I was molested by my step-dad?

[Anonymous]

this is really hard for me to talk about I've never told a human soul and I was hoping I could let it out here cus I need help so please no mean comments and bare with me for the long story and sorry if to many details.. my step dad came in the family when I was 2 raised me like I was his own daughter he gave me everything I asked for and I actually felt loved and didn't seem bothered that he wasn't my dad by blood because he's always been there for me.well as I grew older his interest in me didn't seem daughter father anymore he started staring at me as if I was meat or something. then one night came along I was 14 and I was scared because I heard noises by my window (yes I was a scared 14 year old ) so I went to my parents room and my stepdad was awake so I told him and we went to my room..then he sat in bed with me..all of a sudden he told me to sit on his lap.i didn't think much of it so I just did. then he started to rub on me like my thigh and he moved upper and upper every time to the point where he touched my private while he had one hand over my breast and started to rub it. I got scared I was in shock that I couldn't say anything I just shrugged him away and got up. I stayed quite and scared my brother and sister that were in the same room were gonna wake up and see what was going on . so I sat on the bed next to him and didn't sit on his lap then he grabbed my hand and started to suck on my fingers I was terrified I didn't know why he was doing this..he then grabbed my other hand and placed it over his thing and moved my hand so I was stroking it in a way I quickly pulled away. I was scared and I told him I was going back to bed so I got in my bed and he tried to get in with me! I told him I didn't want him in the room anymore and I was okay for the night. he left and the next day I was still trying to process what happened. I didn't think much of it but now that I think about it it was molestation! I haven't told anybody because now I'm 16 and I still live with him. almost a year ago I was in the shower and I asked him to pass me my tooth brush cause I brush my teeth in the shower lol so I open the sliding door just a tiny bit enough to get my tooth paste but he opens it and sticks his whole head in there and decides to give it to me like that! I was in shock that he had seen me he acted like whatever! I don't know if I'm making a big deal but all I know is that I felt uncomfortable with that..nothing has happened since then I just caught him staring at me a couple of times like my butt.. I love my mom and she was molested by her grandpa and her mom by her brother so its happened in the family and so my mom always tells me to tell her if my stepdad ever does anything to me but I can't tell her. I live in a family of 7! we need him to take care of us my mom can't work so we would not be able to take care of each other financially and my mom has 5 children there is no way she'll find another husband and I don't want her to live alone :(.idk what to do I'm scared

[Anonymous]

hey I just found your article and related to it. I recently heard my older sister was sexually molested by my stepfather whom I love very much. He never showed any signs of sexual abuse besides cheating on my mother in there 14 year relationship. My sister didn't live with us that much but she was close to our family because she lived with my grandparents.

This supposedly happened year ago when she was young. I am 23 now and getting married in a foreign country and my father is suppose to attended. A couple months before the wedding, my sister and I have gone close. Maybe due to the fact I'm a little lonely here and wanted someone to talk to you. She became like a best friend in a way. In the past, everyone doubted her thinking she was a bad child. She got caught stealing, went to a foster care for a year, and wanted to live with my grandparents.

I was young so I didn't realize why she was bad. Now she tells me she has secrets to bring to her grave. I'm very curious and made her tell me. First I was shocked, devastated, and believed her. I didn't want any contact with my father at all. But she never came forward to anyone, no family members, police, or even her own husband. She got pregnant at 19 and has two kids now at the age of 26.

So I'm confused now. My father is calling non stop to ask me about wedding plans and I'm to afraid to talk to him. Like what will I say? I shouldn't confront him right ...or should I? You confronted your mother and she kicked him out and bring him to court. But my sister is too afraid to tell anyone because she thinks its shameful and it was a long time ago...who'd believe her?

But my family is important to me ...half sister or not I love her. BUT is she telling the truth? I don't know what to do... I am trying to persuade her to tell the Police even though it happened a long time ago. She still doesn't want to. I believe in justice and want to make it right but opening up this "family secret" is bad isn't it? She moved on, he moved on, and he doesn't live close to any of my family. I hardly see him for the past couple years.

What should I do? I hope you get to read this even though you posted this over a year ago. I cannot ever know how she feels but I do believe justice and making things right. Is it worth to make it official in my family and have everyone look at her like an abused child? Or they wouldn't even believe her cause she's very private and a liar at times. But something this dramatic wouldn't be a white lie to not have him at my wedding when she never had one. Her family past away when she was young too and she never got to talk to him. Please help me.

[Asker]

she may have not been close to many people and the fact that she only told you she must really trust you..telling someone you've been molested is not easy sometimes it comes out and you tell the least expected person but I think she trusts you ..i think if you aren't comfortable with it confront your stepdad about it of course first make sure that's alright with your sister..just be there for her that's what she needs right now<3 if she needs help confronting him then help her

[Asker]

sorry for the late reply I am starting to get on again and I hope you read this<3

[Anonymous]

One, don't have him in the bathroom when you're showering. That's just a giant no. Secondly, you need to tell someone, especially your mom. It may happened over a year ago, but it still did and obviously you can't get over it and now you're scared for your sister. Tell someone.

[Asker]

but my family how are we gona get money? how is my mom gona take care of us we have no family here.. :/

[Opinion Owner]

How are you going to feel if it happens to your sister or to you again? You're mom will find a way. And plus you can get a job (even if you don't want to) you can to help.

[Asker]

i wuld be crushed I love my sister but in a way I think he wuldnt do it to her because that's his actual daughter ya kno? but your still right im only 16 and I've tried to look for a job before but nothing i think I am going to tell my mom I just don't know how to break it to her.

[Opinion Owner]

I would do it in a note personally if something like that ever happened to me. I would write "dear mom, I have no clue how to break this to you but I'm just going to say it. over a year ago, your husband, my stepfather, molested me and I've been to scared to tell you and ruin our family" and just be there when she reads it. but make sure he's not around.

[Asker]

thats a good idea! because I cnt imagine sayin it out loud honestly! :/ I think I ay do that it seems a lot easier.thnx <3

[Opinion Owner]

I wish the best of luck to you and your family.

[Asker]

thnx so much means a lot <3

[kmhco]

You need to tell your mom what happened. She will understand what you are going through because she went through it herself. Things will work out in the long run, but right now you need to do the right thing. That is prevent what happened to you from happening to your sister.

[Anonymous]

I was molested by a gay guy when I was only in 7th grade. My folks were divorced at the time so it was just my mom and ma and my three sisters. This guy was a friend of my mom so sometimes after they had been out at a party or dinner he would sleep on the couch downstairs. I had only just reached puberty at that point and was nowhere near having a girlfriend and having sexual relations yets. One night this guy snuck into my room and I knew he was there and I was terrified and I froze (couldn't say anything and couldn't move, you know?).

He crawled under my covers and pulled down my underwear all the way off. I wish I could have screamed out to my mom but I didn't and I blame myself for that. I just let him do what he was doing and I didn;t even try to stop him. I just remember the feeling of his mouth on my penid and how good it felt but at the same time how wrong it was because I was just a kid! I ended up ejaculating my young boy cum in his mouth and I heard him swallow it. That was all he really wanted was my cum, I figured out later.

That whole initiation into sex and the way it happened and who it was really messed me up and screwed up my perspective about sex.

Would like to talk to you more about it you want?

And do you know how

[BeastofMyself]

I would've honestly say gimme your ass next Time to him

[Calgarydirty69]

same shit happened to me years ago, you can't change the past I fucked the guys wife, you should too, it will bring your sexuallity back in your power

[Calgarydirty69]

yeah h, I didn't stop my abuser either

[IAmAnon123]

You have to tell your mom. I know it's scary because you don't know what will happen to your family, but you can't let him keep acting this way. Sooner or later he's going to take it even further with you, or your sister, and it will cause extremely serious emotional problems that will probably never leave you. Please tell your mom before you or your sister get really hurt by this, if you haven't already.

Tell her in whatever way you feel comfortable. Like the anonymous poster below said, use a note if you have to, just tell her as soon as possible.

[Asker]

yeah I know I have to tell..i just dnt wana split up the family..but I think its for the best because if he does anything to my sister I won't b able to live with myself..thnx so much for the help <3

[iamhelper]

Nothing will happen to your sister,. if the court warn him.. he will not even dare to stare at you and your sister... and take him to the court... if you are proved right in the court.. he will be jailed for 3-4 yeats... and in that period of time he can't do anything.. and after coming back from jail he won't even dare to

[MILLIONDOLLARSMILE]

Just tell your mom via text if your scared (it's easier to type things out, as you may have noticed), or if you don't have the heart.. tell the police.

Don't try and do it just do it.. I pray you have an happy life.

- One Love (No pun intended)

[Asker]

thnx so much this gave me a lot more confidence<3

[MILLIONDOLLARSMILE]

;) No.. Thank You. Just promise yourself you'll do it.

[Asker]

lol xD .i told my mom already

[AdamBH]

add me as a friend too. I'd like to help you :) I have a little experience in that sort of thing but nothing as much as you at all, but I can help in a few ways I think some others here might not be able to, so I'm here if you like :) I know it might be weird because I'm a boy, so I understand if you don't want to. Good luck anyway.

[Asker]

haha lol I will :)..boy girl doesn't matter I just need help thank you so much <3

[AdamBH]

okay :)

[Asker]

i sent you a request! and message >.< lol

[AdamBH]

I got a new friend request today, but no message :)

[Asker]

crap ill send it again lol >.<

[AdamBH]

Got it now ^^

[Asker]

yay! :D lol

[IAmAnon123]

@ the update.

You are very brave for doing this. It's going to be scary and it's going to be difficult (especially court), but just remember that you're doing the right thing, and you're protecting yourself and your sister. I don't know you, but I am honestly very proud of you for going through with this. Stay strong and everything will be OK :)

[Asker]

thnx so much! I feel a lot better and proud that other people are proud lol <3 do you think I'll b able to sned him to jail though you think its all worth it?

[IAmAnon123]

You're more than welcome. Jail time is definitely a possibility, and yes, of course I think it's all worth it. I fully support this endeavor, just keep at it and don't lose hope for the future :)

[Asker]

if not jail then what? O.o and what if he doesn't go to jail and comes bk ot somethin ..im scared :/

[IAmAnon123]

I don't think you need to worry about that. I can't say for sure whether or not he'll be convicted (obviously) but he probably will. Even if he doesn't, I sincerely doubt your mom will allow him back into your lives.

[Asker]

yeah that's true but I just feel guilty that I ruined my boothers ad sister lives because now they dnt have a dad :/

[IAmAnon123]

Please don't feel guilty. No amount of providing for the family earns him the right to do what he did, and your siblings' need for a father does not outweigh your right to feel safe in your own home. Besides, you didn't ruin brother's and sister's lives, HE did the moment he decided to condemn himself by violating you. You haven't done a single thing to feel guilty about.

[Asker]

wow that really hit me a lot lol..thnx a lot <3 I feel a lot better..ur rite they dnt need a father like him anyway rite?

[IAmAnon123]

Exactly. You're all better off without him. Even if it's hard for your siblings now, in time, I promise you they will understand. Just say brave and you'll all make it through this just fine :)

[bluejayway]

I am so proud of you...you are so courageous.

I know you have what it takes to get through this. You have done so much more then many people have the guts to do, and even though it's scary, you'll definitely overcome it.

Keep your head up.

[Asker]

yeah thanks so much a feel a lot bettter I thought it wulda gone worse .

[bluejayway]

If you don't mind, can you friend me. I want to talk to you out of this post thing.

[Asker]

yeah lol ill send you a request

[amatuer_zombie]

good you did the right thing,nothing to be scared of

[Asker]

it was a little scar y >.< lol but yeah thnx (:

[amatuer_zombie]

REPORT it to the authorities...tht is unacceptable behaviour...i can understand your situation but by staying numb you are inviting more trouble.

[Asker]

yeah I kno I'm just trying to see whens the right time to tell..

[amatuer_zombie]

this the right time,tell before its too late

[Asker]

okay I will

[Calgarydirty69]

tell all to me. the same shit happened to me dannydavies322@gmail. com I had a horny wife, who I woke up to naked in my bed I'm OK

[Zygum]

You must tell your mom about the behavior of that man. She will think some solution of this matter, otherwise you maybe raped

[Calgarydirty69]

nobody is going to do shit, I had to get my own way out of my hell, just get drunk!

[futurestripper]

@Calgarydirty69 Only thing my mom did was stayed married to my abuser (dumb bitch) and he stop when I was 12 or 13

[Calgarydirty69]

I too was sexually abused I use to babysit for a couple I woke up next to his naked wife on several occasions she use to walk around the house naked, but you can't rape the willing now being 38 it still haunts me, I did suck his dick, it was that, or fuck his passed out wife they turned me into an alcoholic I was just trying to escape, and they ALWAYS had booze I feel sorry for the kids I use to babysit, their the reason I did what I did I was saving them from being abused

[JayNick]

Ok hun, what you need to do is tell your mom first( SHE CAN FIND ANOTHER MAN,THERE IS SOMEONE FOR EVERYONE) if he molested you, you can sit in fear, or you can do something, your mom defff does not need to be with a guy like that, either way he's gonna rot in hell(just sayin) report to the authorities, and have that bastard jailed, it will be OK gurl, no need to be afraid.

[Asker]

i told my mom! she kicked his ass outta the house and cursed the hell outta him :/

[phalaenopsis]

You need to tell your mom!

If you don't want to talk to her directly, try to find help from an anonymous group or helpline but DO SOMETHING!

[Loveyourself20]

I totally understand I went through literally the exact same thing. It's hard cause its a very scary situation I was molested by my step dad from 6 years old till I was 16. When I told my mom she didn't believe me nobody in my family would believe me it was really sad and emotional for me and luckily my mom left him for another man but I'm 20 years old now and I still have trauma.

[Takemyadvice]

so What happened to the rest of your family when he started going to court how did that affect them honestly if you love him don’t testify against him even if your mom makes you he’s gonna die in prison I’m sure he had an uncontrollable desire for you for a long time that he tried to hide because it’s known as wrong by our society but then he had the opportunity and took it one day maybe he felt regret but would your family would have been better if you just kept it a secret and just took the bullet and dealt with it or did your family actually grow to be stronger after you told let me know

[Humnz]

this is crazy, how the fu** is somebody going to make up a story they were touched. Dumb. Those folks have problems displaying other people's wrongs. Its not lies. Those molesters are private people keep you captivated. Serious. They are not lying those guys, men love touching kids. Like you may love to sleep with someone or let them fondle you when your older. The difference is there under aged. And they get away with it. Please listen. They need you to.

[Anonymous]

i developed early & had SUPER bad periods so mom put me on birth control when i was 12. i was 4'9", 89 lbs, 34B/22/34 & my stepdad started flirting wif me whenever mom wasn't around. 1 nite when she was gone i caught him jerking off & he was HUGE. i admit i stared & watched awhile before runnin off to my room. he followed still naked n sat next to me on the bed. i honestly couldnt stop staring at his penis cuz id never seen 1 so big (ya i was already sexually active) & i was scared. he took my hand & put it on his penis & used it to stroke. he got super hard & he put his hand on the back of my head & pushed me down. he told me to suck it & i was terrified so i did it. he grew to like 10" & i stopped bein scared & got horny which made me RLLY start gettin into it & he kept sayin in an amazed voice "GOOD GIRL!" after while my mouf got tired n i stopped. then he took off my pj's as i kept tellin him not to, & he ate my pussy. I was scared again n kept sayin stop but then i had an orgasm & i let him keep goin cuz it felt RLLY good after that orgasm. then he mounted on top of me in missionary & i started cryin as he pushed inside me. at 1st it hurt so bad (even tho he was tryin 2 be gentle) for what seemed like forever but only 10 mins passed & i was still cryin. somethin unexpected happened then... i guess i stretched out cuz then it felt AMAZING! im ashamed & embarassed to say that i told him "don't stop!" & vulgar things like "Fuck me!" & "you're fucking me SO GOOD Daddy!" we did it for a couple hrs that night & after he told me i was his "free use daughter" from then on & made me sign a piece of paper sayin if i didn't have sex when & where he wanted it would be "breach of contract" & i could go to jail. i was pissed cuz i now WANTED him to do me & he didn't have to threaten me. so from 12 to now (im 16) we've done it every way & everywhere. when i was 13 we were doin it in a closed park & a cop caught us & said he was gonna arrest us if i didn't do him too, so i did & cried the whole time. then when i was 14, my stepdaddy took me to a place he called the trap house where they talked me into smoking some crystal lookin stuff & it made me rlly horny & i had sex w/all the guys there & all who came over & 1 was even my history teacher! so i'm GLAD my stepdaddy molested me cuz I've head the best orgasms EVAH!

[Anonymous]

Wow, this is really disturbing, and I truly feel for you. But you do have to tell your mum, so that your mum can then leave your step-dad, and maybe even take this to the place, I know it's scary, and I know it's hard, but you have to do it. If you need to ask any more questions, feel free to add me, I'm always here to help :)

[Asker]

yeah I kno thanks so much for the advice..im planning to tell my mom this week..and ill add forsure :) thnx

[Opinion Owner]

np :)