Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Is it okay to sleep with my friends with benefits when seeing someone?

I am seeing someone and I really like him but I don't know how serious he is about me. We met four months ago and haven't had sex yet but we have done things together and he's so sweet and always saying that he wishes he could see me more and take me out places. But I have a friends with benefits and we always said until one of us is in a relationship we could sleep together and so I'm really conflicted. My desire to sleep with him is less and the last few times I've slept with my friends with benefits I've been thinking about the other guy and felt pretty guilty while doing it. I really don't want to hurt the other guy. Am I in the wrong? Does it make me a bad person? I feel bad having sex with someone else when I'm seeing someone but we aren't exclusive yet so I don't know the "rules". I'm scared that if I stop seeing my friends with benefits then it will jinx everything and the other guy won't want to see me any more, but it I carry on it will ruin things between me and a guy I actually care about and a potential relationship. I've never had a boyfriend and I'm scared of getting hurt so I just don't know what to do. All opinions and answers would be helpful :)
Updates:
+1 y
Decided I'm not going to see my FWB for now, I don't wanna mess things up. Thanks for your answers
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • Four months of dating and no sex yet? What's going on here?

    I think it's long enough that a lot of feelings can develop and you could hurt him badly if he finds out you were f***ing someone else all this time. Not only you guys never had sex together but you haven't even talked about what each of you want?

    Girl, it's time to get your act together with that guy. If you like him you better start acting the part and try to get farther with him. This lengthy in-between situation is a disaster waiting to happen.

  • The reason for having a friends with benefits is because you don't want(/have) a boyfriend ;)

    sounds like you like this guy, obviously break it off with the fwb... its not like there is a lack of guys who like sex with no strings attached if it wouldn't work out.

Most Helpful Girls

  • The guy that you're seeing dosn't know that you're in bed with someone else. How do you think he might feel if he were to be aware of that? Pretty bad I think so. It's for the best to stop sleeping with your friend with benefits if you're going to be seeing someone else.

  • Put yourself in his shoes. If you were him and he were you how would you feel if you found out? If the answer isn't "like I'm on top of the world, amazing, incredible, I love him all the more" then you're probably doing something wrong.

  • Yes you could and that's good idea that you going to stop seeing your FWB.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

If you had the power to snap your fingers and make something happen instantly what would it be?
In middle east and Asian culture incest marriage between cousins is seen normal, is that normal?
Do men like being woken up with a blowjob in the morning?
HERPES! Did I do the right thing?

What Girls & Guys Said

0 3

  • Ditch the new guy and go back to your friend with benefits...leave that poor bastard you are dating alone! Dude deserves better.

    • I agree here, that's completely messed up! and here is another truth: If you said " lets have an open relationship" that means you are having an open relationship, and he is in a commited one.

    • Well I actually stopped seeing him for a while, so I went back to my FWB because he started seeing another girl. But then we started again, I haven't slept with any one else since then I was just asking because I wanted to know what to do since I'm supposed to be seeing my FWB tonight. But I've decided I'm just gonna tell him straight and tell him that until I know exactly what's going on that I'm not gonna do anything that might mess this thing up, because I actually care about the guy.

  • If you found out the other guy (boyfriend material) has been sleeping with a friend with benefits of his own while dating you, and you'd honestly feel "that's totally fine", then you also should feel free.

    If your answer is "no that's not fine", then you should stop sleeping also. This has nothing to do with how you'd find out for sure or if he's even got a FWB and doing it at all. The point of this is more of a guide.

  • All I can say is that I truly have sympathy for the poor, unsuspecting dude who's dating you.

Latest Questions

Is sex seen as the pinnacle of value in our society?
Why are men sexually insatiable?
Guys do you think your smooth when you look at our boobs? And girls how often do you see guys looking at your boobs?
Did I sleep with too many guys?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > Is it okay to sleep with my friends with benefits when seeing someone?