission is to fuck as many guys as possible before they get married. Just like guys add notches to their bedpost, so too do girls.

  • My whole opinion on the sexual reliance of todays teens well im disgusted to the point of where I hate current society hell if I could nuke this shit I would, start the NWO for all I care and the ladies who think its okay omg... I pity you I truly do you're practically a symbol of sexual indoctrination you think your making your own decisions while realistically your getting played harder than a noobie at a blackjack table... You think the guy cares about you... Oh hell I have a bunch of stupid player friends who rip on you whores right after they fuck yah close your legs so you can have meaningful sex for years instead of pointless pleasure until you're viewed as a whore by every decent living man.

  • Well I can see your point , ofc it goes that way for guys too .

    But its people that decide what they want and what not .

    And I don't really think that we actually can change this world , after all it was a rotten piece of sh*t before we were even born .

    And after all we still are the animals we was from the beginning or worst , so the more adaptive will survive .. That's how it goes and probably how it always was on the background .

    So hating among each other does not really change a thing .

    Btw I don't focus on relationships , its like that in everything I see around .. Anyway that's my point of view .

  • Well I lost the will to even search for romance, there's a fundamental problem in that the 'eye candy' guys (who generally are not in the slightest bit intelligent as a rule in the UK) will have four girls on the go at a time. Meanwhile, the shy and retiring types (like me) just get ignored, because we don't let our libido loose once we hit adolescence, nor for that matter do we frequent these parties where these whores have their knickers up and down more times than a lift/elevator. Also they'd think that seeing as we're not beautiful in flesh, we're not beautiful in the mind or the heart.

    Generally speaking you'll mostly get the opinions of guys like myself, who bemoan the decline in any semblance of decency in preference to contracting chlamydia.

    Even some of my female friends ask, "Have you lost your virginity yet?" My response is decidedly polite, "No, what made you think of that if you don't mind me asking?" Response, "It's been eight years today since I lost mine." Me: "Oh that's erm, nice, then." I'm not even twenty yet and these girls who are months younger than I am are just so comfortable in spouting this crap to someone they barely know!

    If it's any consolation, I've not been on a date because these girls are just too interested in getting laid by someone who only wants the one night stand. Me? I'm not too interested in having a burning wizz the morning after, thanks awfully. I'm looking for someone who is similarly of the shy and retiring nature, that way I feel more like I could trust someone, and I wouldn't do anything until I was sure I could trust and love someone and equally that they could trust and love me.

    I must say I quite liked your rant about this, it definitely is something only someone with brains and bravery would type. I echo stubbsy when I say that you have talent and an admirable mental attitude.

    All the best.

  • Totally agree. It's mind boggling how many whores there are. It's sad that most girls degrade themselves to that level, I know plenty of girls that are 16, 17, 18 years old that have banged 20 or more different guys, have had sex close to 100 times, and see nothing wrong with it. that's why I've never had a girlfriend, most girls are only care about how "hot" you are, and if you have a big penis. I want nothing to do with girls like that, and it's harder than ever to find a "good" girl nowadays, and it really is sad.

  • I will only date a virgin... Experienced girls aren't for me

    • why not? I've seen you post on another question that you are a virgin as well...are you intimidated by their experience?

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    • Awww, I definitely think the idea of two virgins together growing on their sexual path is sweet. Yet at the same time, there are a lot of people out there who don't have that gift to share with someone anymore and there's nothing they can do to get it back. But they are still good people who could be correct for me so I don't overlook them. To each is her own I guess

    • Yeah. Keep your head up there's still good guys around :)

  • "Why do they do that?" - Insecurity and a lack of a belief in a better purpose in life.

    "...what do you honestly think of girls like this?" - I feel bad for them and do my best not to get involved (although once or twice in the past, I've fallen victim to lust and my own weaknesses).

    "It seems like you like them because hey, they'll give you all the orgasms you want but at the end of the day I've heard a lot of guys are not cool with that." - I'm very cool with it when I'm on the winning end of it, but I never respect it and would never get serious with a girl who uses her body and sexuality as a bargaining chip.

  • You only live once right? I heard that motto from a few girls.

  • There is nothing wrong with girls having sex with multiple guys or guys having sex with multiple girls. Everyone should be free to do whatever it is they want. If a person simply wants to have sex with multiple people without getting into a long term relationship, then that's what they should do.

    Promiscuous people isn't a problem in today's society. But a big problem is judgmental people like you who try to force their opinions onto others.

  • The woman asking the question has found the answer, in my opinion, in her question: 'How can girls show such disrespect for their own bodies?' Exactly correct. When I was growing up, there were two kinds of girls--guy friends would tell you--the girls you want to f*ck and the girls you want to marry. It's all about self-respect.

    Women ought to know three very important things about guys, which will be true forever: One, guys don't respect girls that sleep around and brag about it--no matter what he says or how he acts, and no matter how attractive the girl is; Two, guys only truly fall in love once or twice in their lifetimes, and mostly not at all because they may never run into a woman who has all the things he is looking for--if he is truly in love, he seems like a new man; Three, sex does not affect men very much emotionally--unless, as I say, he is actually in love.

    Girls who waste their 20s spreading their legs because feminism says that females should be sexual 'any time and any place' are passing up the real men who would make good husbands and instead 'dating' bad boys or sugar daddies who will never commit to a relationship because they can just move to the next younger, prettier girl when the one he is currently f*cking is used up--sad, but true.

    Many poor, hardworking 'losers' in their 20s will become alpha males and bad boys in their 30s with the power of a job and resources. And who will they 'date' if they did the hard work to know themselves and life? Certainly not the less attractive, angry, and demanding women who are in their 30s (tick-tok). No, it will be the more attractive 20-something girls who will 'sexually express' themselves for nothing more than a nice evening out--money for honey.

    No amount of sitting around the living room drinking Chardonnay, being angry at men, and lying to each other about how 'being slutty is our right', 'looks shouldn't matter' and 'men should be our slaves to make up for past oppression' will change the above facts. When these women get to 35 and up, they are miserable and unattractive drunks--no matter how much 'power' they have at the 'office'. I have seen this many, many times...

    Cheers and good luck.

  • As a guy I think you are right on the money how the plethora of sluts has a major impact on our psych.

    Why would we work hard for someone with self respect, if all we got to do is stay in shape and wear nice cloths and the masses will put out just because of sexual attraction?

    When you get older you want a girl with self respect, but as a young man we dont want to commit for like 6-10 more years and like I said the girls are just GIVING IT AWAY!!!

    So yes you are absolutely right, this adulterous and perverse generation is making you "pick up the scraps". Back in the day it was totally uncool to be a slut which means the "good girls" got to pick from the cream of the crop.

    Now its cool to be a slut so that means bad girls get to pick from the cream of the crop and good girls get scraps.

    Some feminists will call me sexist, claiming why is it okay for men to be whores but not women? You also hit the nail on the head with that one, a key that opens many locks is a master key, a lock that is opened by many keys is a shitty lock.

    Men and women are different as much as feminists would hate to admit. Women are supposed to be the gatekeepers of sex, and the man is supposed to be the suitor. Men are supposed to have to bend over backwards and be a complete gentlemen. Like I said today all you have to do is stay in shape and wear nice cloths to get into womens pants. This generation is completely adulterous.

    Men are not to blame for this. Women are the ones who are giving it away for almost nothing but mutual sexual attraction, men are just taking the bait.

    They do wear it as a badge of honor and call you sexist if you call them out.

    If you notice mainstream TV, music and movies all promote having sex with someone based off of nothing but sexual attraction. What came first the chicken or the egg? I think having this media shoved down our throats from day 1 has corrupted our generations. And I think its been socially engineered that way. Break down the family structure and the people will be more dependent on expanding the government. Expanding the government means more power to the 1%

  • Really really love this question asker. Am 19 and fucked 3 bitches. I say that because they weren't real women.. I was just being a drunk high school boy and I'll tell u what I could have had more.. actually had to weed out the "less advanced" whores tht wasn't as dick hungray as the rest because I've always been repulsed by this attitude of it being OK to suck off a guy n fuck Em at the end of a party.. Every weekend.. a lot of these same girls go on to college and party every other night. I had a bitch a really really liked... fucked like 19 guys.. ya.. Junior year. Telling u guys even the most popular girls and seemingly good ones are dick craving loony bins talking about empowerment n shit but get upset when u say there crazy but will go fuck somebody the night you breakup. It's ridiculous. I stopped fuckin wit them completely. Haven't had sec in like 2 years. I am truly discusted at the current state of affairs. Who wants some fat bitch with a short haircut every time you say men and women alike should have decentcy and morals yelling in ur fuckin face talking about equality. What is equality? U have the same rights as me. Not more. Not less. If I think ur a fuckin wacko bitch nut job promoting the misdirection of women into self destructive behavior calling it empowerment I have that right. Fine let them open there legs every hour like they need a cigarette. and ruin thare chances down the road! Fine with me. HOWEVER. This type of behavior is so permissive and mainstream that there are seemingly no decent women left. This asker might be th only one left in the usa

  • One word: feminism.

  • Rant rant rant! I didn't even bother to read this! It's the same sh*t every time!

    If you are ugly - go under the knife!

    But don't tell you WOULDN'T love to look like one of those "leg-spreading sluts"

    • lol so I can see a streched p**** that may have warts on them? no thanks :P Just because I feel this way doesn't automatically mean I'm ugly. I get plenty of male attention lol too bad you'll never know ;) For you to claim that only an ugly girl would feel this way just shows that you're small minded and stupid lol

  • I don't think they shrink the population of "satisfying men" in the long run. When a guy is ready to settle down a girl like you he'll want to do it with. We are not idiots, a few friends with benefits won't turn us into pigs, but until we find the "one" why not enjoy the freebies.

    • Contrary to popular belief of men, yeah you guys kinda are idiots lol I have to wait until men mature and grow up to get a good one. And I hate the idea of a good guy running through a bunch of p**** in order to become a certain type of man that he could have become without screwing a bunch of people THEN wanting a girl like me who has saved myself for him. that's unfair bullsh*t.

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    • 100% agree with the asker here... I will wait and save my virginity until I meet up with my girlfriend... She saved herself for me and vice versa... Kinda like an 1800's couple :d I feel that it makes it all that more special to be able to do something together that you can gaurentee no other testosterone pumped hornball of a guy has done...

    • So well said I can't take it when people ask why I care about how much sex my partner has had It would bother me because now you gotta live knowing that a bunch of other people satisfied your man/woman before you and may have done a better job than you too lol when I think about that I find it revolting.

  • I think the problem is women that sleep around with a lot of guys and that is seperate from women that have fwb. Sleeping with many people is wrong in my opinion. It is not safe and it is just pointless. Having friends with benefits is healthy though. It is the situation where you guys both like each other just not passionately enough to want a serious thing out of it. Maybe she has a great booty and awesome boobs but not my preference in face, maybe I am built like she wants a man to be in the sack but not exactly her type when it comes to other factors. So we can still have physical attraction and have fun. I have had several friend with benefits and it is a simply good sex and not much else.

    • interesting perspective. yet you don't think that's insulting and maybe even a little degrading (not totally though because you didn't say it to her). "You have great t*ts and a nice ass, but you're not all that pretty and I can't see myself seriously being with you so lets just f*** from time to time." Maybe it's just me...but that's like saying she's a sex object and she's only valuable because of what she'll do for you sexually and because of her t*ts or ass. it's disgusting.

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    • Hey I am a realist. I like sex and I know women like sex. I also know that because of our media the most desirable traits are usually a certain face and certain look. I have a very diffrent look from the people around me cause I am not from the UK. I feel I am very biased over the typical white guys. That being said latinos have the lover thing going for them and I guess I would rather fill that gap than be bitter and single all the time. We are all sex objects nowadays.

    • oh no no no, don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to scold you. I appreciate you being real about how you feel. I'm just saying, genuine thoughts like yours support the idea why I think FWB is insulting in a way. No matter what anyone says about FWB, at the end of the day, a guy has decided that he'd rather have you as a piece of ass than a girlfriend. Maybe it's just me, but that would be hurtful. I wouldn't be okay with that. I'd feel dirty and I'd want a brand new vagina after doing that!

  • Although I wouldn't keep a girl as my girlfriend if I knew she had sex with a bunch of guys or was in a one night stand, it's none of my business what kind of sexual past every girl has. Why is this important to you? If you don't approve of these things, you just don't do them.

    • it's important to me because I feel like sluts ruin good guys and turn them into players, shrinking the population of satisfying men out there and increasing the number of pigs. Then good girls like me have to deal with the scraps :(

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    • omg I feel exactly the same!

    • I worry because with the current world trend kids might be indoctrinated into sexual activity at a younger age than preferred my 13 year old brother told me the girls in his class talk of sex even more so amongst the guys... Fuck when I was 13 I was going out on a swing set an chasing my buds around playing manhunt and soccer... anyone wonder WTF is happening e. e

  • No name no shame .


What Girls Said 14

  • I have self-respect, I simply have a different point of view about sex than you do.

    I see sex as a natural thing. It's enjoyable, not dirty or shameful, and I don't see it as necessary to limit sexual activity only to long-term, committed relationships.

    I don't "accept" a friends with benefits title---if I'm in a friends with benefits relationship, it's because that's the type of relationship I *want*. Is it insulting to him if I don't introduce him to my mother? No, it's the type of relationship that both him and I are CHOOSING for ourselves. How is that insulting?

    And for the record, I've never had a friend with benefits who treated me as nothing more than a sex object. They treat me as a friend---and also we have sex with each other.

    I don't see having sex with a person as that person "using" me. To me, sex is a SHARED experience that I've decided to engage in.

    I have self-control as well, but since I view sex differently than you, I don't feel the need to prevent myself from having sex with a person that I want to have sex with.

    "I'm sorry but that just seems like a vagina would be dirty and smelly after that."

    This may come as a surprise to you, but the vast majority of people shower.

    "A key that can open many locks is a master key but a lock that can be opened by many keys is just a sh*tty lock."

    This is a stupid metaphor, but it's especially disgusting coming from a woman. This metaphor condemns women for being sexually promiscuous while simultaneously praising men for the same thing. Why do you so readily accept that double standard?

    Obviously there are a lot of differences between you and I, but I think the most important difference to point out is that you judge other women harshly because they have a different point of view than you, whereas I completely respect a woman if she chooses to reserve sex only for someone she loves, or for marriage, or whatever else she chooses. I believe that a person has the right to their own body, and so long as they aren't hurting anyone, who am I to judge? What other people do in their sexual lives doesn't affect me.

    I'm not a slut, I'm a person---and a pretty nice one at that. And since you're so interested in other people's sex lives, I'll let you know that I engage in safe sex and treat all my partners with respect and dignity and won't settle for any less from them.

    I find it very sad that people feel the need to shame, insult, and stigmatize others like you have in this post.

    • And as others have said, I don't feel proud, nor ashamed. I don't have sex because I don't respect myself nor for attention, I have sex simply because I enjoy it and I want to.

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    • @Faulty

      "No offense walk up to any guy and ask for sex he'll probably say yes if I tried to do that i'de probably get charged for sexual harassment. "

      Asking someone for sex isn't considered sexual harassment under the law, so no, you wouldn't get charged for sexual harassment (unless it was like, at your job, in which case, it's pretty inappropriate to randomly approach your coworkers for sex).

      I don't know anything about you and you don't know anything about me, but even if we assume what you're saying is true, what's your point? It's okay to have sex if it's hard for you to have sex, but it's not okay to have sex if it's easy for you to have sex? If sex comes easily to a person, they're a shit person if they partake in it?

      " girls who think like you... I dont know how to not be rude I can't you're a slut."

      It's actually quite easy---I mean, it's not like anyone was forcing you to call me a slut.

    • @Faulty

      "you think those guys are your friends while they pound your pussy and blow a load all over your teeth huh?"

      Are things like respecting a person, caring about them, enjoying spending time with them, etc. mutually exclusive with having sex with that person?

      "and you can shower but those stretch marks ain't going away."

      What stretch marks are you referring to?

  • This situation usually has nothing to do with having no self respect - actually most the girls who do it are rather confident / arrogant.

    Like look at the women on reality shows like bad girls club or jersey shore if you watch them - if not I'll give you the low down.

    These women are very beautiful, sexy attractive etc - they can pull any guy they want really. Often they go out and have casual sex with men, just for the sake of sex. Is it slutty? Only because their girls.

    The guys of course can go out and have sex with as many girls as they want, and are praised for it.

    So for you stressing the point about girls who go out and have casual sex and calling them sluts, your feeding into that double standard and supporting the idea that women aren't allowed to have free sexual choice as men are. Why not?

    There's a fine line between being a slut, and having an active / healthy sex life.

    Often most people fail to see the difference.

    A slut obviously goes around and has sex with several different men, at different times or the same time - doesn't care who the guy is, just wants the sex.

    A sexually healthy / active female usually sticks with a boyfriend if she has one, may do a FWB with a very close guy friend (maybe, and only with 1 guy,) or maybe have casual sex with a fling she met on a night out. But that aspect is more rare.

    Sexually active / healthy women still have their emotions about them most the time, and would rather have some type of connection with the guy other than sexual. Sluts just want sex, or money / sex, whatever their trying to impulsively gain.

    The main thing your describing here however - actually has nothing to do with sluts or sexually healthy women - actually, women and how we express our sexuality is a smaller expression of how society is changing.

    We've hit an age where two things are happening; 1 - women are becoming more dominative, and 2 - both genders are fighting for this idea of social equality.

    1. Women becoming more dominative.

    Over the history of this country, I'd say modern day is the time in which women have the most rights and freedoms than ever. Women have become profoundly more independent, head strong, and ambitious, compared to our submissive ancestors. Naturally, with this new liberated, strong, independent mindset, women are going to do, what the f*** they want to do - regardless of who doesn't agree. Pussy rules the world, so men can complain and other women can complain, but your breath is honestly wasted, as men will continue to date these women regardless.

    2. Both genders fighting for they idea of social equality.

    Cont in next answer :P ran out of room

    • Woah, I'm loving the long answer! lol Well first off, girls like that are usually not confident. Girls can argue that sex is just purely enjoyable and that's why they want it all the time, but I've never met a promiscuous girl who didn't have issues. Be it daddy issues, self esteem issues, whatever...ISSUES! lol Even when it comes to girls I know, they are beautiful yet surprisingly insecure and I find that tends to be why they go out and have sex. They're either trying to prove to themselves

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    • So the standard is a result of men being unable to get women? That's make sense. It is harder so I guess that makes sense

    • Anothony8x, exactly!

  • You're just asking for trouble.

    But yeah, I've had some casual sex in my time. It has nothing to do with not having self respect. I don't use my sexuality to try and gain respect, or judge a person's quality by what sex they've had.

    When I have sex it's because I enjoy it and because I want it. And the person I'm having sex with feels the same way.

    I don't wear my sexual history as a badge of honour, nor do I feel ashamed of it.

    Yes, I've heard plenty of guys on here saying they wouldn't look twice at someone with a sexual past like mine (which to be honest isn't bad at all) but I've never met a guy like that in real life. Maybe it's a cultural thing, but guys here seem to be okay with the fact that girls have a life before them, just like they did.

    • My completely distant and vague impression is that there's more sort of 'even' level of hooking up going on in the UK. The U.S. is a little more '80% of the women sleeping with 20% of the guys'. That's an exaggeration, but there's some truth in that. Its one thing to say 'he's okay with the fact you had a life before them, just like he did', another for some 'nice guy' near virgin to happily settle down to a quiet life with a girl with a wild past - assuming she even wants too.

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    • won't get respect" - a guys' perspective on FWB

    • Not all girls enter a friends with benefit deal with the hopes of getting something more out of it.

      And again - having sex with someone you don't love doesn't mean you don't have self respect; it doesn't to me anyway.

  • I just think all girls are different and they have different beliefs and morals. A girl that has had over 70 partners like one girl on here that posted a question is pretty sick. I don't think that these girls don't have respect for themselves though but just want to have fun and enjoy their life. The truth is that most guys don't have respect for girls that do that but they do it themselves so f*** them. If a guy wants to mess around and have fun then he should be with someone like himself. There are guys that have their fun and then marry a virgin which is wrong. Promiscuous girls do make it very easy for guys to cheat and I don't respect home wrecker's. I'm not into fwb's and take sex very seriously but I don't judge girls that do it as long as they don't mess with guys that are taken. I also think that your question should be addressed to both guys and girls. Everybody should have a certain amount of respect for themselves regardless of their sex.

    • I completely agree with Amillia! Both guys and girls have that responsibility and its fair enough when its likeminded people fooling around with each other. I respect the act of sex and feel its something done between 2 that love each other. Not just when. A guy wants to use a girl, cos A LOT of guys think like that! All my friends sleep around even thought they have wives/ GF's. And in a lot of those instances, the girl helping the guy cheat, knows full well that he is taken!

  • Hmm, I don't think its necessarily a lack of self respect, I actually think a ot of women noawdays are just more open and willing to admit that they also want casual sex without necessarily having commitment sometimes...and I don;t think there's anything wrong with that as long ad they're responsible and safe about it...and don't tell eveytne about it!

    • thank you for sharing your opinion :)

  • 2. Fighting for social equality cont

    Okay, so I'm sure you've noticed all the dudes complaining about " gender roles -" as in the guys always having to


    Pay for dates

    Be chivalrous etc -

    Well, guys feel it is unequal and unfair that only men are expected to do those things - so that societal norm is in flux.

    What that means is now women are being actively encouraged to approach men, pay half way or totally pay for a date or two, be as sweetly gestured as men etc -

    Likewise, women are complaining about gender roles such as:

    Women have to be innocent / pure - are not allowed to be as aggressive sexually as men, or demonstrate a need for sex.

    Women have to be submissive to men.

    Women have to be the primary care givers for family etc - not able to pursue a career as guys do.

    These ideas are in flux as well. Which means, women are being more sexually free, more dominant / head strong in fields of life, and pursuing careers and goals to the fullest - taking advantage of the rights that we use to not have a little while ago ultimately.

    What I don't understand is why dudes are screaming for equality for the genders, but then turn around and complain about the idea when women try to get our equality as well?

    It's like, men can throw away their societal created gender roles and be fine - but once women try to support and follow through the SAME idea - it's suddenly a huge problem for society.

    But that's to be expected - the world is still pretty much male dominated (for now,) so naturally that power and authority would create a favor of rights / advantages for the males :\


    So yea, what your describing has a lot more to do with the rapid changing going on in society - our generation just happens to be the one born right in the middle of such a flux, and supporting them.

    Women and sex have always been something society has desperately wanted to control - because face it, no one wants to recognize that a woman who knows her sex and how to use it, is beautiful, has a lot of damn power, and is pretty threatening for the dominative male complex.

    We we're beaten for just looking at other guys, beaten by our husbands, spat on, stoned to death, raped, forced into submission, sexually imprisoned -

    That's really the life people want for us women? Slaves to our sexuality because men don't agree?

    But I thought guys wanted equality? Is not having women be as liberated as guys not equality?

    And that lock analogy is a poor representation - sure a lock that can be opened by several is bad - but a key should only be reserved for a few locks to unlock.

    That analogy is pretty much saying women aren't as valuable - and men are the master keys that have a right to open every treasure they desire.

    • I appreciate the effort put into these answer. It's not too much for me to digest, it just kinda drones on a bit and I'm too tired to do all that reading right now. I feel like I'm reading a long ass article from Cosmopolitain

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    • Oh I definitely don't think you are one of those self righteous virgins - your just bothered by the f***ed up sexual reality of modern day society - I'm the same. I don't understand why society has changed in such a way either.

    • The amount of sex thats had today is ridiculous especially amongst teens which is where I'm truly bothered rewind 50 years that shit would get you beat girls possibly disowned

  • I think a better question is why are girls so judgmental and hard on one another? Who are you to judge someone else for their life choices. Mind your own business, and don't try and thrust your traditionalist ideals upon others.

    So long as a girl (or guy) is being safe and doing it for their enjoyment - go for it. I don't care anyway. If it doesn't affect me, it's not my problem nor business. I agree with Heatherlu, I've had casual sex and it's not for attention, validation or a "badge of honour". It's because I enjoy it and am comfortable with the people I choose to do it with. I'm not proud, nor embarrassed. I'm neutral. I don't see it as having no respect for my body, I'm just indulging it.

    • There's an economics answer to that one (why are girls judgemental).

      Girls who have casual sex lower the cartel price on sex (which was formerly 'you must be in a relationship' and before that 'you must be married')

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    • yeah, you're right. I definitely shouldn't be blaming it on girls who have sex as if it's their fault and they're responsible for the actions of a grown man!

    • Precisely. Whilst I do think some women give others a 'bad reputation' and all that, I think that people who BELIEVE those reputations apply to everyone are being silly. If a guy is disrespecting a woman, it's his fault and up to her as to whether she allows it. But if it's a mutual, consenting relationship - I don't see the problem. Anywho, enjoy!

  • I hate that people always assume if a girl isn't having sex with a guy she's serious with, "she's being used" whenever she has sex with someone. Some of us like having casual sex because as enjoy it, and as long as we use protection and know what were getting into there is nothing wrong with that! I love friends with benefits and I don't feel like I'm being "used" because I wouldn't want the guy to meet my parents or anything! Sex CAN be recreation and that's the reality for some, girls who like the sleep with more than one guy don't "ruin" romance, if a guy is truly "pure" and only sleeps with people he loves no "slut" is going to change that

    • wow, you're so sleazy. good luck being viewed as wife material with an attitude like that!

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    • lol, I'm really not getting pissed. And didn't you practically just repeat that entire paragraph? Look, if you want to go whore around and get your vagina loose and stretched before you've even reached adulthood, by all means; GO AHEAD! I really don't care :) I'm getting tired of all your lame b*tching and whining, trying to start sh*t. Get a life!

    • I have now posted a lot on this thread... And honestly sex shouldn't be recreational it is and always was ment to be a romantic thing shared between someone you love not some god damn friends with benefits bull shit that term is disgusting filthy makes me sick anyone I mean anyone because I am very close minded on this subject ANYONE who has friends with benefits guy or girl I typically shun consider them a whore slut skank idc man hoe girls nowadays are so easy and stupid... thinking guys are your friends while realistically they just wanna beat your pussy.

  • Lol I understand what you mean by "ruin the good guys"

    My boyfriend had all his prev gfs give him everything

    without asking f it

    When he got to me it was like a complete shock to him :/

    • yes! the way I went about phrasing that was kinda bitchy and mean, but I'n glad someone here knows what I meant!

  • I'm not one for relationships I like casual no strings attached sex! Men do the same and get away with it but if a girl does it she is a whore?! Meassuring with double standards ain't it?

    ur just prude or something

  • i agree with ya girls today sometimes can be over horny juzt to see a penis

  • I am a girl like you, I mean I can't have sex without being truly in love with a guy so I just had one sex partner...

    I do think its insane how girls can suck so many guys, much more than intercourse actually ...

    HOWEVER it's not fair only guys be slutty and sleep around, girls can do it to if they feel like it...

    In my opinion people whether a guy or a girl should be more involved to have sex...

    but you can't judge the girls and not the guys...its not fair I admire somehow this girls that make guys as objects...

    why is the reason they do it, just for pleasure...

  • I think that promiscuous people really have ruined romance. Yes guys can be promiscuous too but I'm more disappointed in the girls who are. Why? Women release the hormone Oxytocin whenever they have intercourse, which is the same hormone that's released during breastfeeding to bond the mother to her baby. It's disgusting to think that there are girls out there that would want to share such a deep and intimate bonding experience with a random guy or a fwb. I don't understand how any woman can think that's okay (unless they never want to settle down at some point). A lot of women are claiming it's a double standard if guys can sleep around and not be as harshly judged as girls who sleep around, but males and females don't have the same physiology. So if there is indeed a double standard present, it is one that's created by nature.

    • Wow, this answer is so enlightening :)

  • Not all FWB are like hooker clients who just walk through the door for five minutes and then just leave. I've FWB's myself, though because I'm bisexual the guys know they're not going to elevate to boyfriend or husband status with me. Though there are guys who are okay with that, it does complicate things which I don't want to go through with at this time. And the trouble with bf's is that they sometimes start to take you for granted, for all lack of competition, and just "screw you" because they don't have to do more than that. So you start to feel used like with the FWB status you mention earlier in your topic, where guys just have sex with you.

    • Even though I'm harsh when I'm trying to get my point across doesn't mean I lack compassion :( I'm really sorry you've felt used. I have insight into FWB because of my close male friends and male cousins! I've seen how my female friends view FWB and may think it's just casual sex then heard my male friends and male cousins talk about those girls like dogs to their friends or make the worse facial expressions when someone asks if that's their girlfriend. I've seen what it's like when a girl...

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    • I'm sorry I accidentally pressed the report button. I'm typing on my iPod. I hope it's okay

    • I'm sorry, I accidently hit the block button on you kayla. I'm typing on 'block that bitch' keyboard.

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