Guys, if you get along so well with your FWB, why is it so difficult to make her your girlfriend?

I have a friends with benefits who I am in love with. He basically doesn't want me as a girlfriend and stopped seeing me altogether.

If we get along so well, why not make me a girlfriend?

Months later he started dating a girl. She's smarter than me (engineer) and slightly prettier (I think).

Thanks for the answers. As painful as it is, I still want to understand. We didn't 'agree' to be FWB. We 'dated' then started having sex and had more sex, etc. I tried to get to know all his friends. We have 17 mutual friends on FB (the other girl only has 8).

He came to my birthday party and seems to enjoy the times with me.

That's why I don't understand why he doesn't want me as a girlfriend. Please help.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think for a lot of guy's they just can't respect a FWB situation or the girl who has been in one.

    • So in his head, he already judged me as easy sex so that cannot change even when we have a great time together, I know all his friends and I feed his ego like no other?

    • It my be an issue with him.

    • Hope everything worked out for you (:

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • If you were what he wanted in a serious girlfriend, he would have never allowed a FWB situation to happen with you. He thought you were f***able, he was right. He didn't want anything more then sex from you and he knew that before he had sex with you the first time. Some girls are down to bone no strings attached, others aren't... You're one of those girls.

  • I guess that brutally shows you why you shouldn't accept that type of relationships.

    • @Update : Most young guys never refuse sex. Maybe he didn't have any feeling for you from the start, but used you to overcome his own insecurities regarding sex and to know what women want better. In the future, I would recommend you not to have sex too early in the relationship (wait for the 5-6th date) to bring up the boyfriend/girlfriend question soon after, and to bail out if the guy just wants sex. Because you don't deserve what's happening now. Good luck !

  • Because you are just a friend with benefits. You're just sex. You don't put a person that you want a relationship into that. You're not girlfriend material apparently.


What Girls Said 2

  • He uses dating to find a mate.. a life partner..

    You don't measure up to his wants/needs/standards...

    But you were good enough, and available, for sex.

    • If you want to understand, cut off his sex...

      Force him to talk to you...

  • He doesn't take you seriously. I'm sorry, no offense, if he wanted you as a girlfriend then he wouldn't have rejected you as a girlfriend in the beginning. FWB is saying "I don't want you as a girlfriend. I want you as a wet hole to come in." so girls can't get upset volunteering for that then the guy not wanting to make them something serious.

    Your story is a huge example of why you shouldn't pursue a sexual relationship before you've solidified a mental and emotional one.

    • @ update, there's nothing we can do to help you. We can't make him want you as a girlfriend. I'm sorry, but I think you tarnished your possibility as a girlfriend when you gave him easy sex.

Loading... ;