Sexual Health
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Raising An Uncircumcised Son As A Circumcised Father

With circumcision rates in the United States trending downward, there are a lot of boys being left intact being raised by fathers who were not. This naturally leads to questions on what to expect and what care needs to be given. Anxiety over this may even lead to some fathers leaning towards circumcision, when in reality caring for an uncircumcised boy isn't any more difficult than caring for a circumcised boy.

Its Attached At First

At birth the foreskin is adhered to the glans in most boys. While some boys can retract their foreskin early in life, most may not be able to retract their foreskin until their early teen years. Retraction of the foreskin should not be forced, as doing so can cause pain and bleeding, and even scaring and permanent adhesions. A boy being unable to retract his foreskin is not necessarily a indication of phimosis, and in fact in the United States the lack of frequent exposure to uncircumcised boys has lead to frequent misdiagnosis in boys. The only person who should ever retract a boy's foreskin is the boy himself.

Some boys can retract their foreskin as early as 1 year old, some not until after 10 years old.
Some boys can retract their foreskin as early as 1 year old, some not until after 10 years old.

Cleaning

As long as the foreskin doesn't easily retract, only the outside needs to be cleaned. If the foreskin retracts a little, the exposed portion of the glans should be cleaned with water. Do not use soap on the penis, and always gently pull the foreskin back over the glans after cleaning. As boys get older and the foreskin has completely separated and retracts easily it should be retracted fully for cleaning during each bath and/or shower. Bubble baths can cause problems, but not in every child.

Ballooning

As the foreskin separates from the glans throughout the early years of a boy’s life, urine can momentarily swirl around underneath the foreskin in spots where it has already separated from the glans. It is not unusual for urine to fill up these pockets between the foreskin and glans briefly during urination. This is often referred to as “ballooning” because it appears as just that: a balloon being blown up, then deflated. This is normal and nothing needs to be done, as long as the urine being passed, in fact this ballooning can speed up the separation of the foreskin from the glans.

Raising An Uncircumcised Son As A Circumcised Father

Mesh

The mesh in swimming trunks can pinch the genitals of any person who wears them. When the fabric is wet, it expands, and any loose skin can enter the holes in the mesh. Then as the fabric dries and contracts it can pinch that skin creating a painful situation. To avoid this you can cut the mesh out of swim trunks, have him wear underwear or swim briefs under swim trunks, wear swim briefs instead of trunks, or wear swim trunks that have smooth fabric in areas the genitals are exposed to.

These trunks have smooth fabric in the areas of the liner exposed to the penis.
These trunks have smooth fabric in the areas of the liner exposed to the penis.

Tugging and Pulling

Babies naturally touch their genitals as they are learning about their bodies. Tugging and pulling on their penis and foreskin is part of this. Tugging and pulling also starts the process of separating the foreskin from the glans. Boys know what hurts and what does not so they will not prematurely retract their foreskin. If their foreskin is separated from the glans and they do retract it, make sure it is back in place over the glans before putting a diaper back on him.

#parenting

#uncircumcised

#foreskin

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, and ballooning also helps to rinse out the foreskin of any smegma.

    A company called Kanvas by Katin makes "board shorts" that are swim trunks with no mesh inside.

    Like with women, a good warm sit-down bath and soaking the "naughty bits" helps keep them clean and smeling good. No scrubbing or harsh treatment needed.

    I had an uncircumcised student when I taught preschool and his own doctor had tried to force back his foreskin and he ended up with a very sore penis. Luckily no bad infection and he did heal. But I remember telling his mother about how sore he was when I was doing diaper changes and she was so mad at that doctor she was fit to be tied.

    • Since when do kindergarten teachers examine boys' genitals without the presence of the child's parent? I don't see this as a school-related issue and is best left to the advice of a pediatrician. I can't imagine any competent physician attempting to force back a child's foreskin without risking injury. The fact that you refer to genitalia as "naughty bits" says to me that you have a real problem giving out sound advice on this topic although you're obviously a real "hands-on" teacher.

    • Really upsetting to hear that about the preschooler. Never had any problems with swim trunk mesh. I do think it's funny sometimes the pro-circ people bring up foreskins getting stuck in zippers, like this is some kind of super common problem. I suspect it happens about as often as a womens labia getting caught in a zipper.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Very good article!

    I have a foreskin too but I can't retract it so far until I see the glans because otherwise it would hurt.

    *someone* told me it is probably a problem. This same someone is a female 🙄 but she's not an urologist.

    I see no problems with it at all.
    If it's not broken, don't fix it.

    • It is a problem its called phimosis

    • You need to stretch it- like earlobe stretching. They sell weights online. It supposedly takes a long time but people who do it are very happy with the results.

    • @WifeInNeedOfAdvice yeah. Probably with some "exercise" it will do it. However i think it's no deal.

    • Show All

  • Hard to believe that uncircumcised males have been wandering the earth for many millions of years without the need for modern medical staff to correct them.
    I guess nowadays circumcision is seen as abusive thus the downward trend in the US.
    Not sure other countries performed circumcision as much.

    • Besides the USA and Israel, male circumcision is mostly practiced where FGM is practiced. Its almost as if its a barbaric outdated practice.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Good for you for breaking this abusive cycle! I've also heard forced retraction is common in countries lile the U. S. where circumcision is so common doctors and daycare workers don't know how to handle foreskin. The forced retraction can lead to infection which is what gives the false notion in people's heads that "foreskin causes infections". Nonsense. People in Europe/Asia/South America have never circumcised and they're fine. Vaginas get smegma, penises get smegma. Just have good hygiene practices and smegma won't get nasty.

  • I love this! My husband is cut but didn't cut our boys so we definitely have the same situation here

    • It honestly is so easy to care for intact boys. My wife and I both tended to overthink things at first, but in reality we haven't had to do anything special because of it (other than buying specific swimsuits online since no store here stocked ones without net liners).

    • I just make them wear undies with their swim trunks so there isn't any issues

    • And yeah almost seems easier to take care since they dont retract till they are older

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  • My son is uncircumcised, my husband is. I have been the one training my son on how to clean himself properly to avoid infections and basically just to keep himself clean. He’s 7 and so far he has done a great job.
    On the other hand, my nephew had to be circumcised at 9 years old!!! Because of an infection he got. That was a traumatic experience for the kid... so, if I had another baby boy I would circumcise him, no doubt about it.

    • The traumatic experience still happens even if the child can't remember it. The brain still maps the events despite the lack of concious memory.

      Additionally infants can't be fully anesthetized. See here: edition.cnn.com/.../

    • And: www.psychologytoday.com/.../myths-about-circumcision-you-likely-believe

    • Most infections happen because parents wash underneath the foreskin of their children with harsh soaps. This upsets the skin's PH levels and may potentially cause infection.

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  • Reading this take, I get the idea that uncircumcised is actually really unhygienic and that there are only a few who would take care of that bellow to match the hygiene of a circumcised.

    • Unless you've got a medical issue, ie it won't pull back properly for cleaning then being uncircumcised shouldn't be a big deal. It's just part of normal routine like keeping any other part of your body clean and can be done very easily for most of us.

    • People say the same thing about vaginas in countries where FGM is practiced.

  • I'm circumcised, so is my son. No socks in this family lol

  • Thank you for this! It was very educational

  • I feel like people particularly mothers just be cutting it off for looks which is gross. I will not be snipping my son.

    • Same here. Cutting your son's genitals because you prefer the appearance is borderline incestuous and pedophiliac.

    • And just fucking stupid

    • Mostly this is not the case, the best indicator in the US of whether parents decide to circumcise their boys is the status of the father, usually this has to with ignorance or being uncomfortable with what they don't understand, just not wanting to explain the different appearance to their young boy, or thinking that there penis is so great they must replicate it in there sons. But yea in the instances where the mother is the one making the call it goes to some pretty dark places.

  • Good Mytake

    • Thanks!

  • Horrible😂😂

  • It's really that big of a deal to some people? As if we don't have bigger issues?

  • When I first read the title, I had a hard time taking it seriously.

  • Hahahhahhahahahaha

  • Great mytake. I'm also uncircumcised.

  • Just my little comment here. After having read this entire article, it makes me WISH I still had MY foreskin!!

  • This has been a eye opener for me. Round heads for life 😂😂😂

  • 1st 3 look pain full

  • @AbdKilani you know it?

    • Know what?

    • @AbdKilani how can you clean your banana lol

    • Hahaha 😂

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  • Natural is best.

    • It means you dnt know the charm of circum then ;p

    • But Muslims are cut/circumcised penis.

  • Thanks for the information.

  • I couldn't image that I have no foreskin I honestly forgot it till now what a nightmare

    If I have a boy the foreskin is gone lol

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