I Feel Like A Gay Guy In A Woman's Body?

[Anonymous]

I'm really confused...So I'll start from the beginning. When I was a kid, about four to seven, I thought of myself as a guy. I was attracted to males though and as far as I knew perfectly straight. I had a friend and she, also, wanted to be a guy. We'd both go by 'he' and 'him' and we'd...Uh...Put pencils and stuff in our pants because we wanted a penis like a guy. We'd dress tomboyish and everything and I guess we acted more like boys... She then moved away, but I continued to have a more male personality and I dressed pretty masculine. ...So I went though my primary school years like that, a straight girl, that dressed 'tomboyish' and would prefer to go climbing than shopping. As a few years past, I seen my old friend again time to time. She definetely doesn't want to be a 'guy' anymore...She dressed feminine and is very interested in guys. ...But I still feel I would have much prefered to be a guy. I eventually went into high school, and you could say most people label my style as 'punk' or 'emo...' Members from bands I listen to often make out even if they are the same sex...And I don't know why, but I find straight relationships...Horrible? I'd prefer to see two guys making out than a male and a female...I get turned on by gay relationships and I hate the thought of male and female together. I've always crushed on feminine guys, but never females until now. I've got a crush on a girl... She's a year above me, and I never even knew her name until she randomly added me on FaceBook and then added me on MSN. I have no idea how she got my FB, as I don't go by my real name on FB. But she got it, somehow and seemed to be really wanting to get to know me. We have really similar interests though, and agree on a lot of things... She also prefers gay relationships and stuff... BUT ANYWAYS, that's besides the point. I also crush on guys that dress feminine! ...And I like girls that dress kinda 'punky' and stuff... I'M SO CONFUSEEDD... I feel like I'm a gay guy...Seriously. I wanna dress completely male, and go out with guys, GAY guys though, BUT THAT COULD NEVER WORK BECAUSE I'M FEMALE, apparently. :S Please help me...I feel trapped.

[JustCallMeNick]

Ask yourself a few questions here.

Do you find yourself uncomfortable with the female body you're in?

Are normal female bodily functions (like getting your period) devastating? or do you feel like it's something that shouldn't be happening to you?

Do you feel sometimes that you were put in the wrong body or that you're trapped?

If you were given a choice, would you choose to be in a male's body?

Would you feel more comfortable with yourself in a guy's body?

Do you think you'd be happier if you were a guy?

If you find yourself answering "yes" to all of these, then it's most likely you're a FTM (female-to-male) transsexual. It just means that there's a discrepancy between your physical body and your mind (who you feel you are) and there's many other people out there in a similar situation.

Some people decide to just live with these feelings, but others make the decision to transition into the body they feel they're meant for. This means coming out to your friends and family as transsexual, months, even years of hormone treatment, sometimes surgery, and - something not many people think about - lots and LOTS of paperwork.

Needless to say, transitioning is a LONG and difficult process, but in the end you're closer to what you want to be. It might be a really hard thing to come to terms with, but ultimately, if it really is a question of feeling at peace with yourself or comfortable in your own body, it's not a hard choice to make.

Perhaps you would like to experiment with it a little though before you make the decision to start such a grueling process. You already mentioned that you dress yourself as a guy, so you're obviously dressing in a way that makes you more comfortable. That's good, but it's not going to relieve you of everything that's swimming around in your head. If there's someone you're really close to, it's probably time to talk to them about the way you're feeling. Anyone. A friend, a family member, a counselor, etc. If they take it well, you can ask that they start using male pronouns around you. Have them call you "he" instead of "she" and see if you like it. If you do, you can tell them that it's something you want them to keep calling you.

You should talk to your parents about the way you're feeling. If you're really serious about your feelings of being a guy, they should offer support and, hopefully, if it is ultimately something you want, get the ball rolling for gender reassignment. You should probably tell your friends so that they're not in the dark about this confusing transition, but you don't have to tell anyone else until either you're ready or you fill out the paperwork at your school that changes your gender on your records.

Not everyone is going to agree with you and you're going to have to deal with ignorant people, but just know that it'll be worth it.

I found a good site too, with many other people to talk to about this. They're very welcoming there.

link

[JustCallMeNick]

And I almost forgot: The very best of luck to you.

[Asker]

I would definitely want to be a guy, I feel I could just be me as a guy. Since I was little I'd always hate my gender and try to be male. Even if it was the littlest thing like deciding a team to be on for a game, like say boys against girls. I will have a look at the link. :) Thank you.

[JustCallMeNick]

You're welcome. I hope it helps. I know someone that's going through hormone treatment right now to become a male. It was a long time coming though and I know she - sorry - HE will be a lot happier in the end. He was flabbergasted at the sheer volume of paperwork though. xD

[05Jueey]

Thats so interesting. have you ever talked to a physchologist or a professional? It can really help

[Asker]

No, I haven't... Never had the guts to even tell anyone about how I feel. :3

[05Jueey]

Well like I said it really helps! And they will not tell anyone. Pros are trained to help you with your mental problems

[SocietysBomb]

sounds like your describing a transexual. link

[CuriousEddie]

There are certainly guys who want to be feminine, but not be with guys. You could find a guy who is interested in something like that and feminize him... dress him up... but he'd still have the penis... how would you feel about that?

And you've found a girl you like... so would you be interested in being with a girl?

Believe me, in the vast sea of people and their interests, you really aren't unique. You may not be the plain girl-next-door by any means, but you'll find someone.

[Asker]

Hm...That could work out, as long as he was okay with the fact that he'd technically be dating a gay guy on the inside. And girls...I'm much more attracted to feminine guys, but once in a while I do find one I would date. :)

[CuriousEddie]

I think you shouldn't call yourself a "gay guy". I don't know if it really describes yourself... You didn't mention wanting a sex change... There's nothing unusual about being a tomboy... Are you more dominant? I mean, when you think of sex, it is with a guy, right? When you say a more feminine guy, would you want to dress him up? Or just have him be perhaps more submissive? Would you be the dominant one, perhaps with a strap-on? Again, nothing there is really that unusual...

[Asker]

I would want a sex change, but my parents really wouldn't want me to... On the occasion a sex change has been brought up, they will say that people should just stay the same gender and they can't imagine why anyone would feel the need to change their gender. And no, I don't think I'd be the dominant one...It's just really hard to explain why I feel this way. I feel as if I was supposed to be a boy...

[CuriousEddie]

But you'd rather be with a feminine boy than a girl? Which sex organs interest you? Do you think about having vaginal sex when being with that person? Either insertion or oral? Or do you think about things like a strap-on? Or do you simply imagine yourself as a boy -- with a penis? You haven't had sex yet, right? Have you done anything sexual with either boys or girls? Do you watch p*rn, and have a preference? Sorry for all the questions. Feel free to ignore. Or respond in a message.

[Asker]

I'd rather be with a feminine boy, yes. And the penis. I usually think oral when I'm with her, and in my little fantisies I make myself male even if it's with another guy. No, I haven't. I've not really been in relationships at all, actually. And if watching p*rn, it's gay p*rn.

[Alex93]

So go Bisexual... if you went to my school id have no prob with you dressin like dat...id date you for u

[Asker]

But if I were Bi and I went out with a male I'd technically be in a straight relationship... I wanna be in a gay relationship with a guy...I feel like a gay guy. But I have no idea how that'd work out. :3

[Alex93]

hmm...well there isn't much you can do now then...when you get older id say consider getting a sex change...for now act more like a guy, make sure you wear all guys clothes, & hangout with gays more often. Just cause you can't date a gay guy doesn't mean you can't try & be one lol

[Alex93]

add me on here id be more than happy to help you out

[Asker]

I already dress the way I'd dress if I were male, basically if a boy walked into school with what I wear he'd definitely be called gay, even if he wasn't. I dress pretty unisex...Like a girl and a guy could wear it, even though nowadays a guy wearing skinny jeans with my medium spiky purple hair would be made fun of, I'd still dress that way. :3 And believe me, gay guys are hard to find where I live! I don't know any. :( Wish I did though, I could probably discuss this with him. Added you. ^-^

[Alex93]

ok...then try finding guys online...try imvu there are a lotta people on there who are gay or bi that you can talk 2...or look for a transexual dating site...its not quite what your lookin for but its not far from it

[DaveMicharl69]

I don't know HOW to help that. I don't mean to be mean or offend you, but that's just too weird & I don't know how to tell you to fix the problem, other than considering being a transy...

[DaveMicharl69]

I really DIDN'T MEAN TO OFFEND YOU. I FEEL 4 you and I CAN'T THINK OF ANOTHER SOLUTION...

[Firesparks]

If you want to dress that way it's fine n you want a male to say wear feminine clothes like dresses n skirts go for it... me personally I'll wear whatever for a girl regardless of what anyone thinks

[badazz]

poor baby, your just so confused :-\

[Dtpreek]

just remember That your happiness is what should come first. i would love to chat become friends

[Anonymous]

The condition you've described points toward your being a transsexual.