Plan B.. Who should pay?

[Anonymous]

I've been having casual sex with this guy (though he wants it to be more and doesn't want me to have sex with anyone else) for a month now - mostly just on the weekend I booty call him. We don't use a condom (not that he's ever brought it up), and this last time we had morning sex he came inside of me, no warning at all - No guy has ever come inside me before either.

I went and got Plan B when he left, and had sent a picture of it from the store showing it was $50, and all he said was that he thought I was on BC then that I am cool for taking the pill. I am on BC however I've been on antibiotics and honestly I just kind of panicked.

I feel a little salty he didn't even offer to help me pay for it seeing as we are both students and don't have a lot of money. I probably would have said it's okay this time.. but in my mind, I pay for my BC (which is of course my responsibility), he never brings condoms, never asked me if I was on BC or if he could come inside of me then he after seeing how expensive it was he didn't even offer like support or to go splitsies or like anything at all. Not to mention Plan B is AWFUL, from the cramps, nausea, etc. I've been dealing with all week while working. I know it was my choice, and I know I am responsible for not practicing safe sex or communicating before/during about it so I don't need any responses like that, I'm beating myself up enough about it. I just feel like based on principle that's kind of a dick move and this is a bit off-putting when considering if I want to continue with him casually or relationship-wise.

So guys and gals, opinions on this situation and on the whole concept in general?

[samhradh_leannan]

I think it is decent of the guy to offer to pay or at least split the cost, since he is equally responsible for the situation and he's not the one who has to deal with the side effects of actually taking the pill. However, if he doesn't pay, you should still pay and take the pill. It's more important that the problem is taken care of, regardless of who takes care of it.

In your situation, I see why you are frustrated with this guy for not warning you, not asking you about BC, not bringing condoms, etc. But the fact is, you didn't start the conversation either. I agree if was a dick move for him to not even offer, it's one of those things. If I were you, though, I wouldn't sleep with him again without establishing a formal and fair agreement for how you'll have sex safely. I. e. That you will take turns providing the condom, or that he'll provide the condom since you're providing the BC pill.

[samhradh_leannan]

It's sad, but I think it's kind of natural that with casual sex, the guy might be more selfish and care less about you and your health than a boyfriend would. One of the many reasons why casual sex has more drawbacks for women than it does for men.

[Anonymous]

If you're in a relationship I think the guy should at least offer to split the cost. But at the end of the day its your body and you have to be responsible for yourself. If you're upset he didn't offer to pay well stop having sex with him. * thats a general view, my comment was not directed at you @asker*

[Asker]

I agree with you, I know I have to be responsible for my body and typically do practice safe sex and have taken my BC every day at the same time for years, this time was a mistake. I was just wondering if my feelings towards this are similar to others or if generally its all on the girl always.

[Opinion Owner]

I think generally its always on the girl. I've been lucky to have dated guys who had offer to pay for my BC or even split the cost because they were scared of me getting pregnant. But generally, a lot of guys don't really take it as part of their responsibility.

[Asker]

Yeah, I figured the fear of knocking me up would've elicited some sort of gesture even of for himself. That's a shame though - I see the defense of both sides to a point but I suppose I've found out that if I am going to consider getting into something more serious with him, or any guy - knowing that we both take responsibility is important to me, even if it's not to others haha so that's a positive (Haha :) )

[Opinion Owner]

Good luck and I hope you find an equally responsible guy.😊👍👍

[Sbelle]

pay for it. i totally agree the antibiotics can mess it up, but you're the one who has to face the consequences. he won't understand what the plan b does to you physically & will continue to finish inside thinking you're not going to get pregnant.
maybe it's time to end it.

[mistixs]

I meant to click "guys pay" but accidentally hit "girls pay"

[Glen68]

I feel like since he never asked if you take bc and doesn't bother to wear a condom that he really didn't care if you got pregnant or not and would just split if you did. it was a dick move to not at least offer to pay for the plan b since it was his responsibility to pull out before cumming. did he at least apologize or seem like it was accidental when he came inside you?

[Asker]

Nope! He didn't say a word. I wasn't sure at first but realized what the feeling was and panicked!

[Glen68]

that jerk doesn't deserve any more of your time then

[Glen68]

thank you for choosing me

[SnapTsch]

how about you dont need to take things till plan B?
how about you don't have unprotected sex with your booty call?
does that sound reasonable enough?

[Asker]

Your hostility is uncalled for. I simply asked a question. I already took responsibility for being irresponsible - however BOTH of us were irresponsible and I am left with taking all of the responsibility hence my question. And as for your first comment, are you referencing me taking BC? I take a specific BC because I have an issue with my hormones that if not taken care of can be dangerous for my health.

[SnapTsch]

I am not being hostile and I apologize if it seems that way. its just that I hate to see people risk their futures and dreams just because they are too cool to wear condoms. now he is at fault here, but you should have held him up for that. as you can clearly see, he doesn't have much fucks to give if you end up in a problem.

[Asker]

Oh, sorry I must have just misinterpreted! But I completely agree - as I responded to another answer a minute ago, I normally do practice safe sex and I take my birth control exactly as I should so Plan B is new to me. This time I just panicked haha. I think you are dead on with your last point.. and I think that's why I asked the question. To see if it was the norm for guys to respond the way he did or if I'm just with a guy who doesn't care to take responsibility. Thank you for answering!

[bourbonsunset1216]

whoever wants it needs to be the one to pay. if the chick doesn't want to be pregnant but the guy doesn't mind, she needs to pay, if vice versa, the guy needs to. and if it's a shared opinion, then split it.

[UncleRayRay]

Your responsibility if you don't want the child

[321rose]

Why this guy who never offers to pay

[BillieJean1070]

So once you have it... what are you going to do if it doesn't work?

[Anonymous]

split it

[Anonymous]

You pay for it.
And here's your sign.
dailyentertainment.me/.../...eed.ic.VLYYiINCIJ.jpg

[Anonymous]

You should pay for it 100 %.

[Anonymous]

You are an awful person. Pro-Abortion, and having casual sex. Disgraceful.

[Asker]

Those are your personal opinions, and were not necessary to share as they did not answer my question. You passed a bunch of judgements, none of which are valid. We are not dating really, so it's casual sex and I did not say anything about abortion. Grow up a bit, yeah?

[Opinion Owner]

PLan B is a form of abortion. and shame onyou

[samhradh_leannan]

Plan b only works if you're not yet pregnant. That's why you have to take it right away.