GUYS. If you put a girl's hand on your crotch while making out?

Do you EVER just expect her to stroke it? Would it be too frustrating , having her stroke it then moving away without you cumming or without it going towards sex... Would you ever JUST want her to TOUCH it- NO STRINGS ATTACHED?

Inversely, if she seemed OK with YOU PUTTING IT THERE would you expect a hand job , blow job, or sex?

Would you loose interest in MAKING OUT in general, after putting her hand there, if none of the aforementioned were provided?

Would it be a deal breaker , if you did not know her very well yet? I.E it would seem like she had a hag up with sex , or sexual things etc. & sex , was something that you are very comfortable with, & would only want to date people who are comfortable too... ?

WANACOT: "Pretty much any guy is gonna be disappointed if you just stroke it a bit then move away." What if you stroked it fora loooooooooong time? Do guys ever like there penis to be stroked Lightly, or just Hard? What about Slow Vs. Fast?


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What Guys Said 24

  • Typically if a guy is putting your hand there it's because he wants something. Whether that something is a handjob or sex entirely depends on the guy and the situation. Pretty much every guy is going to be disappointed if you stroke it a bit then move away. However, your limits are your own so do not do anything you're not comfortable with.

    • Thank You... Just curious. & Yah, of course I would not do some thing I was not comfortable with.. Somehow if I did, it seems disrespectful to him as well, I am not sure why .... I also wanted to know what a guy expects because , while I do not mind touching him there, I've never been around anyone having an orgasm, & I would worry about making him feel uncomfortable, cause I might get uncomfortable. So I l would not do it if he was expecting HAND JOB... - May have problem talking after.

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    • Great answer, wanacot! To the questioner: I would assume a guy wants some action if he puts your hand on his crotch. And I hear you saying that you're not so comfortable with bringing him to orgasm through a handjob, and if so, I recommend you ask him if you can play with his d*ck a bit, but not necessarily to do any more than that. And ask what he's open to, but as wanacot says, only do what you enjoy! And learn from sites like Make Love, Not Porn. Let someone know if you're new at something.

    • Thanks.

      & Course I will not do anything I am not comfortable with, but I also don't want to make him uncomfortable because of that.

      If it was a spur of the moment thing, talking would be kinda REALLY awkward.. I did not want to do anything that would inspire too much thinking- we have a problem with that already.. We both way over think things, so I was trying to find a more neutral response, which is hard since I had NO idea what he wanted... We kind of agreed not to go that far {his idea} -?

  • Well I don't tend to just put a girls hand there but if I did it would be obvious what I wanted. Well If a girl purposefully touches is only to tease that could be a little irritating. If she unzips his zipper and whips it out there's almost a humanitarian code of ethics that require she go through with at least a handjob, a perfectly asseptable and enjoyable thing. If a girl took mine out with no intention of sex or a blowjob or a handjob at all It would make me angry and frusturated. Blue balls may not be deadly like some teenage boys lie and it can't be triggered that bad by just kissing this could trigger some serious and irritating blue balls

    • Yes, I understand you do not put a hand there randomly. I mean if you guys were making out, & you instinctually guided her hand there} "It would be obvious what yo wanted" Did you mean sex, or just that at the time it would be obvious, whatever it happened to be?

      Umm, if YOU guide HER hand there, then would yo be irritated if she ddi not do anything with it. Cold you just continue making out without that? { What if she did not know what to DO with it? Ha, ha. But seriously ? }

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    • We always want to. would you like to be approached on the bus or at school or at work by a man that said well I caught a glimpse of your t*ts and ass and I would like to f*** you if you would be alright with that. Perhaps you can get down on are knees suck me and then bend over. Too forward. Well that's what all men your dad your brothers all your male friends ur trusted male teacher/church leader, Gandhi all men want to say and do. And yet they don't Timing self control hard to believe huh

    • Haha actually not - I grew up in a city that somehow had this 11 year old girl- radar

      -Suddenly, I could not go anywhere without getting the request of what you just said ether verbally, with their eyes or some other physical gesture. lol

      I always assume guys want it & if they really like you, it would make them want it less -

      lol clearly a conglomeration of bad movies & personal projection.

      The stronger feeling I have for a guy the LESS they need to do have an impact on me in a major way^^

  • he put your hand there so he's clearly asking, so you should either do somthing or do nothing. being blueballed is horrible .i do like a bit of a tease tho so personalay I wouldn't mind if you just did a liitle so long as it actually was a 'we will continue this later' kind of thing, but if you do that be clear that you will help the poor fellow vent some steam later on

    • Hahaha, how much later on, I mean does that make me like 'committed' lol

      Seriously you mean like within the hour or like that day... HOw come some say blue ball is myth, & others are like it is real & it is about the worst thing that could happen to a guy....Now being a guy, & not a stupid one, I would assume that he would figure his chances are better if he DOES NOTHING. I mean, I am not exactly - well I do not know what the word is, but we have never gone there before, & don't guys have-

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    • As before, he would be ok with just kissing , but maybe that is not the reason he feels he needs more, & I guess now that I think about it, it only happened ONCE that we kissed without lying down & I guess grinding, but back then I just thought that was a COINCIDENCE^ lol.

      I guess I am wondering, that if you - a guy- REALLY LIKED A GIRL, he would be more careful about that, or he would not see that as insulting.. I could see som people thinking that is actually an intimate move^ People who do

    • Do not have hang ups about sex, which I am beginning to think he does not.. He has hangups about OTHER things lol, but not sex^

      - So I ws wondring if aguy would see that as an anti -intimate move or an intimate one - he is not shallow &most things he does is pretty well thought out..It is not that I think he did it without thinking ,cause it was REAL SLOW & GENTLE, just wondering WHAT he was thinking.. I know guys do not THINK while their Penis is- supposedly,-probably a vague thout at least^

  • just stroke him while your kissing him and stop when he isn't kissing you then if he wants you to keep stroking it he willl kiss you more so then you both get what you wants if he wants to come he will kiss you till you make him

    • Omg Someone ACTUALLY answered my question. Wow.. hahaha

      Sooo did you just come up with that- case it is clever, or is that a common thing.. It makes a lot of sense... Great idea, sto[ when he stops so he gets the idea.. I was worried he would think it would mean sex tho - & I am a virgin & I amount ready to have sex, but I thought he knew& he doesn't s e may have expected it... I wish there was a particuar way you could stroke or something that would let him know I was not having sex lol

    • Well maybe you too need to discuss your boundires pertaining to sex

      and yea I did come up with that lol

  • um, if its outside the pants then screw that cause it doesn't do anything and might just be uncomfortable with the zipper and all, as for slow or fast it would depend on if I'm trying to come or not at that point cause if its really fast for a good amount of time I'm gonna come and as for hard or gentle...pretty much same concept as the first answer if they are respectively together, if its slow/hard or fast/gentle it probbaly won't do much exept for a good feeling for a while until it gets repetitive, I don't see why you don't just go for it because what's really the difference between just givin the guy the full hand job or teasing him forever other than he isn't going to cum?

    • Well, I guess because I've never been around someone who 'came'... I don't know what I'm supposed to do while he's like in 'abandon'.. Anyways, obviosy if I was 'planning' o playing with him I would be prepared to give him a total hand job , just in case.. The situation I was I was where he giude my hand there - it's fine I am not botherd I just really did not expect it & I wanted to know if he actually was skin me to give him a h/j, or just did it automatically & I couldhave juststroked it.

  • NO to it all. It's just stupid.

    • Sorry you are so uncomfortable with yourself^

  • No I wouldn't =p

    But I sure should if she only would standing like frozen too the ground, not even touching me when I'm touching her (that would be frustrating AND a turn-off).

    • I m sorry what did you mean?

      You would not expect her to do anything, but you would LIKE her to if you are touching her?

      You do not want her to do noting, but you would not expect her to touch your penis?

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    • I mean analyzing is good, but this is really deep. haha=p

    • Ok. YOU mean you would have little to say ,, in THAT situation...

      Got it- thanks! lol


  • Not this guy.I personally love when am making out and a girl touches me the and strokes it.i have had times where am making out and the girl would unbutton my shirt ad kiss down my abs slowly, which is my A+ spot,I mean if a girl does that to me that's is way in.I have make out for half and hour plus non stop and being stroked and touched and it never went to the bed,after this the girl and I either dated or remained very close friends.

    • Thanks a lot that was really* helpful :)

  • Well if I was with a girl for 1 night stand and I put Her hand on my d*** I would want Her to start jaking me off a bit then after that expect to get some HEAD from Her. But if I put Her hand on my d*** and she just moved away I would think strait away that she wasn't going to have sex or give me HEAD .

    • @stevenmakaveli,

      I hear those are your expectations, and I get why you have them. I think what you express is very normal and typical. And I'd just like you to keep in mind that you ought to be willing to do the same. So if you put your hand on her crotch, please be prepared to also go down on her, if she welcomes you too, and please don't expect her to give you head. She's not obligated to, and that expectation can lead to coercion and oral rape. I've heard about it happening too many times.

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    • Wow Julien, I neve heard of that? How can someone force them to give them head, I mean doesn't the guy sort of have a compromised position?

      Is it like shoving her head so hard that she almost chokes kind of thing?

    • Yeah you re sure selfish stevenmakaveli, you don't just want a hand job you also want a blow job after that, yet you didn't even mention anything about eating her out or doing anything for her.... Cmon!!

      With that attitude, trust me all what you re ever going to get is a One Night Stand!

  • First thing is if the guy loses interest in making out then he was never for you ; AS, SEX IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT, TAKE CONTROL. The touching his crotch is pretty much where the control begins, and a Nuva-ring may be for you. Or, if you have given your first blow job you might want to expand your horizons and keep your love making in a room not the back seat of a VW.

    • First thing is if guy loses interest making out ..never 4 you" - yeah I agree :)

      umm lol we were standing up & we were only kissing (hence my surprise)& if I was in a relAtionship & liked someone a car might be a fun place to make out I would not leave that out.

      I am not currently sexually active so I'm not worried or interested in a ring lol but thanks.

      What did you mean by : "The touching his crotch is pretty much where the control begins"

      What do you mean by that exactly? Thanks.

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    • Yea...she just wanted to get things started. He wasn't interested. Most guys would have already been pulled out of the given area and on their way to getting it on. And, the few that were left standing there would be in complete shock.__Experience/ both situations - That is all I got.

    • :) "The touching his crotch is pretty much where the control begins"

      meaning that is how I initiate sex, or just that I can control a guy that way?

  • Nope, if you are going to go there then you need to finish what you started, teasing is not going to help a situation. If you want to know what a guy wants the best way to find out is to ask him

    • It's not teasing if you did not pt your hand there.. It's not so comfortable asking what he wants, I guess that is why he may not TELL you.

      'If YOU put a girls hand on your crotch' I agree things should be clear, but if she should ask, then why can;t he just tell her. Is it s obvious, I mean it's NEVER just ambiguous?

      People never just have there penis stroked?

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    • But you sound like nice guy & above you said you would feel teased - but you mean if she put her hand there, not in reverse?

      So yo are saying if a guy does that he can't be nice?

      & Or, he is looking for a 'job' of sorts?

      Guys can not just be stroked?


      It happens with woman all the time. A guy could touch you , & it does not mean he is going to 'finish' anything... ?

    • Not saying he can't be nice if he puts your hand there, if it were me I would be searching for something else and would be in a relationship where her and I know it is ok for me to be trying to start something that way. If you start just stroking a guy the immediate reaction is hey I want to take you somewhere. If I touch a girl in a sexual manner and start rubbing her, I would expect her to think I am wanting this to go further. Its the same on the other side, If a girl touches me

  • i hate when girls do that, but ima nice guy so I let them know that its ok. usualy when you put sum1s hand on your penis you want a handjob tho

    • - You mean when they just stroke it but don't give an actual hand job? ..If you put their hand there, then maybe you should wait for them to do it themselves. Maybe it's not 'a NICE guy' if you put it there.. I'm not judging I am just trying to figure out both sides. Do you think you could have respect for a girl, if you put her hand there, & she gave you a hand job.. Would you do that in the beginning of a relationship, or when you know them well?

      {How do you let them 'know' it's ok?)


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    • Friend request me, I'm going to log off, send me a message or sumthin k:)

    • Another time.. I've got your name- Thanks. :-)

  • I think that is kind of four play there and depending on the guy they might think some form of sex. The update, Well depending on the relationship you don't wanna give the guy a full handjob so just go light and slow.

  • alll of the above BUT for me I'm ok if it was just a touch or lingering touch because I know at some point it won't be once she see what's in store for her

  • I put a girl's hand on my crotch while we made out she stroked harder and harder until man juice came out.

    • What'd yah do after -- Tissues? :-)

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    • Oh. YOU men your too busy making out to think of guiding her hand anywhere for at least like thirty mn.?

      {In response to yo saying you' like the salty taste of a hot make out session'.}

    • Yeah pretty much

  • if you stroke his **** a little there's nothing worse than not being jerked off to completion, if he puts your hand on his crotch and you move away straight away that's fine, but if you start you have to finish, hope that helps a bit ! x

    • Yes. That s what I have been asking F. O. R. E. V. E. R. Not, is it ok? "Will he still like me?" "Is it too soon?" " Does he REALLY like me?" Or, " How do I give a blow job" Or " Is it ok if I put my hand there? " Will he like it if I pt my hand there? " " Does he expect sex if I put my hand there?". ETC. I want to know if a GUY puts a girls hand his crotch, what is he most likely expecting & is he ok if she JUST strokes it without having an orgasm,& if NOT what should she do?

    • #bigdanny,

      "if you start you have to finish"?? I don't think so. No girl or woman HAS to do anything, and is free to change her mind about doing something once it has started. Do GUY'S finish what they start when touching girls and women's genitals? Not from what girls and women tell me! So why the double standard? It's not cool to imply any female "HAS" to do something. Please check your words and advice. If she stops, you can finish the job yourself, right?

    • I did not mean to say she HAS - or I HAVE to , I am really just trying to get a sense of what guys normally expect, or what usually happens, when you did not have an elaborate discussion prior.. Honestly, I did not want to talk about anythig. My choice was eother just stay & continue with stuff I was more comfortable with - which might have made him feel weird, or just explain 'I HAD TO GO ' - which would make us both feel a little dissapointed, but at least it would be for the SAME reason.

  • If you start stroking it, it had better lead to going all the way. Otherwise that's just mean, lol

    • Does any one actually read the post.. I did not put my hand on anything lol. :) He sort of guided it there while we were kissing.. He did it so gently, I did not realize it till it was there. I stopped stuff right away, cause in case he would get really aroused{ he already had a very erection ^^} since I knew that I would not be comfortable with ANY KIND OF SEX.. But I was wondering what wouldhave been ok.. I mean if I was expecting that, I'd be fine playing with it, but I have never been

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    • Thanks.. Course I don't know if he is sorry or just embarrassed .. The thin that bother me was that he was 'capable' of it.. Not so much that he DID it....... You know, the fact he did not MIND.


    • Whoa. . Thank You for helping. I just looked at this, & I must have confused it with another post or not slept or SOMETHING^ anyways, thanks I think your first answer was totally ok.

      Maybe I could have worded it, " will a guy think the same thing if he puts your hand on his crotch rather then YOU putting it on his crotch lol

      & maybe 'does he EXPECT the same thing he would WISH to have happen?

      haha. Anyways thanks for the replies^

  • hand job blow job and sex but if not its fine

    • You mean it is reasonable to expect all, but one would be ok?

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    • Of course, I would not do it if I did not want to, I was just wondering how guy would FEEL about it.. not even how the would respond.. But what they think & feel about situations like tat . Yah, I know MAJOR generalization but well even within that different views still help.

    • Yeah well if you was to do it to me I would would feel that you wanted to so you did and I would be pleased with any of them

  • If he put your hand on his crotch sue him for sexual harassment... JK

    No he wants something sexual perferable something that starts with you using your hand but it esculating to either a bj or full on sex.

    • Haha, I was about to start explaining how I disagreed*

      .. Do you think that a guy wold EXPECT someone to be on board, or just hope that they would - well, you can't speak for everyone, but you could speculate*

      Also, do you think guys think of it as something EVERYONE likes ^^....

      .....Or do they look at it as someone doing them a favor*, or something they deserve* -depending on what happened* before that particular move?

      I am just curious, what kind of thought goes into it - if any. haha

  • Slow isn't too bad but if a girl starts touching my crotch its going to lead me to believe were about to have sex. Just saying don't be a tease. if your going to touch you might wanna finish the deal.

    • Yeah, I would probably not want to do that unless meant to OFFER. lol

      I wonder if you could tell me tho, if YOU were to guide HER hand to your crotch, would you still EXPECT sex, if she did not remove her hand? Would it make a difference if you were dressed or not? ( I mean would you expect it more if you were half dressed rather than fully dressed? _ boxers instead of jeans, for example?

      Do yo think it is ok for a guy to do that, if you are already making out?

      Does it make it cheep?

    • Well if I was the one to guide her hand, I wouldn't exactly expect sex but if she didn't move it away that's pretty much a sign. Being dressed doesn't make that much of a differrence becasue your still touching his crotch. It depends how comfortable you are with the guy to make it ok.

    • I'm glad you made that point. - " It depends how comfortable you are with the guy to make it ok. - An hour ago "

      I do not think their is anything inherently disrespectful about it but people seem to.. & Basically if a guy thinks you want have sex, he probably figures you're ok if you touch him - on top of boxers too, so that is like a warning.

      " wouldn't exactly expect sex but if she didn't move it away that's pretty much a sign "

      You mean if she does not move it you think she WANTS sex?

  • f***, so bored!

    • :) Commenting on the length of the post, or is it more of a personal existential thing?



  • I love it whenever my girlfriend touches it, no matter when or for how long. Once we watched a movie at her parents house and we had a blanket over us. That's when she did it for a really long time and I cummed, but usually we don't have enough time together to make that happen. It's okay though cause I really love her and I just want to be with her.

  • yes stroking is good

    • It iust not like just teasing you because you want sex?

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    • :-) Ok. but don't judge ( just clarify) cause he is not a jerk, it was a confusing situation & having been there I really do not think he did I in a creepy way (I am very reserved , I do mot make excuses for people sexually - this was almost innocent lol) he was under misconception that I def. wanted to have sex, & he tried to talk me out f it for a long time.. Plus, it was OVER his boxers.

      Ok, having said that, as you can assume he sort of guided my hand there, but it was slow & gentle :)

    • Also coud you tell me the different implications of each different thing. without judgement - haha



What Girls Said 1

  • ok first off just because a girl strokes your penis doesn't mean she is going to give you some I left plenty of guys with blue balls especially the one's that was bold enough to just put my hand there in he doesn't even no me like that I show him by stroking it real good then leaving him there with a hard penis lol so good luck at that nasty boy.

    • Lol you think I should have made him feel good, then left?

      >does that happen to you often- that a guy just puts it there?

      do you think in all cases it is rude?

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    • No matter what when you take her hand ask her is it ok if I place your hand on my penis see what she says and yes all guys are nasty be it in public or behind closed doors you know what I mean jerking, p*rn etc.

    • Oh I get it lol :-)

      & Good pont, I don't see why you can't ask....Also, she may not want to have sex but might be ok with fooling around- it makes it very confusing.

      I guess they don't ask because

      1.they do not want to think about what they really want.

      2 she might say no. lol

      "No matter what when you take her hand ask her is it ok if I place my penis see what she says and yes "

      Do you really leave with blue balls on you rub it to make them Suffer?

      What do you say when you leave?

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