Condoms, Lube, and Accessories

Most people who expect to become sexually active, or who already are, will want to figure out a condom routine, so they always have some when they need them.

Condoms are fairly effective as birth control - about 85% in normal use, but they also help prevent the spread of disease very effectively. Both surface skin areas and wet areas can transmit and catch diseases, so wrapping that rascal helps prevent disease in several ways.

When I was first sexually active, our condoms were *horrible*. They were thick and ripped all the time. What we didn't know is that condoms must be used with lubricant, and many types of condoms used to be dry in the package.

Luckily condom technology has improved a lot in the past several years. They are usually packed with some lubricant, and they are thinner and more durable as researchers develop new materials. That said, you should plan to have additional lubricant because what comes on the condom is often insufficient.

Condoms, lube, and accessories.

Lubricant: Make sure that your lubricant is condom-safe. That means that it doesn't create drag or deteriorate the material of the condom. Things like natural oils (coconut, olive), hand lotions or cold creams, or anything with petroleum jelly (Vaseline) are BAD for condoms. Typically sexual lubricants will be either water-based or silicone-based and can usually be purchased where condoms are sold.
https://www.girlsaskguys.com/sexual-health/a48218-get-wet-the-ins-outs-of-good-sex-lube

Storage and Carrying: Condoms are not hard to store. If the temperature is comfortable for you to be in, your condom will be safe too. Extreme heat or cold are not good, so don't store in the glove compartment of the the car. Storing for long periods inside your wallet is also a bad idea. Be sure to mind the expiration dates on your condoms as well. You can put a couple in your pocket or handbag, but keep them safe from sharp things like keys and pens.

A case like this can be handy, and you can tuck-in single use lube packets:

Condoms, Lube, and Accessories

These condoms come in a tube and you can use the top and bottom as a handy condom case: https://www.onecondoms.com/collections/condoms

Usage: It's important that you use the condoms right, every time, for maximum protection. This involves putting them on correctly, withdrawing before the penis gets soft again, and proper removal and disposal. Please read the following for how to use correctly: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control/condom/how-to-put-a-condom-on

These condoms have a little handle to help you put them on: https://wingmancondoms.com/

Choosing the Best Condom: There's a lot of variety out there. The typical drug-store brands are all very high quality, so you should feel free to choose based on size and features. In some countries, several sizes are commonly sold. In other countries you get "regular" or "bigger than regular" unless you special order. I recommend https://www.condom-sizes.org/ to help you find the best fit. They even carry a brand that offers *60* different sizes. Some other condom options include non-latex, ribbed/textured, scented/flavored, but most people find the basic standard issue condom works well.

Buying condoms the first few times can be embarassing. You wonder if the clerk thinks you're too young or a sex fiend. Once you do it a few times though, your realize no one else cares. You can also buy them online through Amazon, and many drug-stores offer them through their websites. No one should go without condoms due to the expense though. Clinics, public health centers and outreach programs give away millions of free condoms every year. https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a12026234/these-are-the-10-best-places-to-get-condoms-for-free/

Condom Philosophy: Based on my years as a sexual health educator, I have heard many stories. The common complaint is from men who don't care for how they feel. Choosing a better size can often make all the difference. So can putting a dab of lube into the tip of the condom. If young men learn to masturbate using condoms, they will be more likely to find using them for sex perfectly acceptable.

Make the condom discussion something you have before you hit the sheets, and talk about when your partner last had STD testing done. Ask to see results. In the US, free STD testing is widely available. The CDC website can help you locate testing in your area: https://gettested.cdc.gov/

Who Should Carry Condoms: Men, women, and gender non-conforming people should expect to carry their own condoms and lube to the party. It's not the man's job or the woman's job. It's YOUR job if you want to keep yourself safe. Having condoms doesn't mean you're a slut or a fuckboy. They mean you care about your health.

Condoms, Lube, and Accessories
6 5

Most Helpful Girl

  • A very thoughtful and interesting read. Thank you for taking the time to put this together. I enjoyed reading it.

    As an aside question - to the people that do not like to use condoms because the feel of condoms vs the feel of skin on skin is no comparison - what do you suggestion they do with condoms to make it feel more natural, more skin on skin... is there anything they can do to make condom use more pleasurable?

    Asking for a friend... lol! :p

    • Men masturbate with condoms on. Good fit. Dab of lubricant in tip of condom.

    • I have heard that. In your opinion, does that help him making it feel more like skin to skin?

    • Yeah, a lot more. You can try some of the new condoms made with advanced materials, or you can use another form of contraception and both get STD tested.

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  • Thanks. Everyone should read this and try the new products.

  • This is super useful stuff!! Thank you for sharing it with us!

  • Over-The-Top Great, as always Ms MC!
    You're the best Guru I know!

    • ... and Ms @QueenofCups or course!

  • Informative MyTake. I knew a good deal of this information already, but it's always good to review again. Haven't used condoms in quite awhile, but it would have been handy to have that little case when I was using them.

  • I heard at planned parenthood that people are trying to get rid of birth control which is dumb. If there wasn't birth control they so many girls will be getting pregnant or sick.
    #standupforbirthcontrol

  • Oh it is my sex ed teacher again, how are ya doin? The basic problem is "queen of the squirts", there is no condom large enough for me that is sold in the us--Mega big boy is the largest and it is too tight. And why the f is that I wonder--so I got fixed. Any other great ideas? How about a sex ed course on how to get a dry girl with a small clit wet? That would be useful in your series.

    • Did you visit: https://www.condom-sizes.org/ ? Because without condoms, you also risk STDs.

      I will be writing one about female arousal and orgasm in future, but it will take time. Too much to say in too little space. Not all women can "get wet". That's why having lubricant on hand is so important.

    • You really are genuinely into this aren't you--well good for you. thanks by the way.

    • Well, it's pretty simple for me. I came of age in a time when young men I knew were dying of HIV. I can't even describe how awful it was. But we know so much about safer sex now. And we know so much about how bad all the other STDs can be, not to mention unplanned pregnancies. I just think someone should be willing to talk to everybody candidly about the facts. Not scare tactics. Just education. So I began my career as a peer educator for Planned Parenthood when I was 15 (before the Intenet). When I went to college I was a peer educator with the health center. I have expanded in some of my focus since then, and I have a lovely side career as a sexuality coach and speaker. A friend turned me on to GAG and this became part of a three-year project for me to develop explicitly honest materials for a more radical approach to sex education in the face of the porn era.

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  • I’ve had sex 5 times with the same guy in the past 8 days and we didn’t use a condom. We were both virgins so no chance of STD.

  • Thanks for inviting me. Very educational. I've found the Trojan's Bareskin condoms to be pretty good, and the ones with spermicide. After I had my fourth kid, I decided to have an IUD so we wouldn't have to use them anymore for exactly the reason you stated: My husband hated them! But I wouldn't mind going back. Part of me feels like I shouldn't have had to put in this implant just to please my SO, but 20/20 hindsight. Can you do one on toys? And/or female orgasms? (I kind of speculated you were a sexual health educator from the takes I've read by you!)

    • I'm going to make a statement here about the Spermicide Nonoynol-9. The same thing it does to the sperm, it does to the tender tissue of the vaginal walls and many women find them immediately irritating, or if used often, they find they get yeast and bacterial infections more often, but the worst thing is that Nonoxynol-9 opens up micro-tears in the tissue and that makes it easier to catch and transmit a disease.

    • Ewww... I didn't know that. Good info. Better not use that anymore.

  • This is a good note for the basics. It should be a pamphlet given out to everyone.

  • Thanks for the invite, but I'm exclusive with my wife who has had her tubes tied. So bare-back for us. When I did use condoms (over 15 years ago) I found that I liked Lifestyle brand, and of course I kept one or two with me all of the time.

    • I think that's great. That's how it should be. When you're dating, condoms. But later, you may not have to use them. This is good input from you.

  • Quite helpful. I am a little confused on the about 85% in normal use part because the label says 98 percent.

    • That's with perfect use, which many condom users are not...

  • Excellent post. It also supports condoms. Condom should be used permanently.

  • Ilike your style. But a dry condom is either old or the packet been open.. The ribbing was supposed to give extra stimulation to the women I don't know if it did. The lubrication messy but fun makes it glide plus it has a chemical in it that stops any sperm getting to its target so its good all around...

    • No, they used to come dry but they don't anymore.

    • Plus, only spermicidal lubricant has Nononoxynol-9, but Nononoxynol-9 is damaging to the vaginal tissue. I don't recommend it. Regular lubricant does not contain this ingredient.

  • ok but do you use them with a guy a girl can demand it or no sex

    • Yes, a woman can demand one or no sex.

    • yes that's true all women should demand it

  • " It's YOUR job if you want to keep yourself safe."

    With the amendment of "safe-r". No sex is safe.

  • Thanks!! This is important!

  • Good take quite informative...

    • Good take indeed!

  • Very informative n useful

  • Semen makes a woman more healthy. Don't you want sex as healthy as possible? Sorry but I got you beat this time. Janet E Smith has a DVD that goes deep into details why contraception is immoral.

    You're teaching a perversion. You can not give all your love towards a man and kill his sperm. Killing has no part of love. First of all, think of how incompatible barriers are with lovemaking. "I want to make love to you, but I've got to get my barrier in place." "I've got to get my spermicide going." "I want to give myself completely, but I'm going to kill your sperm." What is loving about that? Barriers are clearly opposed to an act of real self-giving. Moreover, semen has within it certain proteins that are beneficial for women; they have a calming and assuring effect on the woman; thus condoms deny women one of the benefits for them from sexual intercourse.

    Contraception is an insult to women. Instead of women saying fertility is a great gift, fertility is healthy, I'm not going to mess with my fertility, I'm not going to put massive doses of anything in my body to mess up my fertility, women basically apologize for their fertility. "I'm sorry. When I have sex I may get pregnant. Sure, I'll be glad to mess with my body to correct this humiliating and inconvenient feature of my sex."

    We also, by our very nature, desire to be in relationship with God. We are by nature spiritual creatures. We have a yearning to be in a good relationship and in a loving relationship with God. Contraception is also an obstacle for that relationship since we treat his great gift of fertility as a negative rather than a positive.

    https://www . catholiceducation . org/en/controversy/common-misconceptions /contraception-why-not. html

    http:// www. janetesmith . com/tag/contraception/

    • Fertility is more than just a gift. It's a responsibility. You believe people should be responsible for their fertility in one way, I believe there is more than one way. If you simply want to argue on moral grounds, I can't really argue with you. You feel how you feel. But the "science" you're trying to spout is poppycock - it is a fib and a lie and misrepresentation - false witness, and you're bearing it.

    • Why? Because anything to do with sexuality, you're automatically right about and know best? People eat food for pleasure but also to sustain life. Regardless which you eat for, it does both and the result is the same: crap coming out of your butt. So eat for pleasure: crap comes from butt. Eat for pleasure: crap comes from your butt. There are responsible ways to control fertility and that's abstinence. Explain those more than 1 ways to be responsible and I'll evaluate them. What science is there to it? If you try to prevent pregnancy, people use artificial ways to do so. They intentionally use things that interrupt their natural sexual bodies. I bet you didn't even read those links. Women have built in fertility and infertility within their body. There's other sexual ways to be satisfied other than intercourse when not wanting babies and when doing them, contraception isn't needed because it's non-penetrative sex.

    • I meant eat for pleasure, crap out. Eat for life, crap out.

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