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How can i orgasm, please help?

i'm a virgin and i'm not quite ready for sex, but my boyfriend has been fingering me for a while, yet i can never seem to orgasm, and i really want to

and you might tell me to give myself an orgasm, experiment with myself but that didn't help either

i'm afraid it might be a mental block but whenever i even get close (i think) my body painfully cramps up and it gets uncomfortably hot in my vagina, like as if i'm gona piss lava

no matter what though, i always get this strange feeling in my urethra like as if i have to pee but it won't come out

last night however, my boyfriend was fingering me from behind and i didn't cramp up and the pleasure was great as always, but out of nowhere i felt a drop of liquid come out of my urethra while he was fingering me, i think it was a drop of pee and so i'm scared, my boyfriend says it couldn't have been

i seriously do not know what to do, we need help, because this makes me really sad and i don't want to have to wait to have sex just to get one
How can i orgasm, please help?
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