Guys and girls, is my boss being pervy?

well I work at an ice cream shop on everyday except for wed. and sun. my boss was nice at first but things got sorta weird I guess. like he always brings up that his sisters kids go to my school so maybe he can stop by sometime at a game (I cheer) which I didn't think much of until he kept talking about it. he kept saying how he wishes the girls who went to his school look like the ones that go to school now. and that he always dated cheerleaders in hs blah blah. then he asked "so do you wanna switch your work days so you can have Saturdays and Fridays off cause I'm sure you prob have plenty of guys who would love to take you out" which I don't and I told him its fine I'm not even allowed to date yet. and I don't remember exactly what he said but it was something weird like "oh that's good we all know what they want anyway" and I awkwardly just stood there. then he asked me the question "so have you ever even had sex before" I answered, the answer was no. and he's like that's good you should wait. and that's when I started getting really creeped out cause I asked my friend if that was weird of him and he said it totally was and I felt super awkward. and he's always telling me I look nice and he's glad I'm here cause it gives him something to think about while he gets through his day. and I catch him looking at me in ways he probably shouldn't be looking at me. I mean he's probably like 30 just your average American guy blond blue eyes not really my type but he can get girls I mean he's not ugly and I'm pretty sure he may even have a girlfriend. he can also be sorta sexist and I don't know if he's being a jerk or flirting, he will say things like "its cute how little you know, its OK I guess that makes you a girl" or when I was cleaning the tables before closing he said something like " a woman who knows her job, your gonna make someone a very good wife" and he's called me dumb in many different ways :/ and about two weeks ago he got really touchy. like hugging me goodbye, putting his hand on my arm, getting too close behind me, touching my butt when he hugged me that sort of stuff. and I mean even my friend jess was like wow your boss kept looking at you when I went down there. I'm not sure maybe I'm crazy he never actually did anything wrong its just the little things he keeps doing are really making me not even wanna work there. I mean I don't need the money but I do need the work experience but I guess I can get that in other ways but if we do a certain amount of hours we get credits for school. I'm not sure is it just me? like am I crazy? what do you guys think?
Updates:
+1 y
hes about 27-36 I wanna say
+1 y
i think I just need to ask some of the other workers about him, maybe get one of them to report him.
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • The trick is finding a way to shut him down without losing your job. You want to get the message across, but you don't want him to feel insulted, or to fear for *his* job.

    You could that the direct approach, very carefully: "It's really flattering that you're into me, but I just don't feel that way about you." Or, you can invent an imaginary boyfriend, even have him show up to the job from time to time to pick you up.

    You should always feel free to say "I'm not comfortable discussing that", then to change the subject. He's taking advantage of your good nature, and you need to gently but firmly put limits on what he can get away with. The same goes for how and when he touches you; you have every right, and even the responsibility, to keep your distance so that he doesn't get the wrong idea.

  • That would qualify as sexual harassment and " creating a hostile work environment". If this is true, the first thing you need to do is to document dates, times, exactly who said what to whom and contact the company's Human Resources dept. and tell them this story.

    At the very least, they will make it stop. They may very well get rid of your manager, too.

    If they don't, or if you take it to them and the problem gets worse somehow, contact your state's Labor Relation Board.

    If the company doesn't make this stop -like right now, they leave themselves vulnerable to civil legal action that could cost them a ton of $.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Everything you describe there sounds really creepy to me!... He's clearly hitting on you and making inappropriate remarks as well as sexist ones! He may be harmless, but I wouldn't be taking any chances and perhaps you'd be better off looking for alternative work experience? As you describe it, he's started getting a little physical with the hugging and touching and the 'have you had sex' question is totally out of line! If it were me, I would feel really uncomfortable with this guy... Especially if I was ever alone with him, which I would always try to avoid! Depending how creeped out you are, you could stick it out for now, but I would be looking for another job! For now I would say be nice with him as normal, but always be kinda aware and alert when you're around him!... Good luck!... :o)

    • Thanks for awarding me best answer!... :o)

  • He is totally being inappropriate. Omg let your parents know so they can help you. He should not be acting that way towards you and you should try to find the courage to tell him it makes you uncomfortable. Also, DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Anything like comments, etc. document all of it because this could possibly become a legal issue. He is creating a hostile work environment. I'm not a lawyer but talk to your parents and see about legal counsel and what your rights are. You have done nothing wrong, it's all him so don't feel scared. NEVER BE ALONE WITH THIS GUY.

  • This guy is definitely a creeper! Report him, that is just disgusting and an abuse of his position. You don't need to take that from him, he is being perverted. If I were you, I would find a new job with no pervert for a boss S:

    I definitely think you should ask some of the other workers about him, if there are more people, you will have a stronger case to get this guy to stop doing what he is doing.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

7 17
  • ya he is a creepy perv. you should report him

  • No job is worth this. Talk to your school, talk to someone who can intervene. It is vital that this guy's inappropriate behavior is stopped before it gets any worse. He clearly thinks he can act this way and get away with it.

    If your teachers know, they will almost certainly have a legal process to follow, and at least you will have no problem with school credits.

  • (Hands victoriaisbella a can O mace labeled "PERV-A-WAY")

    Worry not , for the time draws near...I have trained you to the best of my abilities...

    (insert bad, blotchy kung fu music here)

    For the time shall soon come, and you will know when to use this young grasshopper...

    /2cents

  • Okay ew, I would talk to your parents or someone older that you trust, he sounds like a total perv and next thing you know you could be stuck closing up shop just you and him and one thing could lead to another.. CREEPY, I think i;d consider quitting if I were you that's not okay!

  • Well... you are pretty cute lol. I wouldn't doubt it.

  • he is pervy and creepy

    tht sh*t is so not appropriate

    and you nt saying anything is almost like encouraging him

    i think you should at least say something or find another job

    sexist comments aren't OK and the other stuff is jus wrong

    creeper older dude preying on pretty young underage girls

  • I think it's obvious, yes he's crossing that professional line. Also I assume he's older by a bit than you? It says you are under 18, which is inappropriate for someone in his position. Tell him that he needs to stop his behavior because it's inappropriate and making you uncomfortable.

  • The butt touching is not OK. He's a creep.

  • If I were you I'd be colder then an ice creme cone to him, and if that didn't work quit and file sexual harassment charges. has he every hugged or touched you in front of anyone or said anything weird that someone has heard?

  • i can't believe you have to ask this, common sense should tell you he's a perv.

    • update: yes you should, his behavior is inappropriate.

  • holy sh*t. dudes a creeper. you can actually have a lawsuit against him if you want. tell him to back the f*** off unless he wants one.

  • yeah he is creeping.. he will slowly try to ask you out.. I had a guy give me a scholarship. and soon after he asked me out! creepy I ignored him.

    • i hope you took that money$$ girl ;)

    • lol I took it! he tried after he gave it to me

  • total jackass, predator type guy. just tell him you don't want him touching you and that you don't feel comfortable around him when he does. its not worth it at your age, who knows what he's capable of. especially if he starts stalking you or something

  • If he touched your butt and it didn't bother you then, I have no idea why you're asking this question now, But he's clearly trying to seduce you. Judging by your picture I can definitely say you look pretty. I would show caution if I was you. In fact, If I was you, I would try casually bringing up a boy I like in conversation. Maybe he will back off a little, but I honestly doubt it. The behavior you described him exhibiting is very aggressive. But yeah...he sounds sex crazed if you ask me.

  • Seriously...this dude is sexually harassing u.

    IF you want to report him...make sure that you VERBALLY tell him that these actions are making you uncomfortable to the point of quitting.

    THEN if he continues...then you can report him. You have my support. Although you are good-looking...that's not an invitation for creepiness, right? :-/

  • Perv. Your boss doesn't need to know if you have had sex or not.

  • Whoa, that dude is a f*cking creep, that's already five cases of sexual harassment in the workplace!

    Any sort of question that makes you feel uncomfortable, staring, sexist comments, and unnecessary physical contact (hugging, etc) in the workplace is considered to be sexual harassment. If I were you, I'd have reported that bastard long ago!

  • Dude sounds like a creeper. Be careful around him and just humor him tell him its nice that he's interested in you. But your not that type of girl and that he should stop, if he doesn't than you can always report him but then you would lose your credits for school.

  • do you like him?

    • no I think he's creepy

    • well if he wasn't creepy would you like him?

  • how old is he

  • Show More (4)