I am the only female virgin by DEFAULT among my family and friends. Is it wrong to be jealous and bitter about it?

thecrazycatlady
Growing up I use to not care about this sort of thing. I always said i would wait for the one i love to do anything like that. But- -

It didn't slap me in the face until a few years ago when my cousin who was 16 at the time lost her virginity. She was like a little sister who looked up to me, we were both black sheep and struggled with our weight. It was great that i had someone to relate to, but after this occurred she changed.

It really hurt me a lot, because she started to look her nose down at me, and say things like.

"Oh you need to live a little, go outside, and meet a boy."

I had other cousins teasing me saying.

"Oh she lost her virginity before you and she was younger ha ha ha - - I was 19 at the time."

- -

My best friend and partner and crime kinda distanced herself from me as well when her LD boyfriend came to live with her... and then they were having sex, and she'd brag to me about it. Before him
we had plans to move in together, but of course that changed.
I remember crying because i felt alone, but most of all i felt jealous... it was weird, because virginity is something that i value a lot, i always have.

- - - Flip to now I am 23 years old.
I've never had a boyfriend or been kissed, yet all of my old friends and family who are around my age are married or in long committed relationships. Some even have children too. I see this and become so bitter.

I am socially awkward so I know it isn't happening anytime soon...

As i said I DO value my virginity a lot, i just get so jealous when i see happy couples. I just wish i knew how it felt too...

I am a women I have desires and needs too, but due to my hermit like personality im looked at as a child and isn't taken seriously like any of my other female siblings. Is it wrong to feel this way? Am i just being selfish?
I am the only female virgin by DEFAULT among my family and friends. Is it wrong to be jealous and bitter about it?
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