Being sexually obsessed with someone: how do you stop it?

[Anonymous]

I am obsessed with this guy. Ever since I met him, I want him. Sexually mainly. There was a strong sexual tension between the two of us but every time he was getting too near, I would push him away because he was taken and was known as a cheater. So while we were in the same classes, nothing ever happened though there was obvious attraction with both of us running hot and cold. The year ended and we moved away. Now it's been more than a year that I still fantasize about him and can not help but year for him. The problem is: he's still taken and now he even has a child with his girlfriend. But knowing this doesn't seem to put a stop to my obsession. I believe that the reason why I obsess so much (though now in a more healthy way that I used to right after we parted) is because I am not sure what his feelings are. I know he has a girlfriend and that he now has a family with her. But the fact that she is a girl he cheated on, that they had a child really early (I don't think it was planned) and that I have very vivid memory of him showing interest in me keeps me wondering what his true feelings are, though I know this is now a no way situation. Oh and also I haven't seen him ever since so the onl memories I have of our interaction are from that tme... Sometimes I go as far as blaming myself for pushing him away out of fear that he might play me and use me just like another girl and I wonder how would have things evolved if I had let my brain trust my instincts. I then try to reason myself by telling myself that I had all the reason not to trust my gut and his interest signals since he was in a relationship and had already cheated on her, came back to her and she had forgave him. So yeah, my point is, I am obsessed wth him sexually and I sill fantasize about him a lot and I don't think it is really healthy. I do know though that a relationship with him is never gonna happen. So how do I stop being sexually hooked on someone I can not have? Is it even healthy? (I read somewhere that it could be healthy when done right..?) And does it ever happen to you guys too?

[l-hedoniste]

When I'm sexually obsessed with someone, I usually f*ck their brains out. I can't tell you how excellent a plan this is.

He works for you. He's turning your crank. Your body is telling you "Him! Him! Get that one!" This is normal. This is natural. This is the way things are supposed to be, a loud Yes from way down deep. The thinking, the doubt, the judging yourself, *that's* your problem, not the good stuff.

A girl once told me, "the butterflies are always right." This is a good thing that's happening. Go with it.

[NonchalantBro]

Maury Povich