Will I regret not having more sexual partners?

[DivaPrincess]

My friends tell me more isn't better but I think they are trying to make me feel better. I haven't been with many guys and I wonder if I should have more?

[Anonymous]

Until modern times, except for soon-to collapse developed societies like Rome and today's West, women have been the seat of moral reserve and the root of civilization... to protect them and children. Men have always had wandering eyes (and penises) which, today is an artifact from when it was survival strategy, while women have mostly far more self restrained.
Young women, not men, in modern society, are abandoning their historic roles as wives and mothers in favor of having the same sexual rhythms as men, albeit being concave. Birth control, modern medicine and the discovery that orgasm is actually available to them due to greater technical knowledge about sex and specifically through oral sex has, opened the flood gates of female sexual appetites. In the past, few women had or wanted multiple sexual partners. It is the separation of women from their historic roles that has changed this and it is this disconnect from them that "civilized" society offers that allows it. In the third world sexual partner proliferation in women remains rare and "wrong".
You are wondering if relatively few sexual partners is bad. I say the opposite is true. Men can have multiple partners during their "sporting" years and then become TV Dads raising prudent, protected daughters, while multiple partners deplete a woman's capacity to be faithful wives and mothers and lead to unhappy, dysfunctional lives after they pass out of their carefree youth.

[Opinion Owner]

So, as time passes, it will not be a regret. It will be a relief.

[DivaPrincess]

I sense that in your eyes women should not enjoy sex but be penis receivers. by the way females do not have to learn about self pleasure from modern science. We learn just like men do by touching ourselves. Any man worth knowing will realize oral sex is necessary since penis thrust is not climax worthy unless done right. Your cave man thoughts are quaint at best. Orgasms are for men and women.

[AustinMan]

I have in my hand The Silver Bullet!! Sexual Fantasies!!! Talk about your sexual fantasies with each other. Take on the roles with gusto that you can. If she wants something rougher, talk about it, then meet her in a bar, "pick her up," and take her to your room and give her what she not only wants but very likely "deserves." Have done this many times. It's wonderful. We get to be other people. There are an infinite number of variations you'll discover with practice. Yummy!!

[inquisitiveemt]

More isn't necessarily better, and it doesn't mean that ur going to find the golden goose while attempting to rack up ur number. If u find a void in ur sex life then by all means fill it. If u think u deserve to have sex with who u want until u find ur sexual Prince Charming than do it up! If u have the libido and stamina to knock em down than go for it. The sexual stigma that women should act like women is pure crap. Until there's a man worthy enough to keep untied down (no pun intended) then explore away. Especially if u didn't get to explore ur sexuality when u were in ur late teens through ur 20s.

Best of luck to u Hun. May u have as many men as u can stand.

Luv
Rosie

[DivaPrincess]

Thank you Rosie! You get best answer too!!!

[inquisitiveemt]

Thank u very much diva

[EmeraldSky]

I agree! Especially for females! Seems like the more sexual partners, the more emotional problems!

[Raebies]

I used to wonder the same thing, mostly because I'm in a relationship with the guy I lost my virginity to, and it's natural to want to experience different things, including multiple sex partners. If you aren't in a relationship right now, I would say have casual protected sex if you feel you will regret not doing so in the future. At least get it out of your system before you end up in a serious relationship. I made that mistake myself recently. Now I'm not so curious about having sex with different people, however. Like the anonymous guy said, I think it's the experience that counts, not necessarily the number of people you've had experience with.

[lumos]

You will only regret it if it's truly important to you. But, if you're the kind of person who only has sex with a partner you love, I doubt having many sexual partners is the thing for you. Experience with many different partners honestly doesn't matter much. You're not really missing out on anything spectacular.

[Ildskf]

I think you are the only person that can answer this... from my experience one is all I need... b/c for me sex is more about an emotional bond and there is only one person I want that with. I didn't have any partners until I was 28 b/c I waited to find the one person

[MaskofInsanity]

Personally I don't think number is important at all, it's about the experience. For example, I have had a high number of sexual partners, mainly because I've traveled a lot. I don't regret any of them - I connected with each one and had an amazing time.

Basically, I don't think you'd regret not having had casual sex. You will only be likely to regret holding yourself back and letting loose a bit.

[DivaPrincess]

I have had casual make out sessions but never full on sex. I always wonder what it would be like to have sex freely without regret. I wonder if I am designed for it. I tend to get attached easily.

[characterdeelaa]

How many std's have you caught through the travel?

[MaskofInsanity]

@Asker: I think that if you have doubts, it's probably not for you. And there is no shame in that. @characterdeelaa: none. I practice safe sex.

[ironeddie]

I'm mid 40's and have only had one partner ever. and that ended one hell of a long time ago. LOL!
If there was such a thing as being a born again virgin... It's been so long I would have been born a few times. ;-(

Why do you think more is better? Are you unhappy with the number of guys you've been with?
If you really are. You can fix that easily enough. I don't understand your thinking on this.

:-)

[DivaPrincess]

Not a ton more just more than three. My thinking? Asking others if I will regret my lack of partners?

[ironeddie]

Only you can answer if you do or will regret it. Every body is different. Some want as many partners as they possibly can. Others are quite content with only having one or two in their life time. I mean, I've only had one, and I'd like more. But the opportunity for a relationship or a one nighter, for me, doesn't exist. :-( :-)

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

I think you should screw who you wanna screw and stop giving a fuck about other people's opinions. Its just about what you feel like you wanna do.

[Jager66]

It's not that simple, women who have more partners develop dopamine resistance and this has a huge negative effect on their ability to pair bond. This effect is large and measurable starting at 2 partners. Women are not men and need to start acting like women instead of men.

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

I'm all for sexual freedom. Everyone is different and should do what they want to do regardless of gender

[DivaPrincess]

And your research comes from where? Fox News maybe? What is acting like a woman? Having some barbaric man hop on top of you and thrust his penis for two minutes hop off without caring if the woman is pleased? No thank you...

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Exactly which is why we women always evaluate men before sleeping with them.

[inquisitiveemt]

Seriously jagger66? what exactly do u mean women shouldn't act like men? Why can't we be sexually explicit? Why shouldn't we be able to beat guys at their own game?

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Because we can beat them good

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

Yep you definitely can beat Men in this ''game'' it's not all that hard to be a mildly attractive woman walk into a night club & request a gangbang. Just remember that if you're a 6/10 then a Man who is a 6/10 will not be confident enough to marry you after you best him at this ''game''. It will emasculate him, he will grow to resent you, he will see you more as a fellow Man Competing for a spot in the tribes pride rather than a Woman to mate with & love. You could lie to your future S. O.----

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

----About your promiscuous past & let him believe what he wants to believe after all what he doesn't know won't hurt him & it's not technically lying if he doesn't ask. Just remember that when NOT IF but when he learns about your colorful past he will feel everything I told you earlier & much MUCH more. His resentment will multiply, his emasculation will be quick & noticeable in your love making to where even you will know something is wrong; you can ask him but all he'll say is ''It's Nothing''

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

----All of his love for you will turn into hate he will begin to think that everything you do is nothing more than you mocking him, he will long for the touch/sex of other women & not JUST any type of touch/sex either he'll begin to long for & desire to MAKE-LOVE with other women NOT you but OTHER women. It will ruin your marriage & your life. BUT women who're say 6/10 don't have to worry about just men who're 6/10; depending on how colorful your history is even men who're 7's, 8's, maybe----

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

----Even 9's (but never 10's) will do the same thing as Men in your own level. Those Men will think that you're too much trouble & carry too much baggage it's just not worth it for them when there are other women, better looking women with less baggage for them to have some fun with. Why should they be with you when the only thing you can offer them is drama? Sooo yea have fun winning the ''game''. (:

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Look I don't give a fuck , its not like a woman needs a man's love to be complete. And I'ts not like I am a thing. I will never marry a Man who is a 6 on the scale because you know what I am so much better than that. I don't settle for mediocry like most loosers. I am wonderful; I can cook gourmet food, know more about beer and wine than your average adult even though I am only 21, I am also straight forward and a lot less dramatic than other girls. You are just a looser

[DivaPrincess]

You are awesome ms. Coffee! Tell him!

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

No reason to get all butt-hurt I was just stating a scientific fact of how Human Males would react in said situation. If you think you can land yourself a 10 then good for you. Personally I wouldn't mind marrying a women who's a 6/10 in looks as long as she has a sweet personality, good history, loyal, is either a independent or just a moderate, no debt, & is okay with me being an atheist. but that's just me. (:

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

And I wouldn't want to marry a sexist jerk with low standards.

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

Well tbh no one wants to marry a sexist anything. & My standards aren't low I just value other things more than just looks. But then again I'm also sexually attracted to women who could be called anywhere from curvy to bbw's. So maybe it's just me... :/

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

well you come off as a sexist jerk on your comments and lots of girls would agree with me on that

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

I'm sure there are lots a girls here who would agree with you on that. But the real question is why? Answer I have different opinions & views on life & they just happen to not like my opinions & views. I could change myself into the type of person they want me to be but really let's be honest here. I'm not going to change myself into a person with tolerable & PC views. That's not who I am & I will never be that kind of person. I think you & the girls who disagree with me are confusing sexism---

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Because you assumed that our value was affected by our number of partners and that is immoral. You should always look at a person male/female/trans in a non horible judgmental cis gender manner because you are denying their uniqueness as an individual

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

----With Offensiveness aka - You're ANGERED by my views which are so polar opposite to that of your own & you consciously/subconsciously think ''how dare this Mans opinions differ from mine''. & I'm not mad that you're doing this. After all a lot a people seem to be confusing definitions & there own emotions these days. (:

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Its not a how dare you think that my opinon is different than mine. I just think its wrong to treat women who sleep around as worthless sluts.

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

They aren't ''worthless sluts'' there are Men out there who have fetishes for Women who ''sleep around'' & there might be Men without those fetishes who're romantically attracted to such Women but I'm not one of them & I can't help that I'm not. It's genetic so I can't control it. What you're asking for is like me asking a Man who is gay to find Women attractive. It's unreasonable & unfair cause they can't help that they feel that way so why do you demand that I & Men like me feel a certain way?

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

I don't think that is genetic it is a concious choice and thats okay but you were putting me down with your initial comment and you pissed me off

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

A conscious choice would mean that said Man can control & stop himself from reacting negatively in a emotional way after finding out his S. O. had a ''colorful'' past but you see no Man can control how he feels or how his emotions react to certain situations. He can't help it if he falls out of love with his S. O. after discovering the truth. The only thing he can do is react & by that I mean realizing that he no longer loves his S. O. so he must leave her. It's not a conscious choice just----

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

----A conscious reaction after the fact. (:

[sovetskii13]

It's best to find someone you love and enjoy being with. Whether he's the only person ever in your life or not. More partners does not necessarily mean better (or worst).

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

If you feel that you are going to regret it then why don't you go into a night club & slut it up? TBH I don't understand what you're trying to regret from. I mean it's not like any women who has a high # of sex partners is even considered marriageable by an Alpha Man when he has so many options to choose from & really what women in her right mind wants to marry a beta for anything more than his bottomless wallet?

So my answer is slut it up if you wish to marry a Filthy Rich White Collar Beta or don't slut it up if you wish to marry a Poor to Average income Blue Collar Alpha your choice really...

[DivaPrincess]

So higher partners considered sluts and for men? Also men like it both ways. But cannot have it. If I were to say I am saving myself for marriage the same Alpha male would run the other way. Women can't win in this fucked up male world can they?

[ProTraceurDGDJ]

QA, You could date Alpha Men in more serious places instead of like night clubs. How about spreading a wide net & just agree to go on a date from any man that asks you & try to find yourself a diamond in the rough. Think of it as kissing a lot of toads till you find your prince. (:

[abundantlyrich]

You can if you have a high sex drive and want experience different men.

[Jager66]

When women have multiple sexual partners their sensitivity to the hormones released from sex decreases, this has a strong and negative effect on their ability to pair bond.

So if you want to keep the ability to pair bond to a mate then yes you will regret it, if you don't care about pair bonding then you will regret missing out on lots of sex partners.

[DivaPrincess]

That is so backwards. Can you cite sources please cause it sounds like something Sarah Palin would say. Did you know circumcision affects the mans ability to have true sexual sensation during sex?

[Jager66]

Sure can but I don't have all the sources memorized and it's not my job to educate you but this should be a good start. LOTS of info out there if you like reading, it's not politically correct though so it's only for those with an mind open to learning. socialpathology.blogspot.com.au/.../...t-post.html

Yes I do know that about genital mutilation (lets call it what it is).

[DivaPrincess]

Not your job. LOL! Have you ever been to college where you have to cite your sources? Do not say stuff without scientific proof.

[Jager66]

This is not college dear, just thought I'd point that out to you as you obviously can't tell the difference between a limited character opinion blog and a dissertation. I gave you a good head start on the scientific info anyway, just in case you actually do care to learn on the subject, but you have now shown your mind to be closed though so I doubt any amount of proof will convince you. Thanks for responding it's been a good laugh =)

[DivaPrincess]

You are arrogant sir. Have a great life!

[maiez]

Same position for me, my girlfriend is extremely good to me and I wouldn't want to leave her, but I would like to know what it's like to have sex with someone else.

[DivaPrincess]

That is honest of you to say.

[inquisitiveemt]

You should talk to her about this.

[maiez]

Nah, I'm okay being with her for the rest of my life, if it comes to that.

[Tequilashot]

Life without sex might be safer but It would be unbearably dull, It is the sex instinct which makes us seem beautiful.

[BayHarborButcher]

That's entirely up to you.

[Anonymous]

According to studies, women regret sleeping around so much, while men regret not sleeping around more.

[Anonymous]

I've personally had sex with 6 partners and honestly I could have done without 3 of them and I don't think I would have missed out on anything at all. Not saying that they weren't fun experiences though and by the way one out of those 3 special ones was just a friend with benefits. Sex doesn't always have to be about love to be extremely meaningful. Sex and love can be detached and when they are it's still a beautiful experience.

Now to numbers, the truth is that they don't really matter much. Experiences are nice, but it's not what it's all cracked up to be.

Do what makes you happy though and don't be afraid of what anyone else will think about it. It's your life

[Anonymous]

Why? it all depends on the REASON. If you are doing it for numbers, then it's lame.

If you are doing it because you legitimately like a guy a lot then sure why not.

[DivaPrincess]

Just to have more experience. I am the type who has to be in love and loved to do it. But I wonder if that wasn't a good idea.

[Opinion Owner]

So do it when you are in LOVE with someone. You don't need experience. As a guy, I would never put a girl down if she has low or no experience. I'd respect that she didn't want to sleep around a lot. So when you fall in love then go for it, if that's how you feel about it. But don't do it because friends tell you too or any other lame reason. Do it in my mind for the right reasons. And for you it seems like you want to do it when you fall in love. So go with your feeling

[DivaPrincess]

Right I understand. Not for just high numbers I just see the freedom and experience interesting. Inhibition and stuff. Believe me I take their advice with a grain of salt.