How do I teach my girlfriend to give better oral?

My girlfriend really sucks at giving head. It gets to the point that at any time she attempts it I just want to tell her to stop, please, and for the love of god get off..

The problem is her biting and lack of sensation. I tried to explain this to her but she easily gets offended and is overly sensitive. She insists that I'm being to particular about it and claims to have never disappointed a guy before.. Now I'm starting to doubt she ever had a boyfriend.

She really believes that guys have very simple instruments that aren't hard to please. I tried to show her the layer of nerve receptors on my penis (Frenulum) to explain that at that spot is really the only place where I feel pleasure and that its tricky to pleasure it with your hands and mouth.

Alas, she takes the approach that all a penis needs is a quick up and down hand stroke on repeat like a bad record.. Giving me a bad friction burn in the morning. ouch.

Suggestions please.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I always suggest this to every couple having arguments and issues where there no reciprocal of understanding: TALK.

    Sit down with her, and EXPLAIN to her that this pity issue is getting on your nerves now and that she needs to understand that. Tell her that these p*rnstars in videos DO NOT really arouse their men (on viagra) at all. Real sex is always very different from p*rn. The passion and love is absent in the harsh unfriendly p*rno. Since she is your girlfriend, she will understand if you explain this to her the right way.

    Give her advice on better blowjobs.

    I suggest you tell her to start of with wet kisses all around your crotch and then slowly transcend into gentle strokes with the tongue. TELL HER TO NOT NOT NOT use the hands on your penis. It is a TOTAL turnoff when the girl is squeezing the d*** up and down like a psycho. Another very 'orgasmic' technique is you gently lying on the bed with your legs wide open and her giving kisses right next to your crotch and then as you start to get an erection she licks your penis from down to up.

    Another extremely hot technique is her pouting her wet lips with her tongue slightly sticking out and brushing your penis down and up and vice versa. Like her gently holding your shaft between her lips horizontaly and painting it with her saliva. Notice how the hands are not used except holding the legs apart and massaging the insides of your thighs.

    If she is hard to explain to. Just teach her while you have sex.

    She will listen like most girls do.

    In return you must give her the most orgasmic oral sex of her life too. If you need some ideas I will elaborate but at least you get the picture.

    I spent time on this post because I understand that sex is the reason why most supposed to work couples break up. What people don't realize is that TALKING is the solution when both partners have potential but do not perform.

    Now your homework is to get her when she is free and a little turned on. Make her sit on your lap, and explain. Not like a critic but a boyfriend. Tell her you don't want her sex, you want her LOVE, because your love is the reason why you get in bed with her. She will understand. THEN you explain to her what you want.

    And then, you take a practical test, she will score a 100%, Trust me this works Haha

    • " It is a TOTAL turnoff when the girl is squeezing the d*** up and down like a psycho."

      haha too true. Also good points on talking, communication is where it's at.

      She shouldn't be insisting on defending her competence, instead focus on having her make it feel right for you. Everyone is different, surely she can appreciate that people have different turn-ons.

    • love this answer

      explains everything even gave me an idea lol

      very well said

    • "TELL HER TO NOT NOT NOT use the hands on your penis"

      I would normally never post in the trash comments of something like this but I can't believe men are this dumb. This is EXACTLY why the op is having problems, and why so many girls give bad head without knowing it. You idiots have no idea what great head actually is.

      Incredible head is ALL ABOUT USING HANDS WITH THE MOUNT IN HARMONY. One hand should be used as an extension of the mouth, stimulating the part of the cock that can't be taken all in. The other hand should be used to pressure the balls, the taint, and actively pleasure as well. Men who don't understand what great head is are even worse than the girls giving bad head, you are the ones enabling it.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 8

  • well...have you tried (while she is giving head) telling her what she's doing right, what DOES feel good? don't tell her everything wrong that she does, but when you do tell her what she's doing wrong try this method: "babe, it hurts me when you ______, but it feels amazing when you ____." start the statement off with whatever pet name you call her (example: sweetie, sugar, etc.) so that what you are saying doesn't sound hostile, then tell her the bad thing, but follow it with a compliment on something she does that you like. another idea would be to be intimate by taking your hand and putting it over hers and show her what you like and what pressure to use. if it is impossible to hold a conversation like above with her and that method doesn't work, then I'd say you shouldn't let her do oral to you anymore, rethink your relationship, maybe. don't base your relationship on that only factor, though. she needs to do research on what's pleasing and what isn't and put more effort in knowing what YOU like and not what her past boyfriends liked. the only thing you can really do is talk, but don't sound accusing or mean when you say it. hope that helps :)

  • My boyfriend taught me all I know...just sit down when your not messing around and explain to her that not all guys are pleasured the same way, put it in an analysis where she will understand, like use her as an example, ask how she prefers to be played with down there then let her know that every person is unique, and some girls like d.p, others like clit action etc. etc. This should make her realize that she is being selfish by not trying things your way. Then elaborate on the things you like, and when she does something you like say "Omg babe that's amazing", tell her your not trying to offend her but this is how you prefer it, and if she continues to insist she knows what she is doing bluntly say "Obviously Not!" and zip up

  • Perhaps give her instruction while she is doing it, positive instruction, that way she doesn't get defensive.

  • Seriously, if it hurts for the love of god MAKE HER STOP. A friction burn sounds like hell on any part of the body, but somewhere that sensitive? I'm so sorry. And BITING? I'd hate my clit bit...

    She needs to listen to you. She doesn't sound like she'll take your advice or anything though. I'd just prevent her from giving you head. If she gets offended when you tell her how to give you better head then she's not going to learn.

  • grab her by the back of her head and tell her you ain't gonna come till she does it right lol

  • weird... if you have tried explaining it to her then I don't know what else to suggest. Maybe watch p*rn with her (not like a crazy one but one where there is a girl giving good head) and be like "id love it if you did that" or something

  • lol wow she's obviously not getting the picture. hmmm maybe you can kinda make it into a game and talk her through it until she gets it.

  • Show her what to do by demonstrating on her finger. Tell her you love her, but just want to try something different.


What Guys Said 1

  • Did you try talking to her? Ah dur?

    • Were you on drugs when you commented? Did you not read the part where I mentioned I explained it all to her, going as far as to class her on my anatomy. Ah dur?

      Problem solved. Thank you everyone else for your suggestions.

    • Must have missed that. My bad.

      Then I guess it's her fault for not listening.

Loading... ;