Sexual Health
+1 y

If your girlfriend kissed a girl would you consider it cheating?

It was my birthday last night so it got a little crazy at the club. My best friend is a lesbian and we were dancing together (just having a good time). She kept telling me I look super hot and she leaned over and kissed me...and being caught up in the moment and with the help of a little alcohol...I kissed back. We weren't making out or anything and no I'm not a lesbian by any means...it just kinda happened lol. Now, I feel bad though Because I don't know if my boyfriend would be really hurt by this. I hope not. It didn't mean anything. I don't dance with others guys or anything like that. My boyfriend has met her and knows she's my best friend. Have I done something really wrong? Or am I just being ridiculous?
Updates:
+1 y
Ok (: everything is fine. I told him what happened and he started laughing and said "and I missed it?! Was there some tongue action?" lmao...I knew I loved him for a reason. Thanks for all y'alls help at easing my mind!
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Most Helpful Guys

  • its kind of a weird situation...he may feel less "manly"...why? well you kissed another girl, he's probably wondering why? what's wrong with the way he kisses, do you like him anymore...

    any kind of action with another person in a monogammy relationship is considered cheating...

    if he made out with another guy you'd probably call him gay, its a weird situation with a girl on girl vs a guy on guy there really is no comparison...

    anyways, remind him that you love him, if it bothers him then you need to respect that and if you can't and you like making out with other girls and don't see it as a big deal then you need to find a guy who feels the same way..

    we are all different...btw alcohol isn't a good enough excuse so don't use that when you tell him...just say it happened before you knew what was going on...

    either way this is a must to tell him, he needs to know, because if he finds out from someone else all that trust that is built up, will be lost...

    but if you ask me...same sex or not, its still cheating...i wouldn't be as hurt, as if it was another dude...but I'd still ask myself a ton of questions in my head and trying to figure out how it got to where it did...

    hope this helps

  • For me it would depend on how far the relationship was the trust factor etc. But knowing that it could've been avoided (him being there) I would lean more towards while it may be cheat-esque (think how would you feel if he kissed a dude at his birthday party. Don't try and justify it just take the raw thought of "if my boyfriend kissed a dude how would I feel.) Because no matter what you tell him the initial thing he's gonna here is "I kissed a girl". I would definitely say if I was told and then measures were taken to prevent this from happening again id be fine. A little hurt but nothing a little night all about me wouldn't solve:p lol. I would definitely tell him though because he doesn't need to find out via the grapeline or it'll just make matters worse. You also need to be willing to accept any restrictions(logical ones) that he wants to place due to his trust may waver a little or he may not care. Keep me updated I guess lol.

    Hope it Helps:)

    • it does thank you...and I will post an update

Most Helpful Girls

  • I think kissing when it doesn't mean something can be something a relationship can get over.

    Kissing someone because you have feelings for them is different, regardless of the gender of the ...shall we call them the kiss-ee lol...

    so was it meaning les or not?

    you might not think your lesbian/bi...but only you can work that out.

    Be sure of whether it was meaningless or not in your head and then confront your boyfriend.

    Make sure you tell him, if that girl kissed you, she may have feelings for you. Leading her to become jealous of your boyfriend...and jealous leads to people spilling what happened on nights out to split people up!

    • i know for a fact I'm not a lesbian...like I said...i was pretty buzzed. and she was wasted. I think more than anything it was just an alcoholic kiss.

  • A. You were drinking

    B. It was your birthday, where was he?

    C. If he is upset with you kissing another girl, he needs to grow a pair .. guys normally think its hot.

    D. If he is upset make it up to him (; kiss him and turn it into a play session, only pleasing him.

    Tell him you thought about doing it all night long. Things to turn him on be sincere.

    • he refusees to go to the club with me /:

    • In my opinion then it is fine... if he were there would it have happened?

    • hell no! because I would have been dancing with him...

    • Show All

  • I would consider it cheating (or at least out of line) if my boyfriend kissed another guy.

    • i think most people consider it something completely different if a guy kisses another guy lol

    • I agree in general, but in terms of what is considered cheating in a relationship, I feel it would be hypocritical to assume that it's for girls to kiss girls but not for guys to kiss guys. I would consider it all cheating unless my boyfriend specifically told me it was fine with him if I kiss girls. And I know for a fact that it's NOT fine with him, so you see, everyone is different.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 13

  • Not at all, if he is like me. I, in fact, sometimes fantasize my girl friend kissing some hot chick.

  • Depends on how understanding he is really. It may depend on the type of kiss too and who had feelings behind it. Sure your friend might be attracted to you so it's not like two straight women kissing.

    • but it's not like two lesbians kissing either...and for the record...she kissed me...i just didn't pull away /: lol

    • There are no technicalities when it comes to feelings.

    • i'm not a lesbian lol and I have no feelings for her...i know that for a fact

  • I'm not big on exclusive relationships, so I don't need to deal with cheating. If I did, it would depend on whether she asked me first; I'm cool with a LOT, but I can't stand a sneak.

  • It wouldn't matter to me, but some guys can be weird about these things. Especially if they are insecure, and think now that you've just doubled the amount of people in the world they have to beat to win your affection.

    Personally, I'd find it hot, but that's probably because I'm a perv.

    If you had kissed a male friend, I wouldn't consider it cheating if you explained it just like that. But then, I dunno, I'd maybe be keeping my eye on you two... it would depend if I thought of your friend as a potential threat or not.

  • I would really prefer if you came to me with that first. And it would cost you a lot less worry if you had my specific permission.

  • You are being ridiculous. Kissing another girl is not cheating unless you would consider leaving him for a girl.

  • I would consider it cheating, but it wouldn't be that big of a deal to me. You're not attracted to her.

    • no, I'm not attracted to her at all

    • That's what I thought.

  • Ummm...in this instance, I would lean towards no. You're not a lesbian and you reference alcohol (but then again, that was your choice). I wouldn't sweat it too much, though.

  • To me, that's cheating. But... since it was with a girl and you didn't even make out... I don't know what I would do, probablyjust never speak of it again and feel really weird for the next couple weeks.

  • HA! You are fine! You are making the Rocky Mountains out of a molehill...take a chill pill and have a GREAT Weekend! I still love u...:)

    • lol thank you (:

  • personally I won't mind that unless my girlfriend chooses to go with a girl over me

  • No cheating, no problem with it. I would definitely encourage it.

  • i would personally

  • In reality its considered cheating regardless of gender. Most guys will say "oh that's okay" or "oh that's hot" because they're hoping to get some threesome action.

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