Should a guy take you out?

Should a guy take you out even if it's just a friends with benefits situation. It doesn't have to be a date, but just go out together from time to time. Drinks, movie, to eat, or a walk. I would pay for myself it that is the problem. But there has been a lot of tension between myself and my fwb. He keeps asking what he is doing wrong, I give him different reasons that are also problems, but I just can't bring myself to bring this one up. This is actually my main problem with him. Even when hooking up he never offers me anything even to drink. He gets himself a drink or something to eat and he would say "here try one" and that's it. I want to get out of this situation so badly. I'm always ending it and restarting it again because I am so lonely. With school and work it's nice to have one person can focus on and shows some kind of interest in you. I have friends but they all have boyfriends. I just got out of a relationship not too long ago but I just need some attention. I know this makes me sound so pathetic, but I am a human being and we all need affection. The first time I ended it, I tried volunteering my extra time, and it did take my mind off of him a little but every night I found myself thinking of him. I wouldn't say that I'm in love with him, but my heart is with him. Sad thing is that I do have men coming my way everyday, but they are either those athletes (not judging all) that are not smart, or those guys that party a lot. My friends with benefits is a good mix between smart and social. I wouldn't mind dating him, but he doesn't want to date me. So I just sleep with him just to be close with him. I'm secure in my life generally, but he makes me feel insecure just sleeping with him. I know I deserve better but I physically need a man's warmth and touch, and a friend that truly cares about me. My girl friends are great, but like I's different with a guy. WOW! This totally diverted from my original question. I guess I just needed to get everything out. What do you think, should a guy take you out? Even if it is just an friends with benefits situation?

Let me also add. My friend was also in an FWB and they still hung out outside of sex. They went to dinner together, movies, jogging, and other activities, and they haave sex. Therefore, the situation was not "cheapened". Why is mine different? I have said it once in an arguement and he addressed all of my other points but he ignored THAT ONE POINT. Why do we just stay in his apartment? We never do anything together just as friends.


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What Guys Said 1

  • There is nothing wrong with have FWB as long as it is safe and as long as there is respect between the two of you.

    The key word is "FRIENDS" if a girl just wants to bone and leave then she just wants a booty call.

    I have had a good experience with having a FWB. She is my friend, we call and talk to each other about normal things, and we hang out just like other friends do, but we also had the perk of having sex together.

    It's really just a matter of respect without the emotional attachment of dating exclusively. With those expectations a good FWB is a good experience as long as it is with someone you like as a friend.

    • But shouldn't friend also hang out? Like why be confined to an apartment? Why can't we catch a movie or something? I go with my friends to a movie. So what makes it different since we are just friends? The sex is always there for now, but what would we be when the sex is gone? We don't actually hang out like real friends. We just stay at his place, after sex we talk for a few hours then I leave. That's not friendship to me. That's just sex and talking.

    • I am agreeing with you. ;) You guys should be hanging out and talking like friends do. That is one of the best parts to me.

What Girls Said 1

  • because he only wants the benefits. if he wanted to take you out he'd be dating you.

    sometimes there are feelings between FWB and they go out together. but imo when the guy has no feelings for the girl he probably only wants the sex and doesn't even want to take her out.