I couldn't get hard, I'm so ashamed. :(

[Anonymous]

I brought this girl home with me last night. We hit it off, made out, took off our clothes, and we started fooling around. I have reason to believe that my recent change of prescription meds have caused a different reaction, that and I had a bit to drink that evening. I can't seem to think of any other reason. I was very horny but I could only get it partially erect. I told her how ashamed I was. She seemed to handle it very kindly, told me that it was OK and we could try again tomorrow. She couldn't stay the night with me as she had to return home. We made out again before she got her cab. At the time she sounded interested in having sex again the next day. I called her this morning and left her a voice mail. I'm hoping she returns my call. I'm concerned she has no interest left since it didn't happen. That and I have a history of messing around with me and losing all interest in keeping contact. If a guy can't get hard for a one night stand is it a deal breaker? Should I try calling her again sometime if she doesn't return my call?

[-Asmo-]

The problem is sometimes the girl gets offended that it was because of her, that she wasn't enough of a turn on. I wouldn't panic about it and keep trying to contact her and explain things. Get your story straight and only tell her once. You give her a solid believable reason, not a list of possibilities, you want her definitely to understand it was a once only and it wasn't because of her. So first you don't make it seem like you are overly apologetic or just acting out of guilt. You organise something later to make it seem like genuine interest and you genuinely want to do it, otherwise she will just turn you down on the basis of she thinks you are just feeling guilty. If you've already apologized and explained things, don't say anything else, just wait for maybe 3-4 days and then ask to catch up with her for lunch or something. If you haven't explained anything you say something like "Sorry about the other night, I think its the new medication I have been taking, but I had fun and I really enjoyed dinner (or whatever you did)." FULL STOP THE END. Then wait and contact her in a few days to catch up.

[SkinnyG]

I'd leave out the medication part. That may scare her away.

[-Asmo-]

Thanks G . Alright, then use some excuse but just the one.

[Hidden_P]

I personally wouldn't.

You say it's a one night stand - surely if it's a one night stand and it means nothing you shouldn't be chasing it too much? She obviously doesn't mean that much otherwise you'd want more than one night, right?

Wait till she calls, if she calls. it may be she had been busy, working, or in the bath, or cooking, who knows. There's a reason she didn't pick up.

I don't know about deal breaker, I don't do one night stands. Women don't care about it nearly as much as men think we do...we're aware it happens, don't worry about it!

[goflipaburger]

When my boyfriend and I first started getting intimate he had the same problem. I knew he was just nervous :P It's not even the slightest problem.

Give her a day to respond to the call, if she doesn't call her again and let her know it was definitely because of the medication, but you would love to try again :P

[lottierose]

She seems interested, and I think it would be pretty shallow/mean of her to end something because of one night. And the fact that she still seemed interested afterward (kissing and implying wants to meet up again) probably means she is still interested, simple.

Good luck, hope it all works out for you :)

[Asker]

Thanks, I hope you're right. Should I call/text her in 24 hrs if I don't hear from her today?

[lottierose]

yeah go for it, but keep it casual but still show you're interested :)

[Leamonade]

Not a deal breaker AT ALL. I doubt she'll stop seeing you because of that.

Don't worry so much though, you'll end up with a real problem. Like you said, it's just the work of the meds and the alcohol. Just don't fixate about it too much, it happens.

[Anonymous]

this happened to me and a guy I was fooling around with

it was a little disappointing, but I wasn't mad about it or anything

we had both been drinking and we were making out and he seemed hard, and we were about to have sex, but I got up and got a condom

he for some reason couldn't get it on and I think he was a little soft to begin with and his embarrassment over not being able to get it on made him lose his whole erection

and I tried giving him a blowjob, but it didn't work either

eventually we gave up and then went to sleep

it wasn't a deal breaker for me though, I'd def give him another chance, I guess he was just having an off day

[MikeK]

Condoms are a real erection shrinker for one, plus drinking and frustration - it can happen to ANY man

[Anonymous]

Guys have a lot of pressure that way. We can instantly tell if you are turned on or not. And honestly it might take some doing to get back with that girl. It isn't totally fair to guys, but it'd be difficult as a girl to maintain interest in a guy who appeared to be physically uninterested.

[Anonymous]

The first time I hooked up with the guy I'm currently seeing, he couldn't get hard. We'd been drinking and I figured it was just because he was drunk, but he later admitted it was because he was nervous. He was really worried that I was offended or mad at him, but I wasn't. These things happen.