I am worried I am asexual, I really really don’t want to be?

[Pixy26]

As a teenager, I only ever was attracted to 2 guys. I liked them cause they looked and acted a lot older and more mature than their real age. I used to fantasise about them but it was never about sex, just making out with them in bed. I never really knew what horny felt like either and I learned to masturbate at age 19 :/ but every since learning, I can atttibute a feeling I used to have and not know what it was, to a libido. When I had this feeling as a teen, I’d fantasise about kissing etc etc. When At University, I never found anyone attractive, or if so rarely. Until I met this guy who sparked a little bit of interest, I found myself imagining myself having sex with him and the thought was appealing. But when I got to kiss him I didn’t enjoy it and it didn’t turn me on. I had sex with him cause it’s want I thought I had wanted but I just didn’t feel anything. Last year, I met another guy. I didn’t find his looks attractive but as I got to know him, I had the urge to touch him and kiss him and I was aroused all the time around him. When he did kiss me, it was the best thing ever but I didn’t get the urge to have sex at the time. But as soon as I got home, I was desperate to have sex with him and thinking about him kissing me turned me on so much. I really want to find a guy I am attracted to and want sex. Could all this be because I have slight depression and struggling with stress all the time and I don’t feel like I have a sex drive at all recently. Some months it’s really high, others I only have a sex drive at certain times of the month and some months it’s non existent, is this normal? Sex is appealing in my head but when comes the time I just don’t get aroused. I get turned on by phone sex and texting but in real life I just can’t. Could this be just cause it’s the wrong guy, I didn’t feel I liked him for his personality. could I just be picky? Do most girls walk down the street and want to sex instantly with hot guys they see? As I don’t

[Anonymous]

Women are vastly, exponentially, hornier than men. A woman will do just about anything, sexually speaking, so long as she is fairly certain she won’t get caught. For example, we will occasionally go out of town in order to rendezvous with a man we’ve been longing to fuck, and/or to have multiple sex partners in the same evening, and/or at the same time.
This is something that hot women do, most especially. In our minds, it is a natural desire, and a natural thing, and so long as nobody else finds out, it’s “game on”. Women are receptacles for cock, that’s how we have been biologically designed. Nothing feels better to us than being completely filled up with multiple penises, than being the center of sexual attention, than being the object of unbridled group lust. Since it’s something we can’t risk doing on our home turf (don’t shit where you eat), we have to think outside the box, in order to get our boxes completely satisfied. And you might find this shocking, but many women – many, many women – have sex with dogs on a routine basis. This is just one example of how insatiable we truly are.
I can see why you might not believe it, to which I say, look really hard at all of the women you know who have dogs. Look at women who have dogs whenever you see them out on the street, in the act of walking those dogs. Or at the park. You will notice that most of them have male dogs – the vast majority, in fact. This isn’t a coincidence. And look at all the female teachers who are exposed in the media for having sex with underage students. We have no self-control when it comes to sex – or anything else, for that matter. To our way of thinking, losing control is what makes sex great. Doing anything that is taboo is what makes sex great.

[devilman666]

It could be due to something traumatic in your past, but I don't see a reason to assume it to be that.

Your changing sex drive might be depression. Mine can also go up and down depending on my general mood. I don't think my sex drive ranges nearly as much as yours though.

I very highly doubt you are asexual, asexual is defined by a lack of sexual attraction to anyone. Though, you may still be on the asexual spectrum, I am demisexual personally but I think you would be more of a gray-a. It's worth googling and taking a look at, but I can't explain grey-a very well. Demisexual = lack of sexual attraction to others until you develop emotion/romantic feelings/fall in love.

[Anonymous]

you´re not picky... that´s just you... you simple see a relationship being good for you, without the sex... using other words, sex is not important for you in a relation... other things are more important, like being in bed until late, you now, enjoying other things that are important in a relation to...

i will give my personal opinion about that... of course i like the sex... but in my opinion its more important the care that the other person has for you, if he/she makes you smile, walking on the beach... the sex it just the highest point of the relation... but you have much more things between before reaching the highest point of everything... but that just my opinion...

[yousir]

You haven't found a mental connection with anyone- or a spiritual connection, if you prefer.

[wankiam]

i think its just you dont like the actual touch of men more than never feeling arousal so that does not make you asexual but you may be either autosexual or maybe you haven't discovered yet that you like girls instead

[Pixy26]

Not into girls but when I was out with this guy, and he starts looking at me in a cheeky way, touching the small of my back or neck, I get really turned on, but when we’re in the bedroom, for some reason it doesn’t feel the same :/

[wankiam]

can i ask if you enjoy masturbation and if you do what do you think about?

[Pixy26]

I do, I used to think about the guy I was seeing and what we’d do. But when it actually happened, it wasn’t like my fantasy. My thoughts are maybe that he was bad at it, especially as he was bad at kissing. I haven’t masturbated for other a month, usually it’s like every other day :(

[wankiam]

i didn't mean to pry but it may be the key to this. maybe you are just a masturbater with no real interest in real sex. its not common but i can confirm there are a few of us

[Pixy26]

But I want to enjoy sex like I’m desperate to have it and enjoy it with someone. Maybe it’s just the stress I’ve been under

[wankiam]

maybe thats it but its sometimes more than just stress which is why i asked

[wankiam]

one thing is for sure anyway. we have established that you are not asexual

[characterJoe]

Exercise such as running or coregasm exercise helps stimulate blood flow in the erogenous area. You could try a supplement for women with Tribulus Terrestis, which may increase your desire.

[MindTime]

I think it's just a matter of finding the right person you feel connected with completely- that you are attracted to and get aroused by. If you were asexual, you likely wouldn't have any sexual desire at all

[jdrrichmond]

I think you will figure out what is right for you. There are no rule to attraction. (Except legality) depression, stress, and anxiety will kill your sex drive. For that and just your overall happiness, you should at least consider talking with a doctor or therapist.

[zulqarnain909]

Asexual means?

[devilman666]

Lack of sexual attraction to others.

[zulqarnain909]

Okay

[mayank89]

You are just thinking too much. Live in the moment and not think far ahead

[Anonymous]

You could just have a low sex drive. You can find a sympathetic therapist to discuss it.

The fact that you've been like this for years indicates it's probably not medical or physical.

[Anonymous]

Could be performance anxiety issues. Happened to me many times. I think about sex, masturbate but when I am with someone there's no desire even though I love the person.

[Anonymous]

You are not asexual