Why do men use women for sex?

[Anonymous]

Ive had sex with guys that I like after just a few dates because I was worried that if I didn't they would move on to someone who would put out, they left me anyway as soon as they got what they wanted, sometimes they came back for seconds =/ (I don't allow them to do this to me anymore). Its happened to my friend too but to make us feel better she says they didn't use us, we used them. I don't see how that's true when the guys are the ones having the orgasm and were not, most women can't orgasm at all from intercourse and most guys aren't gonna go down on just anyone.

[MrOracle]

Why do men use women for sex?

A: Because women let them.

So, the better question is, why do women let them? The simple, nearly fool-proof way to avoid this happening to you is to:

- not have sex unless you're in a committed relationship FIRST, and let guys know that up-front, and

- make them wait a little while for it even then.

The vast majority of guys who are just looking for sex will move on, just like you said. And THAT'S THE POINT: you are trying to filter out the bulk of the guys who approach you and only deal with the few that are serious.

And that get's us back to the question I asked earlier: why do girls LET guys use them for sex? And the answer is: because the girl isn't willing to walk away from a guy she likes, even when she knows he doesn't really like her back, and hopes she can change his mind if she puts out. But that NEVER, EVER works. And she knows that, but she lies to herself and tells herself that maybe SHE will be the exception. Nope, won't happen.

If you don't want to be used, you have to learn to stand up for yourself and be willing to let even the hottest, most attractive guys go if they aren't willing to commit to you. If you don't do that, then it's YOUR fault that you are LETTING guys use you for sex.

[dudeman]

and now just after one sexual partner her chances of forming a lasting marriage fall by fifty nine percent and after five her chamces of forming a lasting ,arrige is now under thirty percent

[MrOracle]

Oh, please.

[dudeman]

its true the cdc released the study in 2003 it was a survey.or ten thousand women at random its pretty solid if you as me and those numbers may be understated seeing how marriage has fallen by twenty percent in the last fifteen years

[MrOracle]

Correlation does not imply causation; that's a logical fallacy. What you describe is much more a symptom than a cause. I already understand the real, root-cause reasons, and this ain't it.

[originalmountaindew]

Excellent answer!

[dudeman]

because women allow it women are the gatekeepers that's why men don't lile sluts they are sh*tty gate keepers

[Asker]

I agree

[dudeman]

yeah I honestly won't go down on a girl if she's had sex with other men it kinda grosses me out so you're right on that

[dudeman]

So what are you going to tell your husband when he finds out you made him wait longer then men that used you.

[Asker]

that I expect more from him

[dudeman]

what makes you worth more why does he not get the.same treatment

[Asker]

I expect my future husband to wait a little longer for sex because that's how ill be able to find out if he's serious about me. I'm not just going to sleep with someone so fast because obviously it hasn't worked for me in the past.

[dudeman]

yes I know that but when he gets upset about it and he most likey wil. he's going to see it as that you desiered them more and him less, I'm just preparing you for the reality of the situation.

[dudeman]

Like it was guys you slept with fast not like just one, one is a mistake multiple is a life style

[Kattrain]

It's not anyone's fault but the manipulater that someone got used for sex. In a perfect world, you would be able to TRUST that people were going to be HONEST about how they FEEL.

I don't want to hear this sh*t about 'gate keepers' or 'it's the girl's fault'. They put trust into people who betrayed that trust. Some goes with girls who use men for money. Neither instance EXCUSES the other, that's THE most ridiculous thing I have heard.

The solution is to become jaded and perpetuate the stereotypes. Perhaps invest in a Chasity belt that unlocks three months into a relationship.

Unfortunately, the jaded pert is almost necessary.

The annoying use of caps is because I'm passionate. Sorry, but not really.

[MrOracle]

You are so wrong and you are perpetuating the victim mentality and saying it's okay for girls to not be responsible for their own behavior. These girls are CHOOSING to have sex with guys they aren't in a relationship with, when they know a relationship is what they want. They are the ones who are lying to themselves.

[Kattrain]

The only exception is if a guy makes no promises, never says he's looking for a relationship, or makes it clear he only wants sex. Otherwise, I stand by what I said 100%.

[Simple-Simonette]

I'm glad that you no longer have sex with men because you're afraid of losing them. You should only have sex with you are ready to, not because you want to gain something from it - like a relationship. That lacks sincerity and reeks of desperation.

As for why men do it - I would ask why not? If you're offering something that they want, they why wouldn't they take it? You show others how to respect you by respecting yourself. And having sex to get something is disrespectful to yourself.

If a guy stops dating you because you want to take it slow sexually, then he isn't the guy for you, despite how much you want him to be. You're better off without someone like that.

Good luck.

[peace-love-couture]

Girls who lay on their backs for a guy who they aren't in a loving, committed relationship with are NOT victims. They allow it to happen to themselves

[Asker]

your right

[stubbsy]

if a guy is not willing to give you what you need then don't give him what he wants, its that simple, because your only going to be proving to all the guys you sleep with that your cheap,x

[Asker]

your absolutely right

[northwestree]

Many men use women for sex.

Some women use men for sex. Note the whole Friends With Benefits phenomenon.

Other people prefer deeper relationships.

The same person often does both in different episodes of their lives.

[originalmountaindew]

Great answer as well!

[djbreal87]

Well, there are men out there who really do just manipulate women for sex, but at the same time, there are women out there who manipulate men for sex. You kinda half answered your own question, you admit to "giving in" because you were afraid they would go somewhere else so you are enabling them by doing so. This is a touchy subject, because there are guys who truly don't care, but then again, it takes two to tango. Unless they are raping you (god forbid) its as much your fault as theirs :(

[toouglytobeloved]

why do you let them have sex with you if you don't "really" know them or their intentions

but you ask "Why do men use women for sex"? same reason why girls use men for money ... because they can

but I'm not the player type your describing ... if a girl wanted sex with me (put out etc) than id keep her ... id never leave that would be stupid imo

and if you can't orgasm from sex, why do it?

and my fantasy "dream" is to go down on a girl ... id have so much fun doing that ... but anyways

your just insecure and its the same problem with a lot of girls on this site

[beastman88]

same reason everybody wants to have sex, to cum, duh

[TheTruthYoullGet]

Why Doesn't Women Stay With Man That Want Her For Sex.

[Asker]

because he doesn't want to stay