In general, guys are emotionally closed off in almost all situations, because, let's be real, society isn't kind to guys who get emotional all the time. Plus, many jobs/occupations require men to be in very dangerous situations, and if they got emotional all the time, they couldn't get the work done.
Women are "allowed" and expected by society to be more open emotionally, because they are that way by nature. Women have more oppertunity to be emotional in a wider range of situations, and they don't associate that openness with just sex.
Guys do. Sex is one of the few times that guys are emotionally open and vulnerable, and so it isn't surprising that guys tend to associate that with sex. It's what they know, and it's easy to forget that girls tend to be able to separate sex and intimacy more easily.
Both genders need understanding in this area. Girls need to understand that the guy is not just being a horny pervert, but is trying to be intimate, and guys need to learn that there are other ways to be inimate, like cuddling and touching non-sexually, or just listening to her and paying full attention to her. And inevitably, some people will be better at this than others.
you made some great points
it's NOT true. It's a stereotype that men only experience intimacy through sex. It's a steroetype that women "know how" to be intimate and that men do not! To me, intimacy is the result of trust, and trust comes through talking about inner experience--what emotion I am having, what I am thinking about right now...learning to be authentic and vulnerable with each other. Lots of people do not experience much intimacy in their lives, even with their parents, so they may not be skilled at doing it..it takes practice, just like any other skill worth doing, like reading or learning to ride a bike. BTW, intimacy is not just about expressing love and fun emotions, it's about expressing anger, fear, and those emotions in a respectful way. All those things help develop trust, and when you trust somebody, you can relax, and "feel connected" or "feel intimate."
I think with men in our culture, especially with young men, being intimate is feared because it is equated with being weak. I've learned that knowing my emotions, thoughts, and feelings makes me a strong man!
I second what this man has said. All guys out there better take a page from his book and memorize it.
Well said;) (To add) People often say guys fear being intimate,because it is seen as weak. Women get the same message--with an extra bind. If we are intimate, we are weak, because we are women. If we are NOT intimate, we can still be seen as weak-because we are women, as well as 'crazy' because we are not intimate- like a woman should be. A) Do not be intimate as it is weak. (You are craZy not to be intimate, as you are a woman.) OR B) Be intimate, as you ARE naturally weak, as you are a Woman.
Well said
Intimacy means different things to men and women and to the human race in general.
Personally I feel intimate with my man when I feel that he is listening to me, that he understands my moods and knowing that he loves me and thinks about me. For me it is not about sex.
To my boyfriend, intimacy means sex. To him, making love to me is his way of SHOWING me that he loves me, how much he loves/desires me. I would prefer him to touch my neck and shoulders and to trail his fingers up and down my back when we're cooking, wacthing TV etc, this means more to me than giving me an orgasm for example - which I can do myself anyway.
There's no right or wrong answer, you should look to answer this by having the conversation with all past and future partners. You'll come to your own conclusion soon enough.
Intimacy to me is that nonsexual connection people share... The more intimate you are with someone the more you trust and want to be with them... It entails sharing deep dark secrets, embarrassing memories, and having a shoulder to cry on. Stuff you don't just share with anybody. I may sound like a guy here, but sex can be intimate too. My guy feels strongly about this. it's like sharing a moment with someone so private and important that everything about it makes it intimate, from the way he kisses you to the way he looks deeply into your eyes.
nice...!
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!It is worring how many guys here 'intimacy' and think sex!
Personally it is a connection you have with another person which is close to ESP. In intimate times nothing is hidden and honesty is 100%. It's relaxed and not rushed, its cuddling, caressing and kissing. Its just the 2 of you thinking only of each other. Perhaps above all it is selfless.
I feel intimate when I'm holding a girl, no matter if its sex or cuddling. I feel so close to her. it feels so good. I will never understand what's with guy not wanting to cuddle. I love cuddling, more than girls do.
u can have intimacy with men.
Intimacy comes from the latin word meaning "in-most" It means emotional close-ness to me.
very good ;)
intimacy is more friendly flirting compared to more aggressive flirting
sharing secrets, holding hands, being naked together, making passionate love ; )
i think intamacy is a feeling of shared closness like your brains are connecting to each other I'm not sure how to explain it really more like you are sharing each others mental energy I guess
Romance like poems and stuff
Emotional connection
Romance
Well, it might sound weird but the only person I've ever felt really close to was a girl I dated in high school. She died, and I never let go. I think being with someone as they die is probably the closest form of intimacy.
It made me realize a lot about life, that things are messed up. That good doesn't always win, and that the world isn't fair. That if God exists, he's a cruel tyrant that stands condemned by his own law and has abandoned his own children to the evil of a world that he created. It made realize, that I hate this God and that his son died for "my sins" is not enough. Eternal life is not enough, and the "love" of that God is a self-serving hypocrisy afforded by a being so grossly out of touch with the suffering of the world he created that he presumes to judge our imperfections in complete negligence of his own.
sorry to hear about your girlfriend. its a hard way to learn things. I feel that way about my brother sometimes. he died from cancer 2 months after he was in remission. we thought he beat it and he could live and watch his baby grow up. she was 4 months old when he passed away. I don't really believe in religion because of it. it's hard after seeing these things. but your answer does makes sense to me.
When I've brought a woman to a powerful orgasm so many times that she says she's exhausted and needs to stop (:
is that intimacy to you?
Yeah but I've only been with 1 girl and after we had dated for 3 years. We've been dating since we were both 17 and we're 24 now (:
so sex is intimacy to you?
when a girl gives something to you that she hasn't shared with other men
u can have intimacy with men.
it means, just the 2 of you in your own little bubble
intamicy means to me... quality time with my wife, time away from the world, just the two of you... and yes, that does mean sex too. The main thing, is just time alone with each other, doing things together, making each other happy...
u can have intimacy with men.
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