What does it mean if a guy asks you out for drinks rather than dinner?

Does that necessarily mean that he's just interested in sex? Or is it more like it's not even really a date so just chose something where the two of you don't have to spend hours together and he can leave after just one drink? I assume the very fact that he asked the girl to go out at all means that he doesn't find her totally replusive.
Updates:
more specifically, he asked if I wanted to go for drinks. When I asked if he knew any good restaurants, he said no but he knows some good bars.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I actually believe that when men (or women, because I've done it too) ask someone out for drinks it is mainly because:

    1. they don't know you well & they don't want to commit to spending a lot of time with you in case you two don't get along well. (i.e., boring, no spark, crazy, etc.)

    2. meeting for drinks is kind of like a pre-date "interview"...do I want to date this person?

    3. I don't want to spend money on this person yet, not until I know that I like them better.

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    • Too feel more comfortable, you should suggest going to a nice restaurant bar. Not a "bar-bar." You find a couple that you are comfortable with, then you will feel better about it. And stick to only 2 drinks.

    • Thanks for B.A.

      Good luck on your search for "the one."

    • I totally agree with you! 😊

  • I have heard the general rule that it's a booty call only if he asks to meet you at 11pm or later. So if you're meeting for drinks and you want to be more than a booty call but he suggests 11pm, suggest an earlier time and just get out of there before he tries to take you back to his place.

    Asking you to go for drinks is a perfectly suitable way to ask you out because he simply wants to get to know you and wants to keep it light and casual. Dinner is a bit more "serious" than drinks, and I can almost guarantee that if after going for drinks he wants to see you again, he'll ask you to dinner.

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    • hmm it's for around 8pm so I guess it's not too too bad ... but really is it so casual that it's not even really a date? More just like hanging out though? lol I can't believe at this age I'm still getting fussed about these minor details but there we have it :)

    • Show All
    • Its a date. Drinks is standard for a first date, at least in my demographic.

    • My 2 cents honestly I think calling it hanging out is just a way to take pressure of things. It's still a date just something more relaxed and low pressure. Dinner for a first date seems a bit too formal for me but then again that may just be my age.

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What Guys Said 13

  • This is a very original question...five-star rating for you. :)

    ---------------

    I don't think the "drinks" vs "dinner" date is a "f*ck buddy" vs "serious girl"...

    ...

    ...it's more imo of a "casual date" vs "formal date".

    He may think that a dinner date is too formal/serious and not as light-heared/fun.

    Believe it or not...he may be worried about scaring YOU off by a formal dinner date. :)

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    • do you think it's actually more because he wants it to be clear that it's not even a date but just the two of you hanging out though?

  • good god, stop over-thinking it!

    Just worry about how you're gonna knock his ass over with your bomb ass self and MAKE HIM take you out on a legit first date. Drinks are to see if you're even worth spending 100 bucks on. I won't take a girl out unless I know she's worth every penny. B**ches will be using guys for free food and company SMH

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  • It's pretty common these days to just meet for a few drinks and see where it goes from there. A lot less pressure and people can just get to know each other instead of doing a bunch of random stuff together. Plus, women are so damn flaky that what guy even wants to plan a whole evening when so many women flake on us.

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  • Its a mini date.

    If he's asking you for drinks before last call, he might be angling for sex. If you are meeting for drinks after work, that suggests getting to know each other and seeing if you want a longer date.

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  • Lol, you believe you can guess his intentions based on where the first date is... Dinner on a first date for me is too much. Let's see if we can hold each other's interest for 5 minutes first.

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  • Some people just don't enjoy going to dinner as a date. I personally hate it. Asking someone to dinner would be a last resort for me, id always choose drinks, particularly if its early days. I don't think it reflects intention at all.

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  • some folks are more at easy having just drinks for a first date rather than going for a meal

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  • It means he's to cheap to buy dinner he juat wants to throw a few shots in ya on an empty stomach

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  • Maybe he's an alcoholic.

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  • Sex probably

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  • It's just whatever you happen to feel like doing or think they would be interested in at the time.

    Drinks are more flexible/practical in general. It's often cheaper, it's faster, easier to plan, easier to alter. It's more freeform.

    Personally I would only ask to do dinner if it meant we were doing it at home. Not doing restaurants.

    Also, all that stuff I saw about what different time's mean as well, that's all bull. None of it means anything. It would be paradoxical if it did.

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  • He might be an alcoholic living on a liquid diet if he knows lots of bars but not restaurants. It doesn't mean he only wants sex but it is a tip off that he is into drinking so just know from the start if things get serious that you are getting into a relationship with an alcoholic and years down the road you can't get mad that he drinks or it'll be a deal breaker for him.

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  • It's quite possible he knows he'd be more relaxed around you if he has a couple drinks in him. Some guys still need that bottle of nerve so don't read too much into it as it could be something as simple as that.

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What Girls Said 10

  • I thinks drinks is better than dinner coz its a little more casual n dinner is formal for just getting to know someone to me. You're sure you want more with dinner should be like the 4th date or something. But that's coz I like casual dates like picnics, workout session or coffee (Tea) even though I don't drink it lol but u you get the gist

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  • Don't overthink it, see how it goes and have fun
    To your question drinks are a good way to get to know each other and if both have a good time you can go to dinner or movie afterwards but if not like you said you can just leave

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    • You can also just leave and still had a great time in the bar, it's just enjoyable to drink something together, don't have to he alcohol

  • He doesn't or May Not want to Spend the Money, honey, In case the Night itself, Such as Chemistry even, Didn't Work Out when you Both went Out. xxoo

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    • Yes, in some case sex but hopefully you will know from the Start what is in his Heart when you Accept the date. xx

  • A cheapskate player who is unwilling to invest in getting to know you. This type of guy is hoping to get you drunk then have sex and then ghost you after, steer clear !!

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  • He gets nervous on dates so thinks going out for drinks will brake the ice or he just wants to fuck.

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  • Might be trying to get you drunk so you'll go home with him

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  • He's not hungry he's thirsty😂

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  • I wouldn't want to eat on the first date

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  • He might have just wanted a drink lol

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  • I would think he wants to get to know you first. Drinks are easier with someone you don’t know very well. I do think drinks are more casual and less pressure right off the bat.

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